Paranoia?

Many blessings to you.

I, too experience the same as you stated. My therapist told me that its part of the disease and part of my background with people I love and (in my opinion), there betrayal and such.

I trust only my professional help (therapist, pdoc, homecare nurse, & social worker) & my children. The man I am with (who was my husband and I divorced him and after a year+ we got back together), I DO NOT TRUST as far as I can throw him.

My advise, talk to your pdoc about this feeling. See what his or her opinion on it is. I am extremely PARANOID person. I guess that is why I don't interact with people socially anymore. Dana

healing begins with forgiveness, both forgiving others and ourselves, this illness has a way of blowing all our faults way out of proportion to the way they really are, you've made mistakes in your past, we all have, forgive yourself and move on, congratulations on the new job, thought I had one, and it turns out the guy is a chicken shit, I worked for a couple of days, they claimed they were having training problems, and so didn't put me on the schedule for the following week, now the A-hole won't return my calls, my "paycheck" from corporate hasn't been mailed for some reason, so tomorrow I go to the labor board and see what they can do about it. I hate having to do this, pisses people off, but it ain't the first time...I've done that, lol,

To love others, we have to love ourselves first, and this illness makes that hard. You said that you believe you were dismissed from your last job over your condition? if you can have someone testify on your behalf to this, you can haul the idiots before the labor board and sue their butts, discrimination is against the law.

Carmen

Thank you for your post.

My understanding is that paranoia is an unreasoned, generally unfounded fear that others conspire against me--that others are not only "against me" but also that they are "out to get me."

Such fear goes to my lack of reasoning ability.

Paranoia may be a symptom from time to time of my state of mind and emotion, and the roots of paranoia go to negative self-perception, to self deprecation, and to the inability to see things in perspective--fear. Reasoning is the ability, in a sense, to connect the dots--to see things in the light of truth and to use truth to minimize fear. While paranoia is not generally in the profile of bipolar, the inability to reason--to connect the dots--is a common element in the profile of bipolar.

As one has suggested, I may need some reassurance from friends, co-workers, or loved ones; but it is my experience that such reassurance does not have a lasting or even substantial effect. Therefore, I must somehow focus on the dilemma of reasoning.

The remedy I have chosen for myself is to find others whose reasoning I may somehow trust--others who have demonstrated good judgement, wisdom, and fair dealing. It is not difficult for me to identify these people, because they "walk the talk." They are living examples of what they believe. I may not, of course, find such people if I tend to isolate myself, and paranoia indeed tends to isolate me from others.

Once I have found others whose reasoning I may trust, I have found not only counselors to whom I may turn when my own reasoning fails me but also models of sound judgement whom I may first learn to imitate and from whom I may learn a foundation for good reasoning.

In the matter of trust, I have learned that my mistrust for others often mirrors my mistrust for myself. To trust others somehow requires me to make a leap of faith, for, in my negative state of mind, no one can "earn" my trust. ...I won't LET them earn my trust. The leap of faith, so called, demands that I see how poorly I have managed things for myself and to see, quite possibly, that ANY other approach is better than the one I have always taken. With this mindset, I open the door to change my thinking, my reactions, and my beliefs..., to see the truth. These fundamental changes must somehow take place BEFORE my paranoia (fear) will go away.

I have found that a professional therapist, counselor, or psychologist is a good person to start with. From the beginning of my therapy, I began to open my circle of trust for others. I began to move from the dark and perilous shadow of isolation and avoidance to interact reasonably and happily with other people, including some of those whom I had formerly feared were "out to get me."

My reasoning today is so much better than it has ever been, and my growing trust for other people is a welcome miracle!

It takes time and work.

Do you have the willingness and desire to do what it takes?

Thanks again.

Kindest regard,

Jim

http://bipolar.about.com/cs/psychoticfeatures/a/ bl_paranoia.htm

http://www.mcmanweb.com/article-5.htm

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paranoia

http://www.hoptechno.com/paranoia.htm

Post edited by: JR1, at: 09/21/2007 03:26

Anyone else, I don't.

I have a horrible problem with going in public. I am constantly thinking that everyone must be talking about me. I also a have problem with rejection.... not so much that it is actually happening, but in my mind I soak up everyone's facial expressions or way of words and if I percieve them in certain ways that are negative in my mind then I begin feeling rejected and mad about it

Like the other day I had to take one of my kids to the ER. First, I began getting anxious and panicky for the fact that I was going to have to go into a room with other people that just sit there and look at me... lol (at least in my mind this is the way it will play out!) When we had to get up and go to register in, I was really becoming paranoid that when we returned to the room those people were surely whispering and saying things about me.... and when I return all eyes will be on me.

ROFL My hubby told me that he wished that he felt that important in thinking that everyone was talking about him hehe

But, its funny in a way what he said.... but in another sense, it isnt funny at all. I ended up in tears, aside from the fact that I began having panic attacks after we left

But, I am just really really paranoid. I hate going in stores. I hate doing anything that I feel like is going to draw attention to me.

This is why I stay confined to my house most of the time.