Bipolar Support Group

I'm a 33 year old male who was DX BP2-Rapid Cycling+Anxiety/OCD/Mild Agoraphobia in 2007. Up until that time I had been treated for Anxiety/OCD alone mostly with a course of Benzos and SSRIs. My moods started to fluctuate and in 2008 while on Lexapro I began to rapid cycle. I didn't understand why I felt so all over the place but my Pdoc explained that I was most likely BP.

After a short trial of Trileptal which did little for me my Pdoc passed away and I lost my job for the first time in my life. Needless to say with a fresh DX of BP and no insurance or money to speak of things went south.

I ended up losing my apartment and was sleeping out of my car for a while until I lost that too. After two months of being on couches and the street I found employment and put my life back together. I was fortunate enough that a friend of mine offered to pay for me to see a Pdoc and get me on Depakote to keep me from some pretty bad mixed-states and cycling. The Depakote kept me stable albeit with some side effects for about a year when I came off of it due to a 60lb weight gain.

We tried several mood stabilizers and even gave some AAPs a go with little success or discontinuation due to side effect intolerance. This went through the midst of 2010 when my Pdoc put me on Lithium (which I was scared of). He wanted me at 900mg-1200mg but I couldn't tolerate it. So I took 600mg and "got by". We tried adding Topamax to keep my weight in check and to hopefully balance things before he went on a long vacation. As luck would have it, I had bad cognitive side effects (including getting lost on the way to work).

An emergency call to the on-call Pdoc resulted in seeing him on a regular basis and an increase in my Lithium. 900mg kept me good for a while until stress at work came into play. We tried 1200mg but I could not tolerate it so settled for 1050mg where I remain as of this writing. He added Lamictal a couple of months ago but it made me hypomanic pretty bad so I'm currently weaning off of it.

Like most bipolars I'm hard to treat as my anxiety can trigger hypo or vice-versa. So you never really know what's going on. It's definitely a daily struggle but with the help of my Pdoc and forums like these, it makes the bitter pill easier to swallow.

Ok, that was long-winded, but I figured I might as well get it out there.

You have been through a lot and i'm glad to see you have gotten over some of your worst times. I too take Lithium and am on the same dosage as you being 1050 mg. I was on 900mgs for so long but just a little over a week ago i needed my dosage upped, only by 150 mgs. I'm trying to keep my dosage as low as possible and i was fighting the bp symptoms that i was getting but finally caved and increased the dosage, in no time i feel so much better and relaxed so it really worked for me, i wish you well with your meds.

If you have questions or concerns feel free to contact me by private message (PM) anytime or any group leader.

I'm sure we all struggle daily but I'm glad I never gave up and kept fighting and always will. The Lithium works for the most part but I can't seem to get a serum level higher than .6. At that level I still have issues with thoughts racing and being agitated from time to time so I hope I can increase it with little side effects.

I'm at 50mg Lamictal right now tapering down from 125mg which sent me soaring into hypo land for a couple of months. I can already see a difference as I'm not as wound up as much and am able to have a good bit of quiet.

I go back to the Pdoc in a couple of weeks for a follow-up and bloodwork so we'll see what he says. In the meantime I've gotten back on my fish oil, folic acid, multivitamins, and am also trying gaba.

I recall when he first put me on 900mg Lithium I was at a .7 serum level and my mind was calm and little to no racing thoughts. Now that I'm at 1050mg my level is between .6-.7 and the racing thoughts are more common. I still function fine, but it gets annoying.

The problem is that anxiety and mania have similar symptoms so while you're treating the BP the anxiety could be kicking in. Which is why until we taper the Lamictal which was causing me issues he's told me to PRN benzos for any agitation or anxiety.

I swear sometimes I feel like a chemistry set. I'm hoping that I can stick to a monotherapy solution.

Janna