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12/08/2009 08:46 PM

Hard Times

Andrew79
Andrew79  
Posts: 27
Member

After six months of unemployment after moving back to Florida I was able t pull in a seasonal job with UPS. My health has lousy and the pain constant for several months now but I was excited to get out and work again. Two days into the job I was in the hospital with a bowel obstruction and come to find out a hernia as well. I have just become so tired and weighed down with this disease. It feels like anytime something good is coming my way I get sick as a dog and blow any chance of happiness. I am just run down and hurt too much. I am going to attempt to get S.S. benefits to support my family but its hard getting help with the process. I just don't have the energy anymore, I can hardly laugh these days and that all I had.
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12/09/2009 01:20 AM
sarahannegilmer
sarahannegilmer  
Posts: 21
New Member

I get disability due to my on crohn's disease and honestly it wasen't that hard to get. It took about a year from filing to getting a cheak and I appealed it.. The first thing i did was got an attorney and my doctors all agreed i couldn't work. So if you have a doctor that agrees that you can't work it helps alot. I was told it wasen't just the crohn's disease but the depresion why I GOT the disability. I have 2 kids so i know how you feel that you need to support your family. if you have ?'s feel free to ask me!

12/09/2009 04:23 AM
libit
libit  
Posts: 2449
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

Andrew~ I am so sorry you are dealing with all this, especially at the holidays. Even though you did get the seasonal job at UPS that is a job you should not even consider! I did it once years ago and it about killed me. The work is so physical people in our condition just cannot handle that physical aspect of working. Try and find a lawer that is in your area. I just hired one myself about 1 month ago after being denied myself. They are working on more of a personal level then some of the bigger companies. And they know the system in my area. Its not easy thats for sure. But you have been thru so much you should fight it all you can. I don't know how hard it is in Florida to get disability but in VA they are pretty bad. So I wish you the best of luck and hope you go for it. Please let us know how you're doing.

12/09/2009 05:07 AM
Andrew79
Andrew79  
Posts: 27
Member

Thank you for your words of advice and reassurance. I have been looking at my UPS uniform thinking should I dare try a second time or is the risk to great. All my love ones tell me to not to go back, and if I hurt this bad just being a house husband I know there right. It's just hard! It is just so emotional for me knowing what I want to provide for my wife and son but don't have the physical ability to anymore. My PCP is going to help me with S.S. but she believes if I apply under anxiety rather than physical alone I stand a better chase. It is just so embarrassing.

I want to thank everyone for your support I have just been so withdrawn and feeling alone as of late. It helps to talk to people who can understand 1st hand. I feel at the end after 14yrs of this it's hard not to consider a selfish easy way out. I have a DNR order and on Wednesday the NG tube got stuck in my wind pipe and brought me to the brink of suffocation. The bad part is along with the initial fear I was hopeful that it was my time to pass. I just feel so useless. A man that can't provide for his family knowing I am financially worth more gone than here. I know my wife loves me but it is not fair for her to have to carry the burden of my disease.

Once again thank you for letting me express my feeling and your kind support.


12/09/2009 05:18 AM
libit
libit  
Posts: 2449
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

Andrew I do believe it is harder for a man dealing with this disease then us women. My husband is the strong silent type and he would be lost not being able to work. But being his wife I would demand that he take care of himself and stop worrying about being the breadwinner of the family. He is more precious to me then money or materialistic things. I'm sure your wife feels the same way about you. Listen to your family and stop looking at that UPS suit! Take it back and tell them your situation. You certainly don't need to risk your health over that job. And please know that we all care here. If you have to use the stress or depression side of this disease to get disability then do it. I'm sure you have paid your dues with crohns and you deserve to be shown respect for carrying this burden. Try to find something to laugh about today. Maybe just a little humor in something. I wish you nothing but the best in the days ahead.

12/09/2009 05:44 AM
libit
libit  
Posts: 2449
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

Dealing with crohns has so many sides and I'm goint to post what it has been for me. First, denial that I had a disease that would cause me to not be who I was or stop me from running full throttle ahead. Second, frustration that no one was actually helping me understand crohns, third, giving up and realizing no one would ever take me and my disease seriously and fourth, anger tired of waiting around for the doctors to help me get better and taking the bull by the horns myself and fighting for myself. I will not let anyone poo poo this disease and wait for help. I will take whatever means necessary to get my point across and make my doctors do what ever is necessary to get me thru another flare up. I don't have the patience anymore to be laying helpless in my bed and nothing being done to try and make me somewhat better. Anger seems to work better for me in getting my point across with those who do not listen and are not willing to take all necessary routes of controling my disease.

12/09/2009 05:49 AM
libit
libit  
Posts: 2449
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

BTW~ If they think I'm crazy I have no problem with that. I am past all that. If I tell you I am sick and need help then they need to listen because I will be on their butts until they are sick of me! Smile I think we all reach this point with crohns and the only way to get thru to them is to be downright demanding at times.

12/09/2009 07:42 AM
sarahannegilmer
sarahannegilmer  
Posts: 21
New Member

You know any man that wants to support his family and will go to work sick needs a pat on the back. I'm telling you everything will be fine and you will get thru this and your family will support you! Like i said i get disabilty and it's so nice i don't have to worry about being sick and working! I think that's a good idea about how your doctor use the anxiety and that's what got my social sec to go thru. Have a nice xmas and i'll be thinking about you!

12/10/2009 12:13 PM
Andrew79
Andrew79  
Posts: 27
Member

I want to thank everyone for your help!

12/10/2009 06:09 PM
libit
libit  
Posts: 2449
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

Andrew you are very welcome. We all understand the emotions this disease causes us. But I do hope you found one thing lately that gave a you just a tiny bit of a smile. Smile

Take care and please let us know how you're doing!

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