Bipolar Support Group

I am so confused any more, I try to help everyone who needs my help and it just backfires. My 17 year old drives me crazy and listens to noone not even me , hes on probation and doesnt care if he completes it or not but its all my fault . His father my x husband asked for my help and I gave it hes homeless and needed to store is stuff at my house it was suppose to be one car and storage trailer but now he has 4 cars and 2 storage trailers here and i cant even park in my own yard. but i am in the wrong for asking him to remove his stuff. and i thought because i help him he could help me and stay here at my house for a few days and help with our sons while i was away with my daughter having our first grandchild. The thoughts are so fast i cant write what i am thinking .6 more days till i go for assessment to get back on meds i need them bad i think.

Sounds like you should stop placing all the responsibility square on your own shoulders. Your ex is a grown man, it's not your fault that he isn't taking care of himself. Don't be a doormat. Your son probably isn't benefitting from seeing you being treated in such a way.

As far as the other issues with your son, I don't think I have any useful advice to give you. I hope it all works out.

Post edited by: Ikaz, at: 08/22/2008 11:15

Hey, Sometimes...you just gave yourself the answer. You said when you try to help others it backfires. That is the key. Let other people own their problems. You worry about yourself. If they ask for help then, decide if you want to help and remember you have every right to say NO. And don't feel guilty about it, dear.

Give the ex a time limit for storing his stuff...and mean it. He is not helping and is taking advantage of you. if he is homeless then he has to go get a home...you are not responsible for him. He will stay until you kick him out.

Situational circumstances play a large part in triggering depression and mania. Think about it like cleaning house, create a stable environment around you without all the extra problems created by other people.

Hope things get better for you soon. You have the power to take control, clean house, oh and by the way if the 17 yr old won't listen. Then set up some boundaries for him too, and stick to it...

The only thing that is your fault is allowing these people to control your life...make them take care of themselves, by stopping your enabeling them. You would be amazed how good that feels...try it.

Hello sometimesosad,Now is the time to shift your focus on taking care of YOURSELF. You did not create the problems your son and ex are going through, and it's not your place to save them, and by the way You Can't Save them, only they can do that for themselves. We only have the ability to save ourselves. If your son doesn't care, he should reap what he sowed, if he is on probation, then the court gave him a second chance,maybe he needs some time in jail to "Get his mind right". The EX is just that history. He had his chance for you to love and support him, that time has past. I know I sound harsh, but they can only drag you down, sounds like they both need to GROW UP.

Hugs Dreux