co dependent counseling

And, another thing is that when I told her my situation in more detail with my kids, she said to me well, I can tell already you have changed, because of one thing: I said, what is that? she said, because they are ALL MAD AT YOU!!! no one is talking to YOU, and that does mean, you have changed something...maybe not allowing them to kick you around any longer!!!!! She said the longer they stay mad, the better it actually is. It is hard to explain here, but she made perfect sense of it.

I know I start to get weak, but this program will be helpful.

Any of you out there who are feeling the need for addition support, might look into this. There is also Co dependent group meetings in most areas that are not associated with any type of Health Program. Mine is, however, but there are others out there. Thanks for letting me share this with you. Have a great day, and stay strong!

part...that is so true. If people are dependent on you it makes them mad at first when they have to do things for themselves. Or when we allow people to kick us around and we start saying NO!!!!

Good for you for going to the counseling...i miss my alcohol too, especially the wine...but, I don't miss the hangovers...and my liver sent me a Thank You Card...hugs, Norma

I am glad you have that under your control and no longer Need your drink, or whatever. I told her I like the taste...and she looked at me as tho that was a REAL problem...geeezzzz. but we shall see...6 mo. is a long long time not to have a few glasses of wine.

How are you doing? hope things are ok for you, and thanks for the feedback and support. Oh, and did I mention here that I mentioned this site and she at first said she did not know of it, then said..oh yes yes, I do know it!!!!

Thanks for the information Sallie, I think I may look into something here like you have mentioned.

One question, I have only read about co-dependency on the threads posted here, and I am confused as to whether it refers to a person's need to be a "people pleaser", where they cannot say no to anything, or a person's need to control/be in control of others.

Either way, I have tendencies in both areas, and it really confuses me.......

When i drink wine I break out in hives that make me look like i have some rare, fatal, disfiguring disease. I call it Pinot Noir revenge...

well today, my drug addicted (or he claim he is cured) son came by when i was not here to pick up a copy of a document. I also left two bags of food...I knew this was NOT something the counselors would say I should have done under the particular situation, but I could not help myself...but this kid...I was curious to see...and I figured this is what he would do....he did NOT take them...left them there. I could not give him birthday gift cards either because I would not hand them over, I said I would meet him at the place....and he was insulted, and bla bla bla....now, this does not sound normal....I have not even seen this son for a bit more than a year now. We lived only about 4 miles apart for about a year, but he refuses phone calls, everything. I know he continues to try to hurt me. I won't give (or try) to give food again. I felt I was kicked, yet again, in the stomach.

I just hand it over to God. all I can do. see the co dependent wants to rescue the person, and do all kinds of things, and coerce them into changing, etc. etc....controlling the situation. controlling the outcome.