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05/10/2010 06:58 AM

Just Diagnosed

gwk
Posts: 7
New Member

I thought I was cyclothymic, by new new pdoc just diagmosed me as Bipolar II. I'm wondering if I should tell friends/family members or not? My mother is 89, and probably doesn't need to find out about this at this point in her life? She know I've had problems with depressuon in the past, but Bipolar Disorder sounds more serious than depression.Thanks.
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05/10/2010 07:03 AM
FatherKarras
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It's all in how you look at it, and everyone looks at it slightly different.

For me, I look at it as an intregal part of who I am, and I'm not ashamed by it. Others are.

Let it stew for a while, and then do what you think is best.


05/10/2010 07:05 AM
Van

GWK, I was diagnosed a few years ago at age 51( now 54). I blabbed it to everyone, and it hurt me bad. Only tell a few close friends at first that you TRUST.Now I am stable and tell those in my circle of friends. I am Bipolar 1 and fight depression and mania. It is a very manageable illness. I take my meds on time, go to a psychiatrist, and a therapist. Hope this helps, Van

05/10/2010 08:28 AM
Joy75
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Hi, that's all in who you feel comfortable telling. People can be really harsh and say stuff. So it's all up to you. I don't care who knows, but that's because I'm personally not ashamed and am trying to kill the stigma. Tell those you feel comfortable with or tell no one at all, that's a personal decision. Hugs

05/10/2010 09:40 AM
venusenvynyc
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It depends on your family and friends. How did they react to your depression? Did they encourage you to seek help, or assume you could "get over it" by just willing yourself to do so? If they reacted supportively to the depression, it may not be much different with the new diagnosis.

I can tell you think bipolar is much worse; just take care that you don't present it as such to them. This isn't terminal cancer, so don't make it sound so grave. The truth is it was probably always "really" bipolar, except you hadn't noticed the up-side of it yet. Honestly, since my hypomanias tend to be pleasant, I think I got off lighter than someone who is just stuck in depression all the time.

On the other hand, some people are incapable of viewing you as a person with a mental illness; they'll view you as your illness first and a person second. Those people have no right to know about your diagnosis.

It's not a matter of shame, it's a matter of having the right to live a life free of harassment. At my job, our last office manager was fired due to what appeared to me to be symptoms of bipolar. I feel no obligation to tell my bosses about my diagnosis.

Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference between who will accept and who won't. For me, I tend to err on the side of caution. If you don't tell someone now, over time you can gather clues about their views on mental illness. For example, you could bring up some news item about mental illness in general, so it's not about you personally, and see how they react.

You can always tell them later. But if you tell someone and end up regretting it, there's no way to take that information back.

That said, this advice applies more to coworkers, bosses, family, people who you have to have in your life whether they're being nice to you or not. All my close friends know about my diagnosis. If they can't accept that part of me, there's no reason for me to choose to spend time with them.


05/10/2010 10:47 AM
gwk
Posts: 7
New Member

Thanks to all of you who responded so quickly! I've only told 1 close friend so far. I've thought about telling my current boss (he's actually someone I graduated high school with, but now his main role is my boss rather than a friend). I thought it might help explain my unacceptable behavior that got me into trouble with my former boss (same company and same department) when I was hypomanic. I've only worked for my current boss for 5 months and I've been depressed the whole time, taking at least one sick day or 1 vacation day a week. Thanks again for all of the feedback!

05/10/2010 11:03 AM
MissStacey
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Welcome! I feel you should tell whoever you are comfortable with telling. As for your mother if you feel you should just leave it as Depression due to her age that may be a good idea. That also is up to you. I'm glad you have found us, this is a very supportive group you will get alot of comfort and support here. You are not alone here. Good luck! Wink

05/10/2010 11:13 AM
FatherKarras
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I will say that I tried to tell my 87-yo gran, and now she thinks I'm bisexual. Sick Ermm

Post edited by: FatherKarras, at: 05/10/2010 11:14 AM


05/10/2010 11:31 AM
dizzyb
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05/10/2010 11:39 AM
MissStacey
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Lmao....sorry but that's funny Patrick! Smile
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