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10/17/2011 12:46 PM

gotta start somewhere(page 2)

bfly
bfly  
Posts: 4078
VIP Member

Yes...that makes sense and, no, you don't sound "crazy". It can be difficult with meds... for me it messes with my creativity- I write poetry and love photography... yet I feel like I have to actually force inspiration because the meds have taken that from me to some extent... i think that's part of the drug and alcohol abuse... I need to feel like a little bit of me-you know? It's all very tricky. I just wish you well and know we are all here to support you through your journey.
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10/17/2011 01:49 PM
3Lions66
3Lions66  
Posts: 26
Member

Glad you're here. Brilliant place to get started on a new life Me thinks!

Cheers,

Jacob


10/17/2011 02:03 PM
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member

yes...that's why the holistic (no med) approach appeals to me so. If I had money I'd go tomorrow. Does any one know of a place like this with a work program ?!!! Seriously, I want all these meds out of my system and it would be great to do that under a monitored setting...but, I'm dreaming. I'm here, alone ('cept for precious animals and my new forum friends)and I really do want to figure this out. Depression seems to be lifting a little...yesterday I took a shower...can't remember last time...went outside and even raked a big pile of leaves and got some sun.

10/17/2011 02:56 PM
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member

Naomi....correction...you said we all know WHEN we need meds...sorry, I read that wrong. I agree, unless we've cycled quickly into the mania phase where we pass the ability to think clearly...and that's the dilemma. Does my brain need a drug, but my mind is too f'd up to recognize it ?

10/17/2011 08:44 PM
NaomiHyde
NaomiHyde  
Posts: 711
Member

I think that's a bit of self doubt learning not to trust yourself if you can't honestly say you don't need them then you probably do need them but I still think you know for sure unless your psychotic.

Hugs

Naomi


10/18/2011 09:18 AM
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member

Today I feel like my batteries are slowly draining and I'm not interested in recharging. If I get a jump I'll take it, but in the meantime I'm going back to bed. I have been able to read a few posts, threads and stories and I'm pulling for those of you who are also struggling out there...I'm not totally selfish...just mostly. So many of you have so much more to deal with and my issues seem so petty by comparison. It's a rainy day in Georgia....in case you don't know the rest..."sometimes I feel like it's raining all over the world". Dee

10/18/2011 09:27 AM
bfly
bfly  
Posts: 4078
VIP Member

My heart goes out to you because I can hear your sadness. I really dislike the days you are describing... all I can say is just take good care of yourself today and post away to vent if you need to- we are here for you. Hope you feel better sooner rather than later! Hope that "jump" comes soon!

10/18/2011 09:29 AM
hunkydorie
hunkydorie  
Posts: 2058
Group Leader

Hi,bipodee

There have been many a time when I have just gone back to bed. Do what you have to to take care of yourself. In one of your postings you mentioned a holistic approach to the treatment of bipolar, I think! If I could go to a facility where they took me off my meds where I could see how I'd do, I think it would forsure be the tall tale sign that I do indeed have bipolar. Sometimes it is easy to forget that, hey, maybe I do have this illness. Sorry, kind of got off on a tangent. As far as a holistic approach, I am not real familiar with that area. Anyway, do take care of yourself.


10/22/2011 06:45 PM
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member

thanks Kelti....not much has changed...been reading here and over at the other BP forum...know I need to call pdoc but keep letting time pass...there are some wonderful peeps on these sites...you inspire me to keep going...just don't know where.

10/22/2011 11:10 PM
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member

I took my meds at midnight...the racing thoughts were beginning to make the Daytona 500 look tame...oh well, back in the game...when you alienate everyone...even the wonderful understanding ones with similar issues, you are really bad off.
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