Mixma posted this a few months ago, it's back ... !
A letter from a college student to her parents after she moves into the dorms.
Dear Mom and Dad,
It has now been three months since I left for college. I have been remiss in writing this and I am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in not having written before. I will bring you up to date now but before you read on, please sit down. Okay?
Well then, I am getting along pretty well, now. The skull fracture and concussion I got when I jumped out of the window of my dorm when it caught fire shortly after my arrival are pretty well healed now. I only spent two weeks in the hospital. Now I can see almost normally and only get these sick headaches once a day.
Fortunately the fire in the dormitory and my jump were witnessed by an attendant at the gas station near the dorm. He was the one who called the fire department and the ambulance. He also visited me at the hospital and since I had nowhere to live because of the burned out dorm, he was kind enough to invite me to share his apartment with him. It's really a basement room, but it's kind of cute. He is a very fine boy and we have fallen deeply in love and are planning to get married. We haven't set the exact date yet, but it will be before my pregnancy begins to show.
Yes, mother and dad, I am pregnant. I know how much you are looking forward to being grandparents and I know you will welcome the baby and give it the love and devotion and tender care you gave me as a child. The reason for the delay in our marriage is that my boyfriend has some minor infection which is preventing us from passing the premarital blood tests.
I know you will welcome him into our family with open arms. He is kind and although now well educated, he is ambitious, and I'm confident that he's licked his deinking problem. As soon as he gets out of jail, we'd like you to come and visit.
Now that I have brought you up to date, i want to tell you that there was NO dormitory fire. I did NOT have a concussion or a skull fracture. I was NOT in the hospital. I am NOT pregnant. I am NOT engaged and there is NO man in my life. However, I am getting a 'D' in history and an 'F' in science, and I wanted you to see those marks in the proper perspective!
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