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zapitolove
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My husband tells me that he does not love me anymore ,that he still cares for me, i get very confused i see lots of changes in him from friends to daily stuff but what can i do to not make him feel bad about being with me. I really want to be a friend to him but at times he seems to treat others better than he treats me and he has no problem telling others that he loves them, this is really weird for me since i am supposed to be his wife you know the "love of his life". anyways can someone give me a suggestion. |
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clevergirl
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oh, sweetie...there are so many questions to be answered before I can even try to help...has he ever been diagnosed professionally? How long have you been married? How old are you? Him? Do you have kids? Are you in a violent situation? All I can say to you now is - the only person responsible for your happiness is you. The only person's behavior you can control is yours. That much is true. Repeat it to yourself as you shower, drive in the car, brush your teeth...with repetition, you will see the truth and likely be able to answer your question on your own... Say it outloud. The only person I can control is me. I am the only person who is responsible for my happiness. failure is a prerequisite to success
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zapitolove
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yes this is true,and i was told the same thing and that is one thing i am yet to keep doing. I have been married for 8 years on june 24, i am 30 years old and yes my husband was diagnosed with bipolar and ADHD almost 3 years ago. I love him very much but it's very hard and sometimes almost overwhelming for me. |
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carmen33
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Hi Zap, welcome, is your husband taking medications? going to therapy? perhaps you can try marriage counseling, but like the others said, you have to be responsible for your own happiness, making a marriage work is a lot of hard work, and it takes both people making the commitment.. I'll be married 8 years, this November, Hubby will be 60 in a few days, and I will be 49 in November.. we've had our trials, to the point of getting ready to separate, but both of us are working to save our marriage.. Has your husband given you any reason he is feeling this way? or is it just something he says? |
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zapitolove
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Ok here is the deal, 2 years ago he did do therapy, and treatments and finally he was taking Lamicital which was going well but later since the meds where so expensive and we didnt have insurance he decided that he would do it the natural way and went online and find out about how fish oil and omegas and B vitamins helped for his mental function, this however helped him sleep at night and to some degree it helped! I though that maybe this is ok for him since I didnt want to puch him to do anything he didnt want BUT he stopped and not to long ago I found out in a conversation he had with my cousin that he says he got cured in 2 weeks from the vitamins, of course this sounds really crazy because you can't cure yourself from bipolar but this is his reasoning and now he is walking around like a chicken without a head thinking he is cured and he is the real person now and that this is him, eventough he is not happy with what he thinks is his real self.......no you know why i am so confused.....this brings the reason of why he wants to separate, why he thinks there is no more love, why spiritually he has weakend and why so many thing. |
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carmen33
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Zap, it sounds like he needs to get back into therapy, help can be gotten for the meds and the therapy, go to mental health, I had too, an still am.. even with the insurance now, I simply can't afford it... till he gets help there isn't much you can do.. Your right you can't cure yourself from bipolar, even meds can't do that, but it can make it a lot more easier on him and on the family.. encourage him to seek help, and if he won't then all you can do is let him move on, take the chaos out of your life.
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