Is there such a thing?
For my elementary school and Junior High years I don't remember how I was emotionally. In and after high school I was very depressed. No cycles, just consistent depression. This was not diagnosed.
In my 20s I got epilepsy. I have been taking Lamictal for 11 or 12 years. In my 30s I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome by a doctor I was seeing for epilepsy.
In my late 30s I took an IQ test to apply for SSD. Diagnoses: Asperger's Syndrome, dysthymic, Schizoid Personality Disorder, and LD-NOS. The only surprise wsa Schizoid Personality Disorder. When I read about it, I saw that the symptoms of it were in me, I had just thought it was all Asperger's Syndrome.
Last year I was mildly but consistently depressed. I asked for an antidepressant and it sent me into extreme depression and self-injury habits. Even off the medicine I still struggle with it.
The depression wasn't severe but it was so persistant I wanted something so that is when I asked for a mood stabalizer. He is my family doctor and is all I can afford. He handed me a prescription for Lithium, wrote bipolar type two on the paper to take in for a blood test after a couple of months and sent me on my way.
The Lithium does help. I had been alternating between severe depression and milder depression. Lithium brings my extreme lows up to milder lows. And my highs are just normal moods that everyone has. But I had had that some of the time before Lithium. The councelor I was seeing couldn't do diagnosis but did see some things that looked like BP2 could be right.
It's strange. I feel so different from everyone here yet still get good advice and help. And I remember the extreme depression and temptation to self-injure I had before Lithium. A temptation which has only lessened but not stopped.
I don't have the highs or racing thoughts that people here talk about. And I did react to the antidepressant like many with BP do. I took them when I was younger. Right after high school. They did nothing. But the one I took last year, that sent me into the BP experience.
Can antidepressants cause BP? That's sort of what it feels like.
