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Bipolar Type II Support Group Bipolar Type II
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A community of patients, family members and friends dedicated to dealing with Bipolar Type II, together.
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Bipolar II Community Bipolar II Support Forums Introductions & Personal Stories not new to bipolar disorder but new here
 

not new to bipolar disorder but new here


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05/03/2008 20:43
frustrated
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 My name is Pamela and I found this site to find others who feel the way I do. I was diagnosed approx. 5 years ago. Have been off of meds for three years and did wonderful. I'm now back in therapy and soon to get a new psych eval done. It will be of great comfort to me just to read how others of you are coping. I have not had to focus much on myself in this respect in those few years, symptoms were mild, and am now strongly reminded of this disorder and how torterous it is.

I hope to make a few friends and a place I can come when no one else understands.
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05/04/2008 01:49
cats4me59
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 been there for years, have to take alot of meds to keep mine under control, then it still rears its ugly head sometime. sometimes i wonder am i the person whose meds work or am i really this person when meds aren't working. have gone from 300mlg neurontin daily 150 effexor, lorazepam to 4000 mlg a day of neurontin and 600mlg depakot, 40mlg Prozac and right now am still in cycling stage that started about 6 months ago. take your meds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! can't say that strongly enough. i have no family who understands this, they seem to tolerate me. think i am making it up. no support. i joined this site in hopes as well, to find others who understand.
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05/04/2008 02:16
lonewolf

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 welcome to thr site we are here to support you and anyone else and also help if we can

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05/04/2008 02:52
cats4me59
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 my name is doris. not only am i bipolar but also have fibromyalgia, and multi-joint arthiritis, along with small host of other medical problems. but i work 2 jobs. bus driver and paraprofessional at school. am afraid if i retire on disability that i will give up and die. also, my 26 yr old daughter along w/her 3 yr old daughter, 20 month old daughter, and 4 month old daughter live w/me. she is trying to go back to school to be able to support hers, thanks to dead beat dad. sometimes, there is no escape.
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05/04/2008 03:03
lonewolf

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 Hi Doris

Right now I am semi retired and I am waiting to go to scool for wood working with the states help but in the mean time I spend my time refinishing furniture and writing alot at this site I have found that if I write my journal in the forum of a poem it helps me so I have found different hobbys to fill my time and yes there are day I don't do any thing but that is to be expected right now I am unable to do much because I had back surgery so I don't a whole heck of alot right now but I do try to find things to keep me busy so don't give up hope see if the state will help your daughter and you it can't hurt to try
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05/04/2008 03:34
cats4me59
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 hey you definitely need to take care of your physical health as well as your mental . i work to keep sane. i am married, but my husband doesn't get it at all. he is not mean or anything, he is just here. we are on the verge of him leaving, at my request, but it is just another failure to me. was married before, to a drug abuser, and who was abusive to me. had both ends of the spectrum. can't seem to make it work. guess it is juse me. think real love for a bipolar is maybe impossible. people just can't (or won't) give what it takes to be with me. seems to be so choatic, right now wish just could find a tiny black hole that i fit into, and hide from the world.
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05/04/2008 09:32
frustrated
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 Thanks for the comforting words. I literally walked around since I was a teen with bp. When I was married to my first husband I was prescribed Prozac, once given the pill and told it was pms. It literally destroyed my first marriage. I up and left him 4 times before I finally let him go, not wanting to put him through it anymore.

I have two children. My son is 18 and will graduate this month and move to his dads and go to college. My daughter is 14 and luckily staying here with me. I have a wonderful husband who even wrote a research paper on bp in college to better understand my situation. God bless him! He is very supportive.

After three years of doing great I started having some manic episodes again. I'm sure due to becoming ill and it taking 6 months to diagnose. My son leaving has taken me for a loop. And to top it off my husband leaves in two weeks for a 10 week internship and I'm scared to be without him. He and my father (also bp) are my support system.

I decided two months ago to be proactive and go back to therapy and get back on meds. I can't afford to ruin my marriage or lose my job, seeing that I am supporting four of us while my husband is going to school.

I was prescribed once meds for the mania and only took them for a week. After reading the horrible side effects I quit taking them. I have always felt for the most part that my mania is what keeps me successful at work (high energy, creative, efficient, you all know what I'm talking about). I have decided to face reality and succomb to a mood stabilizer. Was anyone else scared at the thought of taking them?? I'm terrified I won't be the same person.
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05/04/2008 13:49
cats4me59
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 i was terrified. my doc said to read about all the different meds and side effects, and then we would discuss treatment. at first, i didn't want to take any of them. we finally decided on neurontin, and effexor. i started at extremely small doses, but very quickly had to increase dosages. finally after about 1 1/2 years, and steady increases, my doc wanted me to try trilipel not sure am spelling right, but it created severe headaches and more severe depression. so back to neurontin and a stronger dose. then switched docs, and this one wanted me to take lithium, but it also made me worse. so back to neurontin. this was all over a period of aBOUT 6 1/2 YEARS. had to try Seroquel, that made me crazy, almost like a pyschotic episode. finally added depakote. now for about 2 years have been on 800mlg nerontin 5 times daily and 150 mlg depakote 4 times daily, and need prozac off and on for depression. have had no weird side effects other than just loses effective after period of time. when i take properly (sometimes I forget dose when hurried) i do well and seem to be fairly "normal". i try not to miss a dose because it is important to take it as prescribed. it actually helps me be a better same person. yes it calms the mania but in a good way. i definitely say try the meds. thru trial and error, but no serious side effects, i have found what works for me, at least for time being.
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