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11/03/2009 03:52 PM

hello i have full phy and legal cust but....

OriJnel
OriJnel  
Posts: 21
Member

So i got full legal and physical custody of my 3 months old baby at the time but i have a very strange hard and open parent plan.. Since my abusive ex who i have a pfa on is in portland oregon the judge made it so he has to come out here to see her due to her being to little to fly on the plane. But he doesnt fly. And said in the conference which he didnt appear and it was on the telephone call the 3 of us judge him and I .He made the biggest deal about wanting to see our daughter and has made no effort to even contact me at allll about her its been since may and has not even asked for anything. The parent plan pretty much says he can see her whenever but i have to clear it and its according to when i say its ok for him to come here. But the thing is since i kind of knew this woudl happen with him not doing anything i asked the judge what if he doesnt have any contact or come out her at all what can i do as of getting his parental rights terminated and he said that if in 3 years there is no contact or visitation i coudl get his rights terminated involuntarily meaning he has no control so i am just patiently waiting but upset about him having the control over holding the 3 years over my head. So he coudl not talk or ask abou ther in 2 3/4 years then just write me how is veona doing and then i cant terminate his rights. It annoys me has me angry and devistated. I get no child support an dcan NEVER because he is on disablilty and has no famlily fund which makes him no liable to do so... this man gets scott free with nothing for her whole life. I dont know how i feel abou teverything.. i Know its prolly for the best he is out of our lives but want the 3 years to hurry so i can know i will never have to deal wiht him or his family and just never be scared he will come back into her life or mine. Any guess on wha the might due?
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11/07/2009 05:52 AM
nsnelling
nsnelling  
Posts: 877
Member

First off I am sorry that you have to go through this it is tough. Secondly I want to congratulate you in doing the right thing. I know how hard it canm be. Did you know that just because he has disability doesnt mean you cant get child support. All you have to do is go down to the social security office and apply for child support under his name for her. I did it and get support for my daughter. Not much but its better then nothing. I know some people who get over a hundred dollars a month in child support for their parent who has disabilities. I know this is all hard but if you hang in their the best will will out in the end.

11/07/2009 12:07 PM
OriJnel
OriJnel  
Posts: 21
Member

Yea i thought so too .. i already when to the soc security office and i cant get anything because he only workd 5 years and added no money into what they call a family fund so there is no money for me to get anytihng from and legally they can not take money from his acutaly dissablility check .. so i get 000000000000$$$ it sucks really bad but o well.. thanks for the support it was very hard to leave him and stuff butnow i no its for the best and i am not gettin torn apart every day!

11/07/2009 10:03 PM
nsnelling
nsnelling  
Posts: 877
Member

Thats good that you are healing from it, and your welcome for the support that is why I had mdjunction put this group together. We all need support in going through tough child custody battles.
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