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Only Bipolars Forums › Introductions & Personal Stories › gotta start somewhere
10/17/2011 12:46 PM
bfly
bfly
 
Posts: 4061
VIP Member
Yes...that makes sense and, no, you don't sound "crazy". It can be difficult with meds... for me it messes with my creativity- I write poetry and love photography... yet I feel like I have to actually force inspiration because the meds have taken that from me to some extent... i think that's part of the drug and alcohol abuse... I need to feel like a little bit of me-you know? It's all very tricky. I just wish you well and know we are all here to support you through your journey.
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears. And how else can it be? The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Kahlil Gibran

"The sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being." Carl Jung

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” Leo F. Buscaglia

"Always fall in with what you're asked to accept. Take what is given, and make it over your way. My aim in life has always been to hold my own with whatever's going. Not against: with."
Robert Frost

"God doesn't give us more than we can handle, I just think He overestimates my strength!" lol- me

Bipolar I, PTSD, Bulimia, Anxiety, Fibromyalgia

Lithium 1500 mg; Lamictal 400mg; Busparone 60 mg; Armour Thyroid 30; Visteril as needed
Reply

10/17/2011 01:49 PM  Top
3Lions66
3Lions66
 
Posts: 26
Member
Glad you're here. Brilliant place to get started on a new life Me thinks!

Cheers,

Jacob

“My greatest challenge is not what’s happening at the moment, my greatest challenge was knocking Liverpool right off their fucking perch. And you can print that.”(Sir Alex Ferguson responding to Alan Hansen questioning Sir Alex Ferguson’s future as Manchester United manager in September 2002 in the Guardian.)

Manchester is my Heaven! Eric Cantona 1999


"It takes a big man to cry. And, an even bigger man to laugh at that man." Jack Handy SNL

10/17/2011 02:03 PM  Top
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member
yes...that's why the holistic (no med) approach appeals to me so. If I had money I'd go tomorrow. Does any one know of a place like this with a work program ?!!! Seriously, I want all these meds out of my system and it would be great to do that under a monitored setting...but, I'm dreaming. I'm here, alone ('cept for precious animals and my new forum friends)and I really do want to figure this out. Depression seems to be lifting a little...yesterday I took a shower...can't remember last time...went outside and even raked a big pile of leaves and got some sun.

Previous discussions I participated in:
Hi All. I'm new here.
So Pissed
should i go off my meds

10/17/2011 02:56 PM  Top
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member
Naomi....correction...you said we all know WHEN we need meds...sorry, I read that wrong. I agree, unless we've cycled quickly into the mania phase where we pass the ability to think clearly...and that's the dilemma. Does my brain need a drug, but my mind is too f'd up to recognize it ?

Previous discussions I participated in:
Hi All. I'm new here.
So Pissed
should i go off my meds

10/17/2011 08:44 PM  Top
NaomiHyde
NaomiHyde
 
Posts: 711
Member
I think that's a bit of self doubt learning not to trust yourself if you can't honestly say you don't need them then you probably do need them but I still think you know for sure unless your psychotic.

Hugs

Naomi

10/18/2011 09:18 AM  Top
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member
Today I feel like my batteries are slowly draining and I'm not interested in recharging. If I get a jump I'll take it, but in the meantime I'm going back to bed. I have been able to read a few posts, threads and stories and I'm pulling for those of you who are also struggling out there...I'm not totally selfish...just mostly. So many of you have so much more to deal with and my issues seem so petty by comparison. It's a rainy day in Georgia....in case you don't know the rest..."sometimes I feel like it's raining all over the world". Dee

Previous discussions I participated in:
Hi All. I'm new here.
So Pissed
should i go off my meds

10/18/2011 09:27 AM  Top
bfly
bfly
 
Posts: 4061
VIP Member
My heart goes out to you because I can hear your sadness. I really dislike the days you are describing... all I can say is just take good care of yourself today and post away to vent if you need to- we are here for you. Hope you feel better sooner rather than later! Hope that "jump" comes soon!
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears. And how else can it be? The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Kahlil Gibran

"The sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being." Carl Jung

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” Leo F. Buscaglia

"Always fall in with what you're asked to accept. Take what is given, and make it over your way. My aim in life has always been to hold my own with whatever's going. Not against: with."
Robert Frost

"God doesn't give us more than we can handle, I just think He overestimates my strength!" lol- me

Bipolar I, PTSD, Bulimia, Anxiety, Fibromyalgia

Lithium 1500 mg; Lamictal 400mg; Busparone 60 mg; Armour Thyroid 30; Visteril as needed

10/18/2011 09:29 AM  Top
hunkydorie
hunkydorie
 
Posts: 1426
Group Leader
Hi,bipodee

There have been many a time when I have just gone back to bed. Do what you have to to take care of yourself. In one of your postings you mentioned a holistic approach to the treatment of bipolar, I think! If I could go to a facility where they took me off my meds where I could see how I'd do, I think it would forsure be the tall tale sign that I do indeed have bipolar. Sometimes it is easy to forget that, hey, maybe I do have this illness. Sorry, kind of got off on a tangent. As far as a holistic approach, I am not real familiar with that area. Anyway, do take care of yourself.

Ambien 10mgs./No longer on Seroquel
Geodon 120 mgs.
Levothyroxin 137mcgs.
Lamictal 300mgs and ativan PRN
I am not a physician and only give feedback based on my opinions
Without Christ in my life, I am nothing.

10/22/2011 06:45 PM  Top
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member
thanks Kelti....not much has changed...been reading here and over at the other BP forum...know I need to call pdoc but keep letting time pass...there are some wonderful peeps on these sites...you inspire me to keep going...just don't know where.

Previous discussions I participated in:
Hi All. I'm new here.
So Pissed
should i go off my meds

10/22/2011 11:10 PM  Top
bipodee
Posts: 34
Member
I took my meds at midnight...the racing thoughts were beginning to make the Daytona 500 look tame...oh well, back in the game...when you alienate everyone...even the wonderful understanding ones with similar issues, you are really bad off.

Previous discussions I participated in:
Hi All. I'm new here.
So Pissed
should i go off my meds
Reply

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