Bisexuality Support Group

Greetings from extreme northern California! I am new to this room and to the whole "coming out" thing so Im nervous. Ive been with my current partner for 2.5 yrs but it is not a very healthy relationship as I have been very physically unhealthy and she mothers over me. The other night after my gallery opening she was lecturing me and I had had it so I snapped...I know I was wrong but it was all I could do to keep my sanity. I have many "labels" and my bipolar (which I am treating) is cycling downward and Im manically depressive and nearly suicidal. I cant share it with her because Im afraid she will just have me locked away somewhere. I havent told my parents of our relationship and they have told me in the past that I cant come home anyway so Im looking at being homeless here very soon unless I just shut up and take her continual lectures. Sorry for the depressive introduction. Tonia

Hi Tonia and welcome...

Sounds like you have a lot going on right now, glad that your reaching out for support..

Coming out can definatly be a very scary process at first but gets easier as you practice more and more, sometimes it jst takes a while to figure out who you can trust..if you want more info on that please feel free to write more about that subject...but the thing that concerns me most about your posting is that you say you are close to being suicidal and to anybody who is in that situation i feel it is imperitive that you go directly to a doctor and seek professional help...we here can speak from our own experiences but are not professionals..

Also, i noticed that you mentioned that you are bipolar, there are several bipolar groups here at mdj and im sure that you can find the right match for you, there is nothing better than hearing from people who understand where you are or have been and have been there themselves. They always have great insights because they can relate to you in a non-judgemental way.

Jst 2 other questions for you, one is why you cant go home and the other is im wondering if you can talk to your partner when you are not in a downward spiral? When you are thinking more clearly? Take care..

I have talked this through woth my partner and all is well. I scared her the other night when I had to call the suicide prevention hotline...that is what got us talking again. She is going to go to my next therapy session with me to discuss our issues.

My parents wont let me come home because they chose my ex-husband in the divorce. My depression at the time was terrible and they were ready to have me "locked away" for it...in the state of Nebraska it takes 2 signatures to have you hospitalized. I did all that I could to fight it and moved to Cleveland for a nanny job that didnt work out. I had to pay my mom to fly out to rent a van to move me back within a week and had to stay with them.

I got into management with a major retail company and moved to Salt Lake City, where I eventually had to live in hiding because I was raped by my landlord. He gave me the aggressive form of HPV causing cervical cancer and I had to go back to my parents again to have the surgery done. I had to pay them gas money to take me to and from the hospital for the surgery. I met my partner 17 days after my surgery and 11 days after meeting her moved 1658 miles away to live with her.

Im so glad to hear that you sought out emergency help when you needed it and equally glad to hear that your partner is being supportive and will be joining you for your session. Good that the lines of communication have been reopend between you and your partner and having an objective 3rd party person should help get things on a better track for you two. . Im sorry to hear that your family doesnt seem to be a part of your support system right now. Please keep us updated as to how things are going with you.

They dont know that we are more than just roommates. I havent told them and dont know how or if I even want to. We talk about non heavy subjects like the weather and food but thats about it. My next younger brother beat me when he was on drugs because his girfriend told him that it was the way that fat bit**es are supposed to be treated...my ex pulled me out from under from him. My other brother doesnt talk to me and I dont know why. So Im in California and the rest of the family is back in Nebraska.

Sounds like a good distance!! There are all kinds of family. Chosen family, birth family.... I often find the Family we choose is the best fit! Go forth and add to your new family- and if the birth one changes, you can always let them back in.

Thank you all for listening and for all of your support! I know that this is a room for bisexuality and I am a lesbian but you are all amazing! Your words of wisdom are great. I truly appreciate it!

are you famiiar with the age old expresion you can choose your friends but you cant choose your family?? well, that may be the case BUT you can choose weather or not to have anything to do with them. yes, in some cases 1 bad apple can poison the crop and 1 discussion could cure it but there are also cases where, if you havnt got the right words you will end up being poisoned. it is best at times to distance and build yourself ready for the harvest. it sounds like you are well on your way to becoming a fine sunflower crop so like them, stand tall and proud.

steve