Bipolar Support Group

The best term for how i feel, is "cocktailed."

My psych meds are Depakote, Prozac, and Welbutrin.

I am on two very strong antibiotics, and still have remnants of an IV, for staph infection.

I have a sore throat now, but my ankle(injury) is better. the sore throat makes me worried I should go back to the hospital tomorrow morning.

I spent a month working through a lot of grief and anger. An even-ness, peace and calm, I attained for a while, is all but gone. I am very angry. I don't have exercise in my life right now, and can't release bad feelings like i did.

i'm still scared of getting sicker, physically and mentally here.

Flaco - I don't blame you for being angry tootsie... but BREATHE!

Your stability will return hun, you just gotta give it a little time. Ride this out - all you can do is hope it doesn't last too long. What sucks is that you're immobilized, so THINKING TOO MUCH is pretty inevitable, and I know what it's like... once you START thinking too much, it's kinda tough to STOP or even SLOW IT DOWN!! What can you do around the house to occupy your mind a little bit???

AND - I think if your gut says to go back to the E.R., you should go ahead and do it... Better safe than sorry.

Keep venting if you need to - as long as you're getting it all out here, I'm glad, because I know it's not just swirling around in your head and getting all stuck in your system!!! I'm here for you.....

Post edited by: kimminentdanger, at: 09/12/2008 18:19

One more thing as an afterthought: You can still move your ARMS, right??? If exercise is a big stress reliever for you, can you grab some dumbbells and do a few reps of curls or chest presses from a sitting position? I know it's not quite the same thing, but it's SOMETHING....

Post edited by: kimminentdanger, at: 09/12/2008 18:23

Thanks, I can do that stuff. The tough part is seeing all of the stuff that went up in smoke this week, and may next week. Times like these I can also get psychosomatic, and convince myself i'm getting worse, or that a possible cold, or allergies, are gonna kill me.

Post edited by: Flaco73, at: 09/12/2008 18:32

Flaco, you sound damn scared and disolutioned, with good reason it seems. but you all say that get pyschosomatic at these times. a viscious circle. if you know you exaggerate symptoms i think you've got a step up on the situation. you know a cold is just a cold, allergies the same.

Kim is right - breathe - don't concern yourself with what you can't change. you're laid up with the ankle - oh well. next week might be better.

take care - yell at Kim all you want

terry

it's like all the times I wanted to die have come back to haunt me.

Oh Flaco, I'm so sorry that's happening... What went up in smoke this week? I know you were in the hospital getting worked on, but I wasn't aware that something disappointing happened...????

(AND you KNOW realistically that a cold won't kill you, but if it makes you feel better, than go to the E.R. every 5 minutes if you have to. Whatever it takes to keep you from losing it is what you gotta do. Who cares if they think you're a hypochondriac? Mybe you are, temporarily, but you can only batle one thing at a time, and right now feeling stable is more important. And they'll be sending SOMEBODY a bill for services, so fuck 'em - )

Well, I kind of had a crap time in the last year with a relationship ending, and am just trying to start having fun. Two dates and a gig have gone up in smoke,because of my damn foot. The last time a reclusive shy person like me, had two dates in a week, was, oh, never. Frustrating. Postponed one. Working on other.

Post edited by: Flaco73, at: 09/12/2008 20:21

Well, the gigs being cancelled DOES suck. That's erally too bad...

BUT on the brighter side, it can really be an advantage for a guy to be sick... Most people have a genuine nurturing instinct - when you call the "potential re-date" tell them that you're laid up... chances are that they'll naturally want to help take care of you. We all know that a little chicken soup can lead to LLLOOOOVVVVEEE....

I think I rocked the "sympathy crutches," on the phone fairly smooth, with one so far. i should rest on that. I broke my back, had a psych ward stay, but had someone right there with me.

It just feels so cold and alone, right now, with a potentially fatal infection, and nobody here, and no significant other in my life. i've gotten this far, with this thing, but at some point we all break down.