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sandunbaby
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but it said I wasn't a member anymore, so I'm introducing myself. I'm 25 years old and I was diagnosed with Bipolar/Manic depression when I was 19. I haven't taken medication or seen a doctor since then, but I have felt great and have been happy until I got married now I don't know what to do, I'm considering going to a doctor in my area, but I don't want medication, I know what my problem is and how to solve it, I just don't want to hurt my soon to be 3 year old son in the process, and to be perfectly honest the whole prospect of starting over scares the he** out of me. I know I can do it, with my family's help. I just wanted to let some steanm off and clear my head with someone who would understand and not side with me because I'm family and immediately tell me to pack up and leave. |
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oldglory
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WHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA back up.........and exactly what are you talking about when you say you don't want to hurt your 3 yr old child???????????????????????? |
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sandunbaby
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I'm talking about seperating from my husband. Don't worry I reread my post and understand how it could have been taken the wrong way. My son is my life and he keeps me going strong.
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oldglory
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Oh wow don't do that to an old fat lady...lolol Ok let's talk. I have been divorced, my daughter divorced twice, my son divorced....I know a litle about it and the causes....shoot Love Gloria |
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sandunbaby
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First of all I knew from the beginning of the relationship it was a mistake whenhe started beating me, the last time he hit was when i was 8 months pregnant, he choked me because I went baby shopping with my aunt after work and I didn't tell him the day before, he threw away the crib I bought. Then he didn't let my mom attend the birht or see our kid until he was 1 year old that's when my depression started coming back. Now he doesn't let me get a job and he wants me to work with him, but he treats me like sh** and yells at me constantly I try to make things work and I pretend that everything is fine and that we are happy but it's starting to show and my dad and mom know that things are not right and he is not what he seems. He thinks he is smarter than everyone and the he is the only one that knows how everything is supposed to be. He's always telling me that I'm worthless, since I met him I have gained 70 pounds that's icluding the baby weight that I have not lost. He calls me a fat pig and tells me he's only with me cause of the baby. I used to be a model back in Puerto Rico, I was beautiful and I know I can be that way again, I just have to leave. My son is so attached to him and he doesn't even spend that much time with him. Oh god I'm so sorry I'm just summarizing the last 5 years of my life. |
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carmen33
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Hi, Sandun, or should that be welcome back? don't know why you would not be considered a member still. A lot of times we need to start over, and sometimes we need to reconsider medications, have you and your husband tried marriage counseling? is there a serious reason you are considering separation? if you are in a dangerous situation, get yourself out of there right now, children are very resilient and they are generally better off with one happy parent than two that are miserable together.. |
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sandunbaby
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I would try marriage counseling, but a lot of nasty things have been said by both parties, I know that what I have said is out of anger and I have a lot of anger towatds him for things he did but I'm angrier at myself for letting them happen. he hasn't laid a finger on me since my 8th month of pregnancy, he does threaten me with a beating and I tell him to go ahead and do it see how fast he'll lose everything. Sometimes I think I'm trying to convince myself that I still love him, we can go months without intimacy and that's fine by me, I don't know if I love him anymore. I don't think I love him anymore. I find myself constantly daydreaming and fantasizing about my life without him and I have a plan all laid out for the moment we seperate. We're not even married my family convinced me not to marry him because my grandmother didn't trust him. lol I should've listened to them from the beginning. But then I wouldn't have had this amazing little boy who means everything to me.
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oldglory
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What in the hell are you sorry about??? I asked you to give me a summary of your last 5 years... lolol Seriously.. do you have any idea how many of us BPers say we know what is wrong and how to handle it and we don't want meds.......yep all of us....yep it's pure bull shit....RUN DO NOT WALK ....RUN...... AND GET SOME MEDS FROM A SHRINK!!!!!! If YOU'RE AS FINE AS YOU THINK YOU ARE YOU WOULD NOT BE HERE WITH ME..SOUNDS TO ME LIKE THE CRAZY ONE IS YOUR HUBBY..I will not be like your family and tell you to pack up and leave him..... I will however, tell you to FUCK THE PACKING....GRAB THE BABY AND RUN LIKE HELL AWAY FROM THAT DIRTY ASS HOLE!!!!! GIRL WHO TOLD YOU YOU WEREN'T GOOD ENOUGH TO HAVE A REAL MAN IN YOUR LIFE. YOU SURE ACT LIKE YOU DON'T IF YOU STAY WITH HIM.. BY THE AGE OF 4 YOUR SON WILL HAVE HIS PERSONALITY PRETTY MUCH LAID OUT.DO YOU WANT HIM TO TREAT HIS WIFE THE WAY HIS DAD TREATS YOU?? GET HIM OUT OF THAT ENVIRONMENT!! You don't have much of a choice if you saay your son is your life. Get him outta there. If hubby hits on you...no doubt, baby comes next. Start giving yourself a break. You don't need anyones disrespect. 70 lbs weight gain??????? well if he uses that against you he is a double ass hole!!!! Bet he isn't quite the same man he was 5 yrs ago either You remember........you can lose weight...he can't lose stupid!! Love Gloria |
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carmen33
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Honey, you know exactly what you need to do, I know that you love your baby, I know that the baby loves both of you, but you are not doing yourself or the child any favors by staying in a relationship like that, I don't normally put things as straight out as gloria does, but in this case I will " FUCK THE PACK AND GET OUT NOW" you ARE a wonderful person, you are worth a whole lot more than what "he" thinks that you are, I am very grateful that you listened to your family about the marriage thing, I am sure your Mom and Dad will welcome you home with open arms, so get out and get out now.. There is no person on the face of this planet that should be allowed to put his/her hands on another, and if he choked you while pregnant? how much longer is it going to be before he starts beating on the baby, and probably killing you? on your way out of there, go by the courts or police station and take out a restraining order on him, and do not be afraid to enforce it.. he comes with in a hundred feet of you put his ass in jail.. |
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oldglory
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hip hip hooray carmen!!! Love Gloria |
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