Bipolars Only Online Support Group

How many times have you heard a word or phrase and knew exactly how you felt about it? How many times have you not known how you feel or think about a situation that could have gone differently if approached from an internal point of view? How many times have you asked yourself “What does this mean to me?” while searching for the answers that help define who you are? There are so many questions that I have and want the answers to all of them. Patience is a virtue here.

I believe that questions give the brain exercise and with our failing concentration and memory, we need all the exercise we can get to get the brain cells stimulated. I know I do. That and it is always a good thing to explore our internal world and it ends up being a bit easier when we aren’t trying to do it all by ourselves. There is also a lesser chance for a twisted answer. Remember, only you have the answer for yourself.

Anyway, I think this could be a very good exercise to determine our own truths and myths within our minds. This is not as easy of an exercise as it looks. We all have difficult questions that we want answers to. Sometimes sharing helps us to sort through the muck.

Side note: I want to make it clear that ANYONE can post a question at ANY TIME. In fact, it is strongly encouraged that you do share. There are no rules as to who can share and who can’t, how often someone shares, repetition or originality, short or long and what manner it is shared. It doesn’t matter as this is not a competition but an exploration. Just be yourself.

I do hope that some inner reflection will help you to understand yourself better. I know it helps me.

(Please use “I” statements considering it is about what something means to you)

Post edited by: TexasYankee, at: 10/31/2011 11:09 AM

Today’s question is: "What does being alone mean to you?"

For myself, I know there is a difference between being lonely and being alone. When I am alone, I try to feel comfortable in my own skin. It is so uncomfortable. There is a lot of peace and serenity when I can be by myself and feel alright with it. Some days it is almost down right impossible for me to feel okay in my skin. Being alone with myself is one of the best and most healing gifts I can give to myself.

So much of my life has revolved around being lonely and trying to fill the gaping void that seems to live within me. However, being alone is not a bad thing. It allows me time to slow down, if I can, and it allows me to take care of me. The more I grow, the less of a void that is present.

Taking care of me is always internal work. If I am unable to, for whatever reason, I will try to return to my mind as many times as it takes to create a positive perspective. I don’t know how I shift it exactly but shifting it is vital to my well-being. Don’t get me wrong, this is extremely challenging for me to do.

I like spending time alone with myself but the feeling of loneliness can sneak up and be quite overwhelming. My thoughts get very twisted and loneliness ends up bringing out all of my negative feelings and thoughts. I have thoughts such as “I am not good enough for anyone to be with me.” Or “I will go crazy if I am left alone with my mind for too long”, or my favorite, “I am not worthy of having relationships so that must be why I am alone.” I tell myself all sorts of messed up things instead of appreciating the time that I have to be alone with myself to strengthen my relationship with myself. Being alone is not a bad thing and it is vital that I have a good relationship with my mind, body and spirit.

To me, an important key is to know that one is true and one is false. For me, being alone and feeling alright in my own skin is the true path. Feeling lonely is an absence of healthy thoughts within me. As someone having bipolar, if I give in to loneliness, it gets me into all sorts of trouble. All of my manic symptoms seem to ensue to try to get rid of the negative perspective and skin crawling feeling or I sink into a hard depression. Either way, it is not right either. Sometimes, being human kind of bites

I tend to ask myself, “Am I okay with myself, all by myself”. If I can answer yes (honestly!), then I know that I am on the right path. If I feel lonely, I tend to feel as though I am crawling out of my skin.

Feeling lonely and trying to fill that empty feeling always fails. It has to come from inside me, to feel okay with it. Once I learned the difference between being alone and being lonely, it was easier for me to recognize the difference. Not necessarily act appropriately but at least I know.

So, what does being alone to you mean?

Being alone... is safety, is fear, is comfort, is lonely, time to my self, can leave me too much in my head, actually... is impossible for me because I believe God chills with me when I'm away from others... Fun Post... can we pm you some questions you may want to use as well?

If you have a question that you want to share, just post it in the reply.

Everyone has questions and it is interesting to see how others respond.

What does being alone mean to me?....well for the mostpart I am alone during a good majority of the day. I have learned that it is okay to be alone, although there r times and have been times when I wish that there would be a knock at the door with someone to visit with me. Mind you, only if I have had a shower and I am properly dressed. So having said that must certainly indicate that I don't always take my showers right off the bat after getting up. So, in that case, I guess I wouldn't want that knock at the door. Being alone gives me time to reflect, to think, to sort out my thoughts,sort out my thoughts inbetween doing housework, time to do my bible study and prayer, time to sing aloud to music which I really love because I am a singer. Being alone can sometimes be hard, too, because I don't have that adult to adult communication or company during the day. Now it's not to be said that I don't periodically get out which I do, it's just that when I choose to I have to motivate myself big time to get out. Most of me wants to stay home where I feel safe, secure and at peace, where I don't have to deal with the world with some people who could potentially be not so kind to me. People that I don't know, of course. I used to get out a lot more, but for some reason the van usually just sits in the yard. I think it's the security of knowing it's there if I need it and also to transport my child to school. Being alone allows me to listen to the quietness, to the sounds of the pings on the keyboard as I type, the sounds from the fridge, the dishwaster or the washer during it's spin cycle. I am reminded that life is like a circle going round and round. Situations, events, sometimes unanswered questions and just those times when wishing why can't things be different or better. Being alone brings solitude, a touch of whisper, a phone call, a program to watch or a good book to read. Being alone has never really bothered me too much. I just feel like being alone and when in it's intensity requires that something changes and can change from day to day takes place. I guess I am happy for now in my lonliness because I know where I can find the solitude when I want from my church, my good quality friends (not a lot of quality friends) but those who r dear to me. For now I have peace, perhaps not from this illness that my body holds, but that I have a inner strength that keeps me going. Thank God for that!

being alone gives me the space to think. With less pressure to do 'the right thing' my mind becomes more creative, calmer if you will. The space to be me and do me things, freeing room in my mind to love my husband and my family the way they deserve to be loved. Not as an afterthought in my mind, but pure and unselfishly.

I feel that being alone gives me peace and time to think. No one is there to judge your thoughts, words, or actions. However, to much time alone can make me depressed.

Excellent! I enjoy reading your responses.

Today's question is "Who/What is in control of your life?"

Of course, my knee jerk reaction is "Why, me, of course." Can you say denial? I would love to believe that I am in control of my own life but sometimes it gets so foggy that I am all over the place in what I believe in. Another possible knee jerk reaction is "Bipolar Disorder". I believe that everything will be alright though.

My bipolar disorder and I are in a constant struggle. Which one of us is in charge varies by the day and hour.

Today, again, my stomach and it's talented way of making me stay up all night being sick. Yet another day of work missed.