Borderline Personality Support Group

I am so very upset right now. I went through my bf's phone and his e-mails. I found out that he has been texting his ex-girlfriend the entire time he's been with me. He told her he loved her and misses her and that she is the love of his life. I asked him about her and he said, oh that was the past and that part of my life is over. But apparently not because he has been texting her over and over right up until a few days ago. He's been lying to my face! I'm so upset right now. I tried talking to him about her and he got mad that I went through his phone but I don't care. I don't trust him and this is what I find. I am so upset. I can't stop crying. How could he do this to me? I've tried to talk to him in the past about it and he said she was just a part of his past. But apparently not if they've been texting back and forth and he still tells her he loves her. The whole time I have been asking him about her he just said that that was over. He has been a liar! He wonders why I go through his phone. Because I don't trust him. And this is what I find! She is the love of his life and he misses her and loves her. While the whole time he told me that he doesn't like me to say "I love you" to him while he was telling her that he loves her. He's still in love with her. And all I was to him was a piece of ass on the side. I am so hurt and upset. He lied to me again. And just when I thought things were going good he screws me over again.

Post edited by: countto10, at: 04/15/2011 02:42 AM

I am so sorry for your pain. I have felt the pain of feeling betrayed and used. You have some decisions to make about what you should do. I agree with count- pameper yourself right now and make sure you remind yourself that your self worth is more important than anything else. Hang in there doll

I am so sorry hon. I think we've all been there one time or another, and it just sucks, plain and simple. I agree with April and the other ladies; now is a time to take care of yourself. Do things that make you feel good, while you work through the feelings this brings up. **hugs**

(((((((((Spider)))))))))), I'm so sorry. I agree with everything that has been said and I would do the same thing that Count would do. He doesn't deserve you and even if you stay together, it would be difficult to have a loving and trusting relationship.

The fact that he was caught and now tries to spin it that this is YOUR fault for going through his phone and discovering it, says a lot about him. Only you can make the decision, but there is someone out there who would love you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated and it doesn't sound like it'll be him.

Thanks guys. I went through his phone again last night, and I found even more women that he has been in touch with and flirting and saying things he also says to me. I deleted all their numbers and texts! He is gonna be pissed but I don't care. He is not going to contact them anymore or I am GONE! I thought all this time that he was committing to me only because he told me I'm his girlfriend. But apparently, just like in the beginning, he keeps talking to the other women. And the ironic thing is that he is always asking who I'm texting; he says, oh you're texting your bf again? I'm texting my best friend and that's it. I'm not talking to any guys on the side. I admit I was when he and I broke up for a week or two, but then I got rid of them so I could commit to my bf. It's just not fair. It has hurt me so bad. After reading these texts, it's like he doesn't even care about me. He's been doing all of this behind my back! I call him on it and he won't even talk to me about it. He just gives excuses. He says, oh well who I am with right now? - You! But still he is cheating on me if he's talking to these women. I am going to keep checking his phone so he doesn't talk to these chicks.

Hey Spider, and HUGS!

I've not been able to get on here much lately, so I have to ask, is this the same guy you were with over the summer? With the brother whose wife was being a bitch to you?

Either way, sounds like a loser. Toss him out. And props deleting all the numbers!

Elle

Hey Indubitably,

Yes, this is the same guy. His brother's wife is still being a b!tch to me. She's even talking sh!t about me to my bf's family. I don't know what her problem is.

Although I deleted the numbers, these women can still contact him. He promised me he won't talk to them anymore. Plus he is really good with numbers so he might remember them anyways. I will check his phone again and see if he continues to contact these women. He insists that he does not love his ex anymore but I don't believe him after the texts I saw. I have no remorse in going through his phone because I don't trust him. How can I ever trust him again?

Post edited by: countto10, at: 04/15/2011 02:32 AM

Doesn't sound like you can trust him at all. In words or in actions.

Elle