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10/24/2010 11:35 PM

Getting frustrated.

SergeantK
SergeantKPosts: 161
Member

Still happy to say that things are going well in my life. Vania seems to be coming around more each day. I am having less and less epasodes in either direction.

Still pissed off about my Pdoc and the shit that he pulled last week. But I am fixing that.

Main frustration is in the sex department. Even tho the medication (I am assuming) has really lowered my sex drive, doesnt mean that it is not working and that I dont have one. I am going on 4 weeks now and it is really getting Frustrating. Vania continues to reject me and then later on I find that she took care of her self after I left for work or while I was sleeping. She seems to be back in the same mood that she was in when we first got married. the only differance is that she has got me totaly "cut off".

I am starting to get to the point again that "well if you wont take care of the needs I will find someone that will" And I dont want to be there. That has a lot to do witht he problems that I am trying to fix. But like so many other things she just avoids the subject.

Any sugustions?

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10/25/2010 06:54 AM
Dit
Dit  
Posts: 13741
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I'm an Advocate

You may have to seriously 'sit her down' and question what is going on. I'm not sure why she is satisfying herself and not having 'sex' with you, her husband. There may be some issues that she is not communicating with you about, you as a husband need to find some of the reasons she's doing this out.

I wish you all the best, keep us posting and we are all here for you. My poor husband for a number of yrs i pushed him off due to depression & meds, he was lucky if he got it once a month, but our sex was always fantastic. This happened more when our children were young, but now the two of us are very much sexually satified, and can't get enough of each other...so things can and do change, hang in there and keep communications open with your wife.


10/25/2010 07:02 AM
brneyegirl

I am with Dit after kiddos I literally couldn't get satified having sex. I am more relaxed and things are much better at least in that department. Communication is the only way to find out what is going on. You have to promise her that you won't be offended and let her say what she needs to. Even if it isn't what you want to hear.

10/25/2010 07:24 AM
ASO1979able
ASO1979able  
Posts: 6985
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I'm an Advocate

I used to think my husband was cheating on me, because he seemed to go from a lmost hypersexual to nothing at all seemingly overnight. I sat him down and asked why he did this and was surprised (although I shouldn't have been) by the answer . He explained to me that he just didn't want to be with me right now because he felt like he was sleeping with the guy I cheated on him with. I don't know if that's what is going on in your marriage, but if it is it takes time, patience and counseling to get things back to the way they were.

10/25/2010 08:45 AM
Joy75
Joy75  
Posts: 16598
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I'm an Advocate

This is frustrating but answers can be found in your wife. Sit her down and ask her the questions you need answered. Do this calmly so she doesn't freak out. There is no reason she should be pleasing herself while you are there ready to go. It doesn't make sense to me. She loves you, she's getting back to the way she was, what's the dealio, right? I hope she comes around and gives you some answers at least. It might not be what you are wanting to hear, but at least you will hear some kind of reason. This way you can work on it. Your therapy session is coming up soon and you two can work on this while you are at that. Take care and I hope you get your answers soon.
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