TAKING CARE OF ME

1. I am selfish. I do things because I want to do

them. Not because someone expects me to do them,

or to gain approval, or to make people like me.

2. I have enough respect for myself to speak up when

someone is rude or ugly toward me.

3. I make myself go to to work each day, and I don't feel

like going most days, because I want to take care of

my own life.

4. I give those around me space and expect the same in

return.

5. I live for myself and no one else, and expect

the same from others, I do not want them to live

for me.

6. When I love is is because the person is worthy of

love, and I love the strong things about them.

7. I do not make excuses for my mistakes.

8. I do not allow myself to lie, either to myself or

others.

9. I try to live each day and every minute in it like

it is my last, because it might be.

10. I would like to think when I am gone the world will

be a better place for my having been in it.

Post edited by: norma, at: 04/05/2008 21:35

I agree with what you just said. I have learned those things, too.

How, I take care of myself.....

I get up in the AM and pray, and meditate, and journal.

I take time out for me.

I eat healthy. I have been taking a food journal.

I get online to moderate this forum.

I keep my house clean, take care of my kids, and garden.

I have hobbies, and friends, who are loving, and supportive, and I am that for them.

I take responsibility for myself, my kids, and try to be an example.

I cook dinner.

I keep my kids clean, and wash their clothes. I teach them chores, and responsibilities. If I raise healthy kids, they become healthy people.If, I teach them chores, they can help me, too.

I go to the doctor, and therapist, and pdoc.

I take care of my mental health, and physical health, and my childrens.

I go to the gym, when, I can.

If, I take care of myself mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually, I can be there for my kids.

I have a relationship.

I have learned how to be honest, and communicate my wants, and needs, and how to give, and recieve. I have learned to be accountable for my actions.I have learned how to set boundaries, and respect his. I have learned, I have to find my solutions, and find my own hobbies, friends, and things that make me happy. He is only one part of my life. I have learned to share, how to say no, and not feel guilty. I have learned to put me, and my kids first. I have learned, that no one has a right to abuse me, and I don't have a right to abuse others. By loving myself, and treating myself with love, and respect, I am able to love others. I can also be an example for my 2 boys, and 2 girls. I think finding a balance is important.

These are great list. I don't know that I could add to either of these. I think that you have covered alot. These are the things that we need to do for ourselves to maintain a healthy life.

The one tht I can't touch is being in a relationship. I haven't wanted one since I divorced and I have many reasons for that. I think that I have to strive harder to be healthy myself before I can even consider getting into anything that deep. Although I feel that I am on heathly ground now, I fear that if I got into another relationship that I would take my focus off me and my grandson. Does this make sense to anyone other than me?

I have actually learned about myself. I have always been someones wife, mother, daughter, sister, or employee. I used to conform to whatever the need was. I lost all sense of myself and couldn't even answer a question such as "what do you like?" because I didn't know. Now I could go down a list of things I like.

It has been almost two years since I walked away from my marriage and have had grandson since Sept. I would change neither of these if given the chance. I really enjoy being single. I tried dating a couple times and the minute the second date was mentioned I ran like hell. The way life is now, I can do what I want and don't have to account for my time. I can make my appointments without working around someone elses schedule. If I feel like making a meal I can, if not the little guy would prefer something easy. Someday I may change and feel that I need something more than what I have, but for now, I am very happy with my life.

Thanks for reaffirming that it is ok to feel happy being single......

Sine my divorce 3 months ago, I have had a couple people telling me about their friend and/or relative they would like me to meet. I am really not looking.

First it was from being overwhelmed and the stress of the divorce. Now it is because I am focusing on me.

I am still going thru that phase that I can't even picture myself being with anyone else than my ex. Don't have any desire to be tangled up in another relationship.

One thing I miss is that I don't have that many friends. I used to have a lot more but over the years I have sort of alienated people ( my ex was so unpredictable... people felt uncomfortable around him)

I would try and make plans, sometimes it worked out, sometimes I was sorry I invited people over or initiated things like card games, etc, as my ex would be moody, drunk, make inappropriate comments, etc. So I got used to it just being me & my kids.

I have gone out with my sister & brother in law a few times and had fun. I am trying to make some plans to go places this summer with a few neighbors.

And, working with a good therapist is helping me.

So, it seems there are a few of us out there who are happily single

(((HUGS)))