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10/08/2010 06:16 AM

Advice for sister.

mem1569

I do not have BPD, but I believe my sister to. She has recently been diagnosed with Severe Anxiety Disorder by her psychiatrist and has just recently returned to work after 4 months. I believe her to actually have BPD, but since I'm not a MD and she will not tell him everything that I have witnessed, he cannot diagnose her correctly.She is an alcoholic, which doesn't help things and now she's on antidepressants and xanex. She loves me and wants to hangout with me one minute and then the next minute she blames me for every decision she has made in her life. My boyfriend lives with us and she despises him for no reason. Recently it has come to a head, the other night she went out with her friends for a couple of drinks. It ended up with her drinking 9 beers and doing whiskey shots. She called me at work (I work overnights as an assistant manager)and said how she hates her life and she wants to hang herself (she has tried suicide before but refuses to tell her MD). I left work to pick her up and I was going to take her to the hospital. When she foundout about that she tried to jump out of the car. I decided to take her back to her vehicle and follow her home and I parked sideways behind her. She knew I was behind her and she slammed into my driver side door where I was sitting and drove off. I called the police to see if they could take her to a mental health facility and intercept her so she doesn't injure herself or someone else. Of course they caught up with her at our house, but nothing was done. Suffice to say two days later she apologized and was kind and caring. Well today, she blamed me for even caring and parking behind her and she's not dealing with it. The she proceeded to tell me how I have never done anything for her my entire life and that I'm fat,ugly, pathetic,etc...I know it's a long winded story, but I'm at a loss and depression is kicking in. I don't know what to do or say. I've tried to be understanding, but then I feel taken advantage of and now I'm trying the "Tough Love" but that's not working. We own a house together, which is a problem because I want to sell and she won't let me. I feel bad for wanting to separate myself from her, but I feel like I'm losing myself. I don't usually talk to people about these things because I know everyone has their own problems to deal with, but I don't know where else to turn to.
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10/10/2010 01:51 AM
Angela2
Angela2  
Posts: 2513
VIP Member

Hi Tags and welcome! You may be able to get a bit of feedback if you follow this link:

http://www.mdjunction.com/forums/friends-and-family-of-bpds- discussions/general-support

The forum is relatively new and I realize it's slow there so I'll just reply to you here.

I'm sorry your sis is making your life difficult. Is there a reason that you believe your sis has bpd? Is it mainly from reading about the symptoms or has she talked to you about it and feels it could be what she is suffering from?

It's very hard to even give you a clue as to the possibility of it being bpd and I can tell you're aware that only a Dr. could actually make the diagnosis. It doesn't mean that we can't search for information about it and try to learn more on the subject.

Has your sis always been this way? Is there the possibility that she may be an active alcoholic and many of these problems would disappear if she went to treatment and got sober? Many of the things you mentioned could be alcoholic traits if she is still drinking. Was she like this during her childhood and before her drinking started?

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