Dual diagnosis

Others may have answers ...I am glad you are here. Welcome

Welcome to the group. I have bipolar 1, and rapid cycling, and have psychosis. I am a recovering alcaholic. I have been sober for almost 6 yrs, and have been medicated for 1 yr.

I went to AA all this time, and did all the steps, sponsored people, did alot of inventory, and ended up suicidal at 5 yrs sober.

I was very manic on drugs. I was depressed on alcahol, and pot.

My illness got worse as the years went by. I started rapid cycling about a year ago. I would cycle in an hour. I was terrified. I put myself in therapy, and came out bipolar. I finally surrendered.

I hit a bottom. Now it's about going to therapy, and taking meds, and working my recovery program, so, I take care of both diseases.

I have noticed, that too much caffeine can make me manic, and increase my anxiety, I have always been hypoglycemic, so, If my sugar is off, I can have an episode, too. If, I drink coffee, and eat sugar with out eating before hand, I can't sleep at night.

Anyway, hang out, this is a great place, we are here for you.

Your gonna find alot of good people here, abundant in experience and wisdom.

GOD BLESS

RED

remember one thing-you are BRAVE for facing this situation. it takes a lot!!! people here know that and will be here to support you. this site has been a life saver for me and it's gotten me through some rough times. there are people on here that i've never met in person that i consider some of my best friends. feel free to visit often, ask questions and just get some support when you need it.

peace to you on your journey.

z.

I hit bottom living on the streets of Long Beach California, selling drugs to support myself and my habits, I got to the point, I just could not do it anylonger, decided it was get sober or kill myself and i didn't have the guts to go tell my children, their mom wanted to die.

I had been busted for holding, and went to jail, when I got out of there, I was sentenced to diversion, the counselor there knew I was high the whole time I was there, but figured if I kept coming something would get planted, it did, and he was the one I turned to when it came time. He helped me find a place that would take people like me, no money, no insurance and no place to go,

I self committed to rehab, spent 90 days in their program, at the end of the first 30, I had to become self supporting, I did, and it's been going ever since. I've attended many many AA meetings and always came away with hearing something that I needed to hear, do you have a sponsor? are you working your steps, they have been a tremendous help to me.

Like you the depression was the main expression of my bipolar, unmedicated there were rages, panic attacks, anxiety, etc.. as for how long your sobriety will take? it's a life long thing, we're always just one drink away from drunk, but if you can do it, do it 24 hours at a time, I take lamictal for my bipolar, it's worked wonders for me, has me out of the black hole of depression I have lived in most of my life..

Sobriety for me, means I don't have to look behind me to see if the cops are there, I can go through a sobriety check point and not have to worry about it, I can be a responsible adult, take care of myself and those around me, I can make a commitment and actually follow through, today I can wake up and remember what it was I did last night, and don't have to worry who is the cowboy sharing my bed.

there is a Meeting planned for Sunday May 11

Zinna said something that caught my attention and pertains to this discussion and some others we have had.

She was talking about participating in my own care...I think that is so important.

I too learned all I could about the illness and medications out there during my early treatment. This may be key to staying on meds and in treatment. If you just go along with what everyone tells you with out knowing the what and why's then you may get resentful of the very people who are trying to help you. If you are participating in your treatment and medication choices you may have a tendency to continue to find the right fit for yourself both medically and therapy wise. Thus be less inclined to quit meds...ect.

I pretty much new I was bipolar years before I was diagnosed. I used alcohol thinking it would control my moods...I was wrong.

Taking both Alcohol and Bipolar a day at a time is how I got to this point...a long road...but such a good place to be.

Bipolar, on the other hand, has proven much more difficult for me to deal with. I basically did therapy and meds for a handful of months after my diagnosis and then just quit everything and ignored this problem. I'm now facing this full-boar and head on.

I don't know of a one-size fits most type of recovery program for Bipolar such as AA. My guess is because Bipolar is SO individual and incredibly complex, so naturally, the fix can't be as simple. (AA is not always easy, but it is always simple!) I do believe treatment works and that fellowship is an import part of dealing with Bipolar Disorder.

The two most important things I can say are get into a local AA program to help keep you sober forevermore and be in charge or your own Bipolar treatment. Doctors, drugs, knowledge and outreach are tools in the arsenal, but YOU have to the commander-in-chief, the leadership in the battle.

undertoe

Post edited by: undertoe, at: 05/09/2008 19:37

2/25/06 I had a mental breakdown of sorts that left me doubting my sanity and of course continuing to use allowed it to last about a year before going completely away. I now associate it with a severe manic episode accompanied with racing multiple thought of anxiety with extremepanic of a fear of going crazy with suicidal ideations. I couldn't talk with other people for help, like AA, it made me worse. I tried to blend what every one said as meaning some kind of ultimate truth and I just couldn't handle it. I stopped going to the Kingdom Hall (church) I had 2 friends and couldn't be with more than 3 at a time. I have not contacted any of my AA companions or sponsor. AA is a remarkable organization that works and it will continue to be a part of my life until the day i die. I am taking care of my spirituality and have support.

I'm getting better and feel like I'm over the hump. Just trying to get on the right meds.

Jeff