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Bipolar ForumsIntroductions & Personal StoriesHi I'm Heather and new to the site
06/18/2012 12:49 PM
bfly
bfly
 
Posts: 4061
VIP Member

I'm sorry he left... Really bad timing for you. I wish you strength.
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears. And how else can it be? The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Kahlil Gibran

"The sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being." Carl Jung

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” Leo F. Buscaglia

"Always fall in with what you're asked to accept. Take what is given, and make it over your way. My aim in life has always been to hold my own with whatever's going. Not against: with."
Robert Frost

"God doesn't give us more than we can handle, I just think He overestimates my strength!" lol- me

Bipolar I, PTSD, Bulimia, Anxiety, Fibromyalgia

Lithium 1500 mg; Lamictal 400mg; Busparone 60 mg; Armour Thyroid 30; Visteril as needed
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06/18/2012 12:57 PM  Top
Kayllia
Posts: 16
New Member

not sure if its for good or not.. he left some stuff here.. all he could tell me was to get right.. havent spoken to him today.. praying hes thinking about me and hoping im doing ok.. which im not.. had a break down when ppl in my office went to lunch.. had one of the girls here talking to me for like an hour.. i dont need him to get better but i love him and he was my strength.. he pushed me to get help so i could get better.. he pointed out what i couldnt see.. but yet he cant realize that i cant see for myself when i cycle..

06/18/2012 08:57 PM  Top
Kayllia
Posts: 16
New Member

my mom decided to go with me to my dr appt and my therapist appt next week... she agreed to start seeing the dr if he thinks she needs too... that solves one of my problems.. my fiance wont speak to me right now.. maybe its a good think for both of us.. i know i need to get right but it still hurts!!!

06/19/2012 08:04 AM  Top
Kayllia
Posts: 16
New Member

So far today has been one of the best days ive had in weeks!!!! still not happy but i feel better,, got into it with the other half this morning at 715 and i think thats what did it!!!! hopefully i can keep it up

06/19/2012 03:25 PM  Top
Kayllia
Posts: 16
New Member

made it through the work day with no tears.. YAY!!! got my pdoc appt moved to tomorrow so i can get put on an antidepressant because i know i need it.. the other half started to mellow out on me today.. this morning was really bad.. i was up entirely too long the last 2 days.. he promised to call me tonight but im not holding my breath.. ill believe it when i see it... but you know... love is pain... i cant stop loving him just yet so im hoping he doesnt let me down anymore

06/19/2012 06:17 PM  Top
bfly
bfly
 
Posts: 4061
VIP Member

Glad to hear you are doing some better! Hope your appointment goes well.
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears. And how else can it be? The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Kahlil Gibran

"The sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being." Carl Jung

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” Leo F. Buscaglia

"Always fall in with what you're asked to accept. Take what is given, and make it over your way. My aim in life has always been to hold my own with whatever's going. Not against: with."
Robert Frost

"God doesn't give us more than we can handle, I just think He overestimates my strength!" lol- me

Bipolar I, PTSD, Bulimia, Anxiety, Fibromyalgia

Lithium 1500 mg; Lamictal 400mg; Busparone 60 mg; Armour Thyroid 30; Visteril as needed

06/20/2012 10:09 AM  Top
Kayllia
Posts: 16
New Member

day 2 so far so good... the fiance is being difficult so im letting it go for now.. going to pdoc at 315.. mom is going with me so she can learn more about whats wrong with me and maybe get her self help too.. we shall see!!! its def not easy.. hard as hell to still get up and get moving but its slowly getting better!! maybe there is a light at the end of the tunnel

06/21/2012 06:10 AM  Top
Kayllia
Posts: 16
New Member

upped my seroquel to 50 mg and he said im much better than last week.. therapy starts on the 28th... buuuuuut im unusually happy and im hoping im not going manic right now.....

didnt go manic like i thought i was... but i was VERY HAPPY.. i managed to get out of the house and visit and old friend and had the most fun ive had in a long while.. it was nice to be the center of attention for a change.. i know i got a long way to go but the "heather" that i usually am surfaced last night and i have missed her tremendously!!!


07/02/2012 07:49 AM  Top
Kayllia
Posts: 16
New Member

Been a few since I've posted... Got a little side tracked with World of Warcraft...LOL... meds are working pretty good, seroquel still puts me out DEAD... me and the fiance are done... well as far as I'm concerned anyhow... he may realize what he lost and try to come back... but hey I'm actually ok about it!!! getting ready to get a lot of tattoo work done here in the near future too!!! things are looking good and im really happy about it!!! oh and the therapist isnt half bad herself... maybe itll work out with her...
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