Death in the family Support Group

I am new to this site. My brther was killed in a construction accident Oct. 14,1992. My father died Oct 14th 2006 from strokes. It was 14 years to the hour that they died. I wasn't there for my brother but spent the last 3 days holding my Dad's hand. I made the decision to not put him on a feeding tube and wonder every once in awhile if I did the right thing. My Dad was afraid of dying and had just started going to church in the nursing home. He waited until I had the minister say a prayer and for my older brother to leave. It is something I will never forget. Chris

Holidays are so difficult without them around.

What an enormous decision you had to make! Were you alone in the decision process, or did you have anyone else to help decide?

I know when my dad was hospitalized (one of the countless times) about a year ago, we had to discuss code status, DNR, etc, and it was heart wrenching. He did survive the hospitalizations but died at home last November.

My dad also was afraid of sying. He had night terrors about it, even though he returned to church a few months before he died.

I'm sure your dad, like mine, would not have wanted to live for years with a feeding tube, with no quality of life at all. I think all of us feel that way.

I am so sorry for your losses.

What a strange coincidence that your brother and dad died on the same day! Actually, a close childhood friend of mine showed up at my dad's memorial and her dad died in a car accident two years to the day as mine. I really think sometimes that these are not coincidences at all.

Take care,

Sara