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05/22/2008 19:15
clevergirl
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hee hee!

I'm not patient, Norma...and I feel guilty for being sick - but I will try - I got out on the 9th...how much more do you think I have? Can't afford counseling now - with the job and insurance situation...but my husband showed some interest in a local DBSA families of BP support group (free!). I think I need to make a date for the two of them...you don't think she's too young, do you? 14?

Teenagers suck.

failure is a prerequisite to success
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05/22/2008 19:18
illectronic
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In 8th grade I was an A+ student. As long as she stays away from the wrong crowd high school and college she should be fine. I'm 23, bipolar since 9th grade. Sometimes I also lack confidence and motivation. Does she exercise? I know she isn't the one that's diagnosed bipolar (you do know it's hereditary), but exercise helps me gain confidence in many ways. I look better, I get runner's high(I'm an addict so this is good), and sometimes I meet cool people at the gym.

As for you... don't be so hard on yourself. We bipolar's are overly humble and always think we didn't do well enough. Life is too short to worry about all this BS.

Your husband being an addict is not really setting a good example IMHO. But at least it's only pot. Once I did more then pot, the shit hit the fan.

Hang in there.

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05/22/2008 19:20
illectronic
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I'd also like to say as much as my mother was always very caring and supportive of me, I wish I would have been forced to do more chores and become more independent earlier on. Seriously.
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05/22/2008 19:21
norma
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No 14 is a good age...and it will make her feel like she is getting some attention...did you consider maybe her way of getting attention is under-acheiving? Even negative attention is attention.

I know what you mean about not being patient...I want everything solved NOW...LOL it never works out that way...

"In the time of your life, live-so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but, shall smile to the infinite variety and mystery of it." William Saroyan



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05/22/2008 19:28
clevergirl
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illectronic - nice to hear your perspective...I agree, and since I'm twenty-four years from high school, your reflections are quite valuable. I'm having trouble forcing chores without a war of nasty faces, slamming doors and stomping...which is a 'trigger' for me.

Thanks, Norma - good thing for Dad and her to do together. You're right about the negative attention is better than none. I'd give that advice myself. Funny how we never listen to our own advice. Starbucks date soon...if I can ever get up the energy to shower and leave the house. My PDoc asked if I had agoraphobia - I said no, just lazy and depressed. LOL - I just can't bring myself to take the time on myself to look presentable before I leave the house. What's up with that?! Can anyone say TANGENT??

failure is a prerequisite to success
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05/22/2008 19:32
illectronic
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Clevergirl, I am also lazy and mildly depressed right now. You just need to force yourself out. I was just at the gym for the first time in a while and it felt good. Once you get out and see that everything is O.K. you will be fine. It is defiantly not agoraphobia.

About the trigger thing... oh boy. One of mine is when people tell me I can't do something. COuld be anything. I just got enraged when my dad told me to stop talking but I held it back wonderfully and kept my cool. Try to get out of the house and gain confidence. It could be something as simple as taking a walk. Once you gain the confidence, there can be a new sherrif in town.

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05/22/2008 19:33
zinnia
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some saturdays, we have "jammie day" where the kids and i stay in our jammies all day and watch movies. they think it's for them but it's really because i don't feel like getting dressed to go anywhere or do anything...lol...you're not lazy, just down. you just got out of the hospital. give yourself a break dearest one.
Well behaved women rarely make history.

Thou canst not disturb a flower without the troubling of a star...from "Troubling a Star", by Madelaine L'Engle...we all affect one another by our words and actions...it is our choice whether to do so purposefully and positively, or carelessly and hurtfully...may we all bring to one another the peace that we seek...

"if you want others to be happy, practice compassion. if you want to be happy, practice compassion" the Dahli Laama
Peace-
Zinnia

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05/22/2008 19:35
norma
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Here is some hope...my under-achiever finally graduated with a Degree in International Business from LSU...and is a Second Lieutenant in the Army...when she was a teenager she skipped school so much she didn't get to walk in graduation...had to go to summer school to finish. And she finally grew out of the green hair dying fetish...

Teenagers are just weird...I can remember being one myself back in the stoned age...the 60's LOL

"In the time of your life, live-so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but, shall smile to the infinite variety and mystery of it." William Saroyan



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05/22/2008 19:36
dragonfly2catch
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clevergirl just remember even though you are bipolar you are and always will be her mom and that will never change i like what you said about the apartment across the way and finishing school there that made me chuckle i think all parents feel that way at times i have a 19 year old that knows it all but he does not live with me.i have a 14 and a 13 year old boys and let me tell ya about triggers and im not bipolar my fiance is and those teens can get me goin so i cant imagine bein bipolar and dealing with it trust me..love love and more love heals all but trust me i know as parents we wanna choke them more than hug them half the time lol.so remember you are more normal than you think bein a parent is hard no matter what but what is beautiful about you is you see what is happening around you and that is half the battle kiddo...be blessed :~dragonfly
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05/22/2008 19:37
illectronic
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Ah, I did not pick up that you just got out of the hospital. Take it easy for a while and don't rush into things too fast is the best advice I can give. I was hospitalized plenty of times.
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