Bipolar Support Group

I am trapped in a frump slump. I am now the poster child for "before" as in before & after the makeover. While this may sound fluffy & airheaded, I miss feeling like ME--strong, healthy, energetic, pulled together. I've gained 5 clothing sizes during a year of med nightmares & have 5 articles of clothing I can fit into. I used to take very good care of myself. Now I put off leaving the house & can't believe I let myself go out the way I do, especially to work. I used to LOVE clothes & being creative with them. I haven't looked at Vogue for 2 months & the only other time I did that I was suicidal (I work in scientific research & am not as ditzy as I sound). My bf is not type to comment, has only remarked that flannel pjs (24/7) are actually very sexy when the top button is unbuttoned when I apologize for not making more of an effort. I am going to go to the store today by 4:00 & look for a top, pair of pants, & shoes I feel good about & can afford with the gift card I've had for 4 months. I anticipate it will be a Klonopin moment. Thanks. Obviously not end of the world, I just needed to put that out there.

It's so difficult when our moods are affected and we find it difficult to do the simple things necessary to make ourselves look and feel good. I know there have been many, many times where I've gone days without taking a shower because I was too depressed and couldn't find the energy to get out of bed. My suggestion to you would be to start small. What about going to the hairdresser for a small change in hairstyle? Perhaps you could have a trim or coloring done. This is what I did last week and it did wonders for my mood. I also think your idea of going to the store to look for some clothes you feel good about is an excellent one. If you can find something that you enjoy wearing, that might be what you need to help improve your mood a little. My final suggestion is to try applying a small amount of make-up if you wear it. Putting on some blush or mascara can help you feel not-so-frumpy if you know what I mean. If your hair is longer and you're able to do it, you may want to also tie it back in a ponytail or braid. I have long hair myself and this is how I wear my hair most of the time (unless I'm severely depressed) and it helps me feel more presentable even if I'm struggling in the morning to put myself together.

I can relate. I gained 60 pounds this past year because of Zyprexa. I no longer take it and have been gradually losing weight. I went up 5 sizes. It was depressing. I realized that I had to do something to get back down to where I was and have cut out all junk and begun walking. It's working. I feel better about myself already. Even if I weren't losing weight, I feel much better having made those changes. I know it's hard to get motivated when the task seems so daunting. I needed support, so I started the Weight Loss Support thread over in the Lounge forum for weight gain due to meds and depression. Join us if you want.

blueskies,

I hear you on the frump slump. My wifey does it too when she gets down after a swing up... AND then has all the vogue mags, makeup, hair stuff dig into her and remind her of where she's (not) at!

Before photo, don't mean to laugh but I totally see that.

The only cure is to go shopping.

I know the feeling. I go through these slumps where I am just sitting there realizing that all of my clothes either don't fit or are wearing out. I have a huge shoe problem in that I cannot seem to find shoes that are both sexy and comfy (the last pair that was, I wore out in about a year). So, when I feel like that I end up going to buy one outfit. And maybe some underthings. Like, while I was working, I splurged once and spent $300 on new clothes, including a purple and black lacy bra/panties set. I still wear that set under my clothes when I need a confidence boost.

To get out of the slump most recently, I got a new bra (the first and only strapless/convertible bra I could find in a 44DDD), and a fabulous new top (OMG, I'm going to my bf's sister's wedding in a halter top! I haven't gone into public in one that wasn't a swimsuit since I was 13!) and I wore them out in public yesterday. I felt so sexy and so confident! I hope you find something that does the same for you.

uppitywoman mentioned weight. I can't believe I forgot to mention that. Last year I ended up gaining 30 pounds because of Depakote and Risperdal, but ended up losing it after several depressive episodes. My GP lectured me and said I couldn't afford to gain any more weight because I was pre-diabetic. That made me feel "fat" and depressed, but eventually everything reached the point where I was so frustrated with myself that all I wanted was to be a size 6. It didn't help to hear about thin, beautiful women on TV who were complaining about their weight because they thought they could shed a few pounds. Whenever I hear that kind of talk even to this day, it makes me sick. As others have said, I think going shopping would be a great idea to help lift you out of this slump. I'll be crossing my fingers that it does.

Thanks! It means so much to know I'm not the only one who gets like this. While it sounds like a ditzy dilemma, it is very internal for me--feeling so repulsive & disgusting--I do think doing small things to make a difference externally could help a little. I am going to try on & not just buy something shapeless in desperation. Like many people with bp, I have had what could generously be called an "eclectic" career path--I dropped out of the science world & worked for a designer I am very loyal to for 5 years. I'm in such a disheveled state I've stopped mentioning it to anyone b/c I feel it is bad for business.

I don't think it's a ditzy dilemma at all. I think it's a self esteem problem and that can be deadly for some. My self esteem is not too great. I also have a weight problem which has been caused by medication-this time. I have had an ongoing fight with weight and self esteem my whole life. I won't go into all of that right now but looking a Vogue and such magazines with the beautiful, "perfect" women has always been a bad thing for me. I look at those women and see something I will never obtain. And it puts me down.

When I get into the place where I can hardly get out of bed and get dressed it is the little things that count. The first thing I do is I force myself to get out of bed and get dressed every day even when I don't feel like it. After that I go on to the make up and the hair when I'm going out into public. Buying something nice for yourself is a good thing to do, too. I hope you get out of your frumpy place soon.

"Frump slump" i feel it Weight gain is a big no no and i have been avoiding the number.

As for my hair (terrible) i refuse to brush it or do anything with it. Usually its up or its just there. I also have long hair and oh boy it does make a difference when its pretty. Lol. Plan on doing something with it tomorrow (if i get to it) might make a slight difference in attitude.

I look like Rosanne Rosannadanna. My hair grew and grew while I wasn't paying attention and now it stands out in a perfect pyramid around my shoulders. Just lovely.

Last time I was at the doc, I happened to see the chart she was writing on. Obese, it said. Good. I avoid that not wanting to get up and get dressed thing by wearing the same clothes all the time. Like a tee shirt and shorts or yoga pants. Wear 'em to bed, get up and I'm fully dressed. The white flip-flops with bing cherries printed all over them really pulls the look together. Lookin' good. Drucilla