Gotta Lay Low for awhile....

You've all been so very, helpful to me since I've been coming to this site. Just in case you don't think your post was important, it was. No matter if you were bitching about the bi-polar in your home, grieving the sadness in another's life or trying to just not loose your mind, it was helpful. We are assured we are all human and need one another.

I have been faithful almost daily to read and respond to posts and personal messages from each of you. I am now enrolled and attending classes again at university, though only part time. With a new job -part time and classes, I find it very difficult to get here daily.

I want to say, I'll be around, but may be slow to respond to your posts and personal posts to me while I am busy with school and work.

THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

HUGS! HUGS! HUGS!!!

msbimbo

P.S. Mr. Bimbo was my sweet little cat's name. He died from unknown causes recently. So, I keep him alive in my pen name here.

Take care of yourself!

Erica

I am sory to hear about your cat, I can relate...

I really enjoy reading your posts,and I hope to see you again, sometime.

I am happy to see you going toward your dreams and hope you to well.

God bless you and keep you safe....Gypsy

I know exactly what you mean. I am in college too and I have like NO time between my classes, therapy, kids, there schooling, house work and just everything. I struggle to get on this site every day as well (though I LOVE this site and am blessed to have found it). I get on here when I can (which is really early in the morning or very late at night). I wish you the best of luck with your schooling. Blessed Be! Dana

How are you able to do that? and how long have you been diagnosed, and on the recovery path from Bipolar, and from that point until you started school?

Why, I am asking is, because, I just got diagnosed 5mos ago, and crashed financially and career wise, and am filing for disability, so, I can afford to go to school. I had a hard time working and keeping a job because my bipolar. I just started meds, have a case worker and a therapist and the whole thing, and have a household a relationship, kids, and the whole thing.

How did you get to the point where you could handle doing all that, and go to school??

I am all excited, to know that it is possible in the future, that I might be well enough, to do this, too. I am not the type to sit on my rear end and give up for the rest of my life and accept I will be disabled for the rest of my life, by this disorder.

Any imput would be great by anybody not just you two, LOL.....thanx,Gypsy

Post edited by: Gypsy, at: 09/13/2007 12:49

Bi-Polar is my biggest disability but I also have asthma and diabetes. My knees are also completely shot. I have cartlidge breakdown in both knee caps which makes walking VERY painful for me.

Like you, I am applying for Social Security Disability because I can't handle the stressers of a job. Hell, I can barely get out of bed some mornings let alone hold down a 40 hour a week job.

I go to school part-time only. I can't handle more then that and one of my classes I do online so i don't have to go to the college to do it (part of the agroriphobia 'sp'). I don't leave the house much.

Out of my 7 days in a week, 2 of those days I do ok as far as trying to clean house, homework, kids, bills, husband, ect. The other five, I am lucky to make it out of bed or to take a shower or whatever. My children help out a lot!!

Oh, god, I relate, I can't do much more, than handle my household, and treatment, and my four kids. You and I are so much alike. I have read your posts, and I had a bipolar dad, too.

I threatened to take off and leave my kids, for everyones benefit, etc. I was alot like you in almost every aspect of how my bipolar manifested in my life. My last Boy friend had to leave me, though, lol. I self medicated for years, too, and my ex ended up with my kids, because, I thought I was the queen of the dance clubs. I was just a bar fly, lol.

I also acted the same way in jobs and have become disabled.

I am in the beginning of rehabilitation from a severe depression, after losing my last job when I couldn't get a Taxi cab licence due to my criminal backgound. I have worked my a** off for five years to get a job, and finally gave up, and dropped mentally. So, I am waiting on my appeal right now, and in the meantime working through therapy, getting stable on meds, and have a case worker to learn coping skills for managing my bipolar.

So, I hope, someday, I will be stable enough to go to school, too. I brought this up with my case worker, and she helped me slow down and get my priorities straight. I get impatient, sometimes, and get ahead of myself. I just began getting help.

So anyway, I need to keep it symple and hang out and relax and enjoy being calm. Which is new for me. LOL. God bless...Gypsy

Post edited by: Gypsy, at: 09/14/2007 12:23

I went through hell and found myself in the hand of God as I thought I was falling into oblivion. Then the real healing began. The ability to feel and grieve all the misery of the consequences of my past and the hurts laid upon me by others, too.

It took about a year of deep, blood hound tracking down the lies I'd believed. Then the insertion of truth about myself, reprogramming so to say, came much easier than when I was still believing them.

When most of the stuff from the past was dealt with I was able to begin to live, finally!

I was still in denial about the bi-polar, but eventually I've come to grips with that, too. I pushed myself into college again full time about 4 years ago. At that time, running on mania was still very effective. I achieved wonderful GPAs and kudos from my professors. After a few semesters, I tried to add on more by taking summer courses and a part-time semi-professional job at our campus. By the time the second semester came around I was crashing and trying to bail out (minimize the damage).

It has gotten steadily worse, I cannot repair, or restore myself anymore. My grades began to fail. My student support services folks helped me get my grades taken care of and are now assisting me through the last classes.

My children are older than yours. That is a great difference in our situations. I've trained them to be self-reliant as much as possible including how to wash their clothes and cook.

I'm beginning to think I may have to look into disability if this new med does not help. I cannot work and pay back student loans if I cannot function.

In our state there is a program called Parents As Scholars. It is admistered by DHHS. It is the main reason I have been able to financially return to school.

Take care,

msbimbo