Bipolar Support Group

Hello, I'm new to this site and posted a reply on another page. I just need a place to vent about what I've been through with my Bipolar husband of 9yrs. After a mental breakdown in May of this year, he was sent to a mental hospital where he was diagnosed as bipolar .I think the lost of his dream job 2yrs ago was the trigger. Right after he found out his dream job was a scam, the true downhill spiral began. He began to go into stages of paranoia,thinking his ex employees where stalking him, and putting trackers on the phone and cars. I felt so helpless watching the man I love go into this kind of state. I knew there was something a little off before this, because he had anger and control issues. But I never thought or even really new it may have been Bipolar. I was so consumed in keeping him happy and walking on eggshells not to make him angry with me, I pushed the signs of him getting help away, until the day of his breakdown, which then it could not be ignored. Long story short he left me on yesterday, New Years Eve, because he literally and actually thinks me and my family are voodoo/witch doctors that put some kind of spell on him to act the way he's acting, that somehow we are the insane people. For the past few months I let him believe this because this was the only thing I thought I could do to keep him from completely breaking down again. In high in sight I know it was wrong to even entertain the idea because me and my family are Christians. That's the main reason why I've been Praying and having so much hope he would be changed. But at this point I'm so emotionally, physically, psychologically, tired, I don't know what else to do. I believe in my marriage and want so bad to make it work, but that means I'd have to take him back and except that he thinks me and my family are some kind of voodoo/witch doctors. He's not on meds because he thinks he doesn't need them, and everyone around him is insane not him. We've lost everything, homes, cars, in financial ruins, he hasn't held a steady job in 2yrs. I gave up my job 6yrs ago to please him. I know now it was to keep me completely dependent on him so he could feel like he was the man taking care of his wife. Right now we live my family whom he completely disrespects and makes their lives miserably everyday with his false argumentative accusations. He left to go and stay with his family which he can't get along with even more. I'm so worried about his well being, because I'm the one that usually watches out for him. Right now the fight in me is gone, I don't even feel like fighting for this marriage anymore. I love him dearly....but this has taken such a draining toll on me that I'm trying to kind of just now focus and find out who I am...almost like I've awakened from a long nightmare or something. It's hard to believe he left me like that because we've never really been a part. I don't know where to start to get my life back in order and if he wants to come back, I'd have to except all the same terms because he doesn't want to get help, he thinks he's just fine. Sorry for the long rant again, but I'm really trying to grasp everything going on right now. I'm so grateful for this site to see I'm not alone, because while you're going through the rough storm it can sure feel like it. Because I've read other discussions and their stories, it's actually giving me a lot to think about. Mainly should I take him back if he wants to come back, baggage and all or should I just let him go on his self destructive way. I feel so helpless not being able to help him the way he needs to be helped and the possible end to my 9yr. marriage. I never in a million years would have seen this coming, and I'm trying frantically to figure out what to do next.

I'll close with sending Prayers out to everyone, and ask for yours.

God Bless!

I wouldnt take him back unless he gets help, the relationship sounds abusive and you shouldnt have to put up with that.

He obviously needs help and to be on his medication, but he has to make that choice. I would give him an ultimatum if that would work. Feeding into him thinking everyone else is insane wasn't the greatest idea. It kind of confirmed it in his mind. If he is in danger of hurting himself or others, you can have him committed. Until he gets help, he's going to be like this. I'm sorry that this has happened in your life. It's sad and frustrating for you. He would be a lot different if he would take his medication. No one can make him though but himself. I would recommend couples counseling and have a real good talk about how you and your family is not insane. The best time to get someone to help themselves is when in depression. When in mania, people tend to think everything is fine and dandy. I hope you can get this resolved soon. Take care of yourself first though. You can't help someone if you aren't well. Please keep posting. We are here for you to vent to and to talk to. I wish you the best of luck and know that we'll be right here for support.

What a difficult story. It sounds like he's having one or more psychotic breaks. Mania or depression have nothing to do with paranoia or voices, but psychotic does. It sounds to me like he needs hospitalization, but while he's manic or psychotic he won't go for it. Catch him in a depressed non psychotic period, he may go for it.

I agree on the committing, and really suggest a long stick. But keep tabs on him, if he gets on meds it will save his life, and maybe your marriage. Do your self a favor and get in touch with your local NAMI office about support groups and classes, the family-to-family class would probably be helpful.

God Bless.

Hello, everyone... I haven't posted anything for a little while because my hubby came back and I've been dealing with it every since. The first few days were tolerable, not too bad, but after that he went right back into his wild accusations about me and my parents. He has his mind made up about who we really are,but says he can forgive me and my parents if I would just give in and admit to what I really am (a witch). Right now I'm just numb to the situation. I feel like a broke down robot. Just existing. This bi polar roller coaster has just worn me down and my brain is just really about to just shut down and go into acceptance that this is who I married, It's not going to get better and just suck it up and live with it. I'm just so tired, broken and weary, hopeless. My family is really trying to deal with his outrageous outburst and theories. They've been kind enough to let us stay here because we have no where else to go, but I know all this is really getting to them as well. I feel like I can take it because he's my husband but they shouldn't have to. When I told him that I wanted to get a job, he flipped out saying he's going to take care of me and he just needed me to help him while he tries to go to school. My thoughts are not clear right now so if I just type words, that's why. I'm irritable, moody, and not real pleasant to be around right now! I appreciate all the words of encouragement and insight on here. Just wanted to kinda update on what's been going on and to post to everyone I'm hanging in there, barely. My Prayers are with everyone. Be Blessed!

MzJ - I can totally relate to your situation. My husband has threatened to leave on several occasions when in an episode. He IS on meds, but they aren't the right levels just yet. So we are just riding it out with him. You need to INSIST that he get on meds. If he refuses, then you need to ask him to leave until he does. You cannot keep this emotional rollercoaster up or you will end up with a nervous breakdown. Believe me...I know! That was the stipulation with my husband....Meds or Leave. This will just suck the life out of you. And add kids to the mix...like in my situation. 4 children, but only 3 still in the home. It makes for a very difficult situation. If you have children, do this for them if anything! My prayers are with you!!!! hang in there, girl! HUGS ~J~