New Here

I'm not sure why I even came here, as I'm not the type of person that openly talks about my issues, but then again I think most people here would be of the same mind. I gues the reason though is because I'm a bit upset right now....and I assume people with the same issues as mine would be better to talk to than my wife....who doesn't really understand what bipolar is. All she knows is what the media talks about...violent mood swings. She usually tells me to take my pills....which gets me even more worked up. Recently she went to a meeting for spouses of people with bipolar (right after her anger management class lol) and came back with a bit more knowledge of the issue. But when I asked her what was talked about she tells me, "Well some of the things I thought you were being an asshole about I found out wasn't really in your ability to control."

It took her 1 class to figure that out? I've only been telling her for 8 years. I mean how many other people (besides yourself or family members with bipolar) do you know that can go to highschool, hold a part time job, and STILL get 13hrs of sleep or more a day? I don't know to many. But yeah....I'm an asshole.

Once my wife attends more of these classes I assume my marraige will get a bit better. Currently....my wife is my trigger. And its not her fault. She has anger management issues, so when I start cycling into a low swing, she returns the attitude, and it starts to escalate. By the time I'm aware of whats happening its to late. I try to leave or walk away, as I do with most things in life that start to trigger an episode. But my wifes got the anger management issue and walking away does not fly. She gets more pissed of when I try to do that, and I get more pissed off when she wont let me do it. Yeah...escalation city.

Ok so I've rambled a bit by now. I still don't know why I came to post here. But I'm no longer in a pissy mood sooooo, whatever the purpose....its been served. 1 more day without a bad cycle is always a good thing, right? One day at a time.

I am the BP in my household and I understand very well about the ups and downs and the spouse being the trigger.

One of the best things you could have done (and did) was to join one of these support groups.

I can't tell you how much my online "friends" are able to lift me up when I am down.

And, like you, sharing my experiences, with others, helps to lift my soul up and out of some of the darker times.

Anyway nice to have you around

Barry