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07/12/2008 11:11 PM

Fatigue and Family

cpm650
 
Posts: 3
New Member

I was diagnosed with type II six years ago. It took three years of experimentation to come up with the right doctors, therapy and drugs. It was all worth it. I feel so much better.

But I'm tired from the meds. "You sleep too much," my wife says. "Are you going to take those forever?" I'm asked when I say it's the medicine that slows me down and bulks me up. I know the side effects are worth how I feel. "It's a chronic medical condition," I want to yell at them.

How to cope? How to get support, understanding and help rather than criticism?

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07/12/2008 11:25 PM
morningglory/oldglory
glory  
Posts: 3668
VIP Member

Hi cpm and welcome. All I can suggest is ask her to read & study & and try to absorb all the info she can about the disease. Been married to hubby 12 yrs and he still gets surprised when I have him read something that I haven't told him before. He will say Oh that's why you.....(whatever it is)... or is she just not interested in knowing?

07/13/2008 04:48 PM
cpm650
 
Posts: 3
New Member

It may be imperfect perception, but I sense anger in her at the loss of the hypo-manic over achiever she once had. I would like to think that the relief of my dark times would make her happy, but even in the years preceding my diagnosis, I sensed a heavy, what-does-this-mean-to-me attitude. I do love my wife very much. She supported me by not leaving me. Am I asking too much now that she accept me for who I've become?

07/14/2008 02:19 AM
carmen33
carmen33  
Posts: 8702
VIP Member

Hi, cpm, and welcome, it's tough when trying to figure out why a person reacts like they do to changes in us, especially when they are for the good.

I believe your perception on the loss of the over achiever might just be on the mark. Did you work a lot of over time and stuff then? Educating yourself and her on this disorder is the best way to help her understand and help yourself learn more about it..


07/14/2008 09:11 PM
cpm650
 
Posts: 3
New Member

Thank you for the advice. Yes, I did work more overtime and also accomplished more home improvement as well. (Infinitely more since I don't do either anymore.) But I remember the deep, dark, suicidal depressions too. I had concluded my wife either didn't care about the depressive episodes, or thought they were worth having. This is, perhaps, a bad conclusion? Advice of late says to educate. Thanks again.

07/14/2008 09:23 PM
morningglory/oldglory
glory  
Posts: 3668
VIP Member

Cpm, please don't discount that people change. People and marriages become complacent. The fact is, maybe the problem has nothing to do with Bipolar at all. Talk to your wife rather than guess what is going on with her. Maybe the change has been you and she has stayed where she was. Have some meaningful communication with her & perhaps even some marriage counseling is in order.
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