Borderline Personality Support Group

The therapist I started seeing a few months ago just isn't going to cut it. I've only seen her 5 or 6 times, but it's painfully obvious and really has been since around the third visit but I thought I would give it more just in case.

When she called to set up the first appt she was already talking about spacing the appts further apart than what I do best with. The third visit she asked if I thought things were a match when I brought up some questions, and said to tell her as soon as I knew because she had a waiting list and didn't want to waste her time or mine. When I called for the first time I was able to get out 5 weeks after my surgery and she asked how I have been I told her I had a lot of stuff going on that had me overwhelmed. She asked if I wanted to wait until I wasn't so overwhelmed to see her. Seriously?! Pretty sure that's the best time for me to see her. Then I have my appt and I thought it was passable and when we were setting up my next appt she asked me AGAIN if I knew if I wanted to continue seeing her.

All that on top of asking me the same stuff I had told her 1 or 2 sessions prior when she takes notes is just too much for me to take. I'm going to try the one my old therapist that I loved suggested even though I will only see her every two weeks. The soon-to-be old one is right....I don't want to waste my time.

Post edited by: peaches261, at: 10/07/2011 02:28 PM

Sounds like a good choice, Peaches. Why waste your time? It's too precious, plus sounds frustrating. Goodvluck eith the change.

peaches, definitely time to move on, so good for you. Unfortunately it often take's many attempts and lots of time and frustration to find a good one who we click with. Keep pushing forward!

She asked if I wanted to wait until I wasn't so overwhelmed to see her. Seriously?!

... un- freakin-believeable

Unfortunately I have no idea where my old therapist that I loved so much is, or believe me I would have been there months ago. She did suggest someone she knew well and thought would be good for me. The only reason I didnt go to her right away was that she could only see me every 2 weeks and I'm supposed to go every week.

My pdoc suggested the one I've been seeing. She has had training with BPD, but I think just the training everyone gets. I'm guessing she hasnt worked with many( I hope for their sake haha). She mainly works in substance abuse. I'm sure she does well with them. Although I got in there pretty fast for someone with a waiting list. That could have been my pdocs work though, she's good at pulling strings when I'm in need of something.

So, it's been two weeks since I requested to be sent to a new therapist. The one I'm seeing now was on vacation last week, but came back Monday and I've still heard nothing. For someone who was constantly asking if I had decided whether I wanted to stay with her or not she sure is taking her sweet ass time referring me.

I fear this therapist is having her own issues.

And so not your fault or your problem!

I hope you get someone else.

I am dealing with something similar---posted about it just now.

A therapist, in my view, (my opinion; ppl may disagree) needs to be able to deal with someone who is "overwhelmed" that's their job!

she obviously cannot do it.

sorry if I sound intense.

We need to be able to be who we are with a therapist; that "match" is so important.

Carol

I completely agree. I think she lacks the understanding that textbook training and actually having the experience of working with people who have BPD are completely different things. I still miss my old therapist immensely, but I don't really mention that often. She doesn't agree with the old ones methods, but she was the perfect person to help me and even my pdoc agrees that she was made progress in two months that the previous one hadn't come anywhere close to in almost 2 years. I'm going to call her again Monday, and if I don't hear from her by Wed when I have an appt with my pdoc I will let my pdoc know, and she will help.

As I had guessed, I had to get the therapist situation figured out during my appt with my pdoc. She sent the old one an im asking if she had contacted the one I wanted referred to. She said she had, and the other one could see me, but I would have to see her at a different office about 30 mins away (she is only at the one I go to one day, every other week). I said I was fine with that, so my pdoc sent an im to her to let her know. She told her she has openings at my clinic, so I won't have to make the 30 min drive. I see her for the first time Oct 7th.

I am glad you got something figured out peaches. You have just a few days until you see her. Please be sure to let us know how things go. I know how important this is to you.

I met with the new one today. I can't really judge how helpful she will be until I've seen her for a while, but if nothing else she at least seems to be headed in a good direction. She also seems very knowledgeable, and tolerant of my ADHD kid, random, cursing, bouncing between topics self