Bipolar Type II Support Group

In a nutshell, I’m having a hard time forgetting my painful past. The guys didn’t like me growing up. Others say they have gone through the same thing, but this has hurt me to the core.

I don’t know if I was too dark, my nose too big, hair not long enough, too short or what. The guys didn’t always tell me.

I cried last year while I watched a young man go to a girls house to take her to the prom because no one asked me.

OK it’s 28 years after high school, and I’ve been married 18 years.

It does not make me feel good to know that 1 person out of millions think I’m attractive. What if, heaven forbids, he dies or divorces me? Then what/ What if I decide I want to get remarried/ Since only 1 person thinks I’m cute, then I guess I’m in trouble.

OK. Now—our marriage is good. We are intimate and we enjoy each other and our 4 kids.

I just want to know FOR SURE that I am attractive to other men, then I’ll feel better and move on That’s all. I don’t want to have an affair.

Think about this... How will you ever know for sure?

I've asked God about his..I gues a genuine smile from strangers (who have nothing to gain or lose by telling the truth) that say "You know, you're a nice-looking woman!" Then hopefully after enough compliments, I'd eventually believe it.

It sound to me like more of an inner problem than an outer problem. By this I mean you will look to other how you look to yourself. If you see yourself as ugly, the lack of confidence will show through and others are likely to shy away from you. Do you have a therapist? If so then maybe you should discuss this with them. Often is self-esteem is good then our physical appearance doesn't matter. Again I say, go to your therapist or find a good one. These are clearly deep issues you need to work through. In the mean time try to focus on the fact that at least one person though you were beautiful enough to mary.

I have a psychiatrist. he is very nice and kind. he tells me over and over that I'm attractive and I wouldn't have trouble attracting guys.. But, the 27 yr old from last yr doesn't call to say hello, my massage therapist was a no call no show twice, not to mention Billy Bob, and others through out my teens who wouldn't give me the time of day, although I'm nice and friendly.

Perhaps your more recent crushs are unresponsive because you are married with four kids. Good men don't fool around with married women...

You should have a psychologist, A psychiatrist only handles meds etc. A psychologist does talk therapy and verbal support face to face. I think there is no amount of guys to say you are beautiful that will be enough. It has to come from you, your reality is what YOU see.

Hi.

I do not want to mess around or have an affair. If I had a few compliments, I might feel better. I also compliment people (sincerely) quite often on hair, clothes, etc..Not every one in passing would know I was married, anyway.

I just hope I'll get better soon. this is the 2nd day I've been crying.

If you knew 2 women casually maybe the 3 of you are coworkers. Would you treat the woman you found physically attractive any differently than the other female coworker? This is assuming both are nice to you.

Would there be any way the cute woman would know you thought she was cute, or you wouldn't treat or any differently?

my mother says that it's possible folks may think I look nice, but don't say anything. I can believe people would be mean to someone who they thought was physically attractive?? (I go out of my way to be nice to people--i don't want to "give' anyone a reason not to like me1) So, the only reason would have to be my looks if I'm good to these guys, right? What else could be wrong with me???