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sarahtroy Posts: 12167
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OK, YOU ASKED FOR IT, SKEPTICAL, BFLY, BOBO, SCOOBY, BANGBANG, SO HERE IT IS: Did you hear about the veterinarian who was barred from performing any surgery because he suffered from bouts of epilepsy? The cops busted him for attempting to operate on a sick predatory bird but the case was thrown out on a technicality. It was an ill eagle surgeon seizure. Bipolar II, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Panic Attacks, Agoraphobia & PTSD; Alcoholic in recovery since 3/21/07.
Aplenzin 522mg; Pristiq 200mg; Lamictal 400mg; Geodon 160mg; Ativan 1mg TID; Deplin 15mg; Xanax PRN; Metoprol 100mg.
• "Don't give up 5 minutes before the miracle happens."
• "My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet." ~Edith Wharton
• "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Ian MacLaren (Usually mis-attributed to Plato)
• "And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." ~Anais Nin
My support and advice is not a replacement for medical diagnosis, treatment, or professional medical advice.
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uppitywoman Posts: 42362
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That is an LOL and a groan at the same time! With God, all things are possible
My blog:
http://uppitywomantwo.blogspot.com
Bipolar I
10mg Abilify--400mg Lamictal-90mg Cymbalta--25mg Ambien CR--200mg Topomax--30mg Temazapam--1mg Ativan as needed.
Please note that I am not a psychiatrist or psychologist. My opinions are personal only. This site is not intended to be a substitution for professional care, nor is anyone here qualified to make diagnoses. |
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scooby64 Posts: 268
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Dr. Murray Banks, the psychiatrist who wrote "What to do until the psychiatrist arrives," said that it is medically impossible to get an ulcer when you are laughing! In one group I attended, we all lay down on the floor and put our heads on the belly of the person next to us...and, know what, everybody started laughing and without abandon! Diagosed with bipolar in 1985, I'm learning to deal with it better since finding my "family" at Alcoholics Anonymous, and as of 1/3/2013, I will have one year of sobriety and more clarity than I've ever experienced in my lifetime. |
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scooby64 Posts: 268
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When I was in court reporting school, one person was asked the definition of "illegal." To which Susan responded, "Why, a sick bird, of course!" Diagosed with bipolar in 1985, I'm learning to deal with it better since finding my "family" at Alcoholics Anonymous, and as of 1/3/2013, I will have one year of sobriety and more clarity than I've ever experienced in my lifetime. |
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sarahtroy Posts: 12167
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    _______________________________________ Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell? Yeah, it cracked me up! . Bipolar II, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Panic Attacks, Agoraphobia & PTSD; Alcoholic in recovery since 3/21/07.
Aplenzin 522mg; Pristiq 200mg; Lamictal 400mg; Geodon 160mg; Ativan 1mg TID; Deplin 15mg; Xanax PRN; Metoprol 100mg.
• "Don't give up 5 minutes before the miracle happens."
• "My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet." ~Edith Wharton
• "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Ian MacLaren (Usually mis-attributed to Plato)
• "And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." ~Anais Nin
My support and advice is not a replacement for medical diagnosis, treatment, or professional medical advice. |
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sarahtroy Posts: 12167
Group Leader
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4TH OF JULY JOKES   What happened as a result of the Stamp Act? The Americans licked the British! What ghost haunted King George III? The spirit of ‘76! Did you hear about the cartoonist in the Continental Army? He was a Yankee doodler! Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington? Because the horse was too heavy to carry! What would you get if you crossed a patriot with a small curly-haired dog? Yankee Poodle! Bipolar II, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Panic Attacks, Agoraphobia & PTSD; Alcoholic in recovery since 3/21/07.
Aplenzin 522mg; Pristiq 200mg; Lamictal 400mg; Geodon 160mg; Ativan 1mg TID; Deplin 15mg; Xanax PRN; Metoprol 100mg.
• "Don't give up 5 minutes before the miracle happens."
• "My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet." ~Edith Wharton
• "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Ian MacLaren (Usually mis-attributed to Plato)
• "And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." ~Anais Nin
My support and advice is not a replacement for medical diagnosis, treatment, or professional medical advice. |
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scooby64 Posts: 268
Member
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Did you hear about the teacher who put two glasses on his desk, filled one with pure alcohol and the other with water, then he put worms in both glasses. He looked to the class and said, "Now, what did this prove?" A hand shot up in the back of the room and said, "Gee, teacher, I guess if I drink I won't get worms, will I?" Diagosed with bipolar in 1985, I'm learning to deal with it better since finding my "family" at Alcoholics Anonymous, and as of 1/3/2013, I will have one year of sobriety and more clarity than I've ever experienced in my lifetime. |
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Bangbang Posts: 6069
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A hunter kills a deer and brings it home. He decides to clean and serve the venison for supper. He knows his kids are fussy eaters, and won't eat it if they know what it is - so he does not tell them. His little boy keeps asking him, "What's for supper?" "You'll see", says his dad. They start eating supper and his daughter keeps asking what they're eating. "Ok," says her dad, "here's a hint, its what your mother sometimes calls me." "We're eating asshole!!", she screams You are not drunk unless you have to hang on while lying on the floor. |
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sarahtroy Posts: 12167
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DISORDER IN THE COURTThese are actual quotes, word for word from court records: Q: What is the date of birth? A: July fifteenth. Q: What year? A: Every year. _____________________________________________ Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? A: Gucci sweats and Reebocs. _____________________________________________ Q: This myasthenia gravis - does it affect you memory at all? A: Yes. Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory? A: I forget. Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten? _____________________________________________ Q: All your responses must be oral, ok? What school did you go to? A: Oral. _____________________________________________ Q: How old is your son - the one living with you? A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which. Q: How long has he lived with you? A: Forty-five years. _____________________________________________ Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning? A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?" Q: And why did that upset you? A: My name is Susan. ____________________________________________ Q: Did you blow your horn or anything? A: After the accident? Q: Before the accident. A: Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it. ____________________________________________ Post edited by: sarahtroy, at: 07/07/2012 04:00 PM Bipolar II, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Panic Attacks, Agoraphobia & PTSD; Alcoholic in recovery since 3/21/07.
Aplenzin 522mg; Pristiq 200mg; Lamictal 400mg; Geodon 160mg; Ativan 1mg TID; Deplin 15mg; Xanax PRN; Metoprol 100mg.
• "Don't give up 5 minutes before the miracle happens."
• "My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet." ~Edith Wharton
• "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Ian MacLaren (Usually mis-attributed to Plato)
• "And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." ~Anais Nin
My support and advice is not a replacement for medical diagnosis, treatment, or professional medical advice. |
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scooby64 Posts: 268
Member
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You are spectacular...and you made my day. Hugs Diagosed with bipolar in 1985, I'm learning to deal with it better since finding my "family" at Alcoholics Anonymous, and as of 1/3/2013, I will have one year of sobriety and more clarity than I've ever experienced in my lifetime. |
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