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12/06/2010 12:38 PM

Bipolar and holidays suck!

wondering38
Posts: 3
New Member

I have been on my meds like regular (lithium and lamictal). I had a huge year of stress that could have choked a horse and got through it. Now all of a sudden, i feel like shit! blah, emotional, my battle to shop for xmas has dwindled, feel like i've done everything and hubby hasn't done anything. I did all inside decorating and he didn't finish outside.

i'm tired...

i'd like to get into bed, pull my blanket over me (tears in my eyes as i'm writing this. i hate this. i was doing well for so long and now, not!

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12/06/2010 06:02 PM
Joy75
Joy75  
Posts: 16597
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

MissHildy is right, a lot of work does go into the holidays. You may be wearing yourself out. You have done a lot of things so far and your husband hasn't done much at all and that has got to be frustrating. Try to pace yourself. Take a break for now and just try to relax. You can get to other things later. Maybe call your psychiatrist to see if he can help you out through this hard time you are having. I'm sure he would. You have been doing very well and now all of the sudden you have come to a halt, but maybe some of that stress you were handling so well has caught up to you. Just try to take it easy and don't do too much. We are here for you so lean on us.I'm glad you are reaching out to us. You will find a lot of support here. Also, you will learn a lot from other members and you can share your stories and ask questions. I'm happy you joined. Welcome to the group!

Post edited by: Joy75, at: 12/06/2010 06:03 PM


12/06/2010 07:22 PM
illonasophia
illonasophiaPosts: 149
Member

Holidays are so difficult especially since it supposed to be such a special family time.

Post edited by: illonasophia, at: 01/07/2011 12:42 AM


12/07/2010 04:46 AM
wondering38
Posts: 3
New Member

Thanks so much to all of you. On top of everything, my baby had a stomach virus, which went to hubby and now I'm petrified that the others or myself will get it. I don't do well with throw-up and he's completely useless. He'll go and get sick at the sight of it and I get major anxiety. This is another added stress that I worry about. I feel so tired. I'm up at 5am, drive an hour to work, come home and do the routine etc. I hate whining. I am almost to the point of calling my therapist who I haven't seen in over a year. I was so proud that I survived this year.

Here's the story back in Feb we made plans to get married, my parents made a huge issue that they wanted to be there. It was supposed to be just us. We adjusted our plans to appease them. Wedding was for August 10 hours away, where they live. In May I found out his divorce never went through. he thought the ex took care of it. I just about wanted to smack him in his face. Then that was taken care of. Not even 2 weeks before wedding he couldn't find his birth certificate and had to order one asap. We headed north and stayed with my parents a few days. One of the days, the parents were to watch the kids so we could get license (5 hours away). On our way back I got phone calls constantly and came back to a mess. We traveled to the beach, which took longer than it was supposed to. Out of 3 days there I worked more than ever. Had to deal with my parents critizing about my 7 yr old son (ADHD) on his behavior once he's off his meds at night time. I wound up doing laundry the day of wedding and listened to comments and had no help with that. When I came back with flowers, cake etc it was 11am and loudly said today is the wedding why is everyone sleeping??? We were getting married at 6pm. They shuffled out of bed and were upset we woke them up. They were supposed to take kids to the beach, so I could have time to make my own bouquet. My son was supposed to give the rings on the beach, but mom never gave them to him and he had a fit on the beach (med wore off). The parents were to watch the kids for 2 lousy hours so we could walk on the beach by ourself. They threw a fit and we got into the most horrible fight I ever had. She made comments about hubby and step-son, let my secrets out (went into hosp and she blamed them). The kids were petrified of what happened. We took them out of where we were staying and walked on the beach. When we came back (1 hour later). they were gone. I didn't talk to them for 6 weeks and then got roped in again. They played their usual card of medical issues and

they're worried about themselves. I gave sympathy... My hubby refuses to talk to them, can't blame him - but it stresses me more, because mom won't leave me alone about why he won't get on the phone. I told her why, you made accusations about me and ruined our wedding. Too much more... my head's beginning to hurt.


12/07/2010 05:00 AM
skullhappy
skullhappy  
Posts: 743
Member

I think the holidays suck, bipolar or not.....but I'm more of a Halloween person!

12/07/2010 05:22 AM
wondering38
Posts: 3
New Member

Halloween is my fav! What sucks is when your other half, takes over, because it's his fav too. I now no longer decorate because he drives me crazy.

12/07/2010 06:51 AM
getfitwithjohn
 
Posts: 224
Member

wondering

it is time to take control back. Your parents are master manipulators, i have a pair of those as well.as for hubby, you decided to marry him, there must be some good there. find that good again, you need to. the stepson, step it up keep him on the meds, fight with the doc, he is too young to be his advocate.As for the littler bundle of joy, you need to make this reassesment for their sake, what if your stepson's rage turns to the baby.

i am not trying to be negative or judgmental, these are the fact. You need a personal plan, otherwise they will not be resolved and you will still be miserable.Your parents, can be put on a back burner. Disconnect your answering machine, do not answer cell when they come up, just cut communication for a while, their illnesses will still be there in a month or two.Time to get back to your therapist to either help formulate your plan or to approve and help tweak your plan.i find having a written plan to be a help, even if there is just one thing done in a day, it is a success. start with small stuff and build. Get your hubby to the therapist with you even if it is once a month or have a threeway conversation with him on speaker phone with you and the therapist. Your step son needs a good doc. if a therapist is not on your budget or insurance plan use the school. A little know fact, they have counselors, support staff, doctors and access to free or very low cost medications.

Seems like alot to do, I know, i have been there. I had a dying father in law, an ill father, a demented mother in law ( in laws lived with us) and a young child. my wife is an executive and rarely home.it was all my problem and bp was in the mix. take care of yourself, tackle each of them at a time. i gave my sisters my dad, my wife's siblings her parents and concentrated on my daughter. eventually i wook charge of everything, but it was on my terms.

rediscover yourself. once you know yourself , moving forward will get easier, trust me , it has for me and my life was a mess.

my prayer and wish for you is peace.this is the perfect season to let go of trappings and find your inner self. the gifts will get bought and wrapped and so what if xmas dinner is cosco chicken and frozen vegies. you are all together,isn't that what this is about you and your little nuclear family?

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