|
|
babeboi06
Posts: 98
Member
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
Why do i feel so much pain inside... i feel like i am all alone in this world... i think i should die there is no point of me living... you know... i feel like no one loves me.... and i need people to you know... every thing i care about get hurt.... no matter what i do i just cant seem to get it right..... i have so much pain right now i just with it was on the out side so it wouldnt hurt so much you know... and there is no reason for me being this way... i feel so alone inside i think every one should just forget about me i think i am not worth it ok.... all i got to say why me why do i have to have all this pain in me for no reason.... i should be happy but i aint i have been taking my meds... but i dont think they are working.... i really dont what am i to do.... i just want to start cuting myself and bruning myself but i know thats not right but i think if i can just get a little of my pain it would be better you know... dont worry i didnt those ok.... i just wish... that i was never born the world would be better with out me... my famliy hates me.... i have a dude in my head saying i am a loser..... i just dont know what to do i go to the doc this monday but i am so sad... i almost cried haha and i dont ever do that... but i couldnt cry for some right i havent been able to cry for like two years... i think i might have cried once but that was it..... i just need help and yall are like my 2nd famliy.... so people dont say you hate me to.... ok.... thanks.... Thomas Post edited by: babeboi06, at: 03/28/2008 00:12 |
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
|
TrueBlue
Posts: 22
Member
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
Hey Tom!! DO NOT listen to that "dude" inside your head that tells you that you are a loser! THAT is a lie, my friend!! You are not a loser!! You are a guy whose mother just had surgery and she needs you now more than ever!! What would she do without you? She needs you to get better, to stay on your meds and to be there for her. THAT is what you HAVE to believe!! GOD gave you a mother and HE gave her YOU!!!!! YOU HAVE TO STAY STRONG FOR HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just try to quiet your mind and relax. Know that you have over 1000 people here that are there for you, to help you and listen to you and love you, each in their own way, OK? You'll beat this thing, DON'T GIVE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One of your many friends!! TrueBlue |
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
|
morningglory/oldglory
Posts: 1906
VIP Member
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
Tommy, stop this bullshit!! I haven't talked to you for quite a while but you know grandma Gloria is watching you. I read everything you post & you have been doing so GOOD .....until this crap. Stop it or I'm gonna find you & give you a good spanking!!!!! lolol Get a grip, find a ride. & get over to see your mom this weekend. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and tell me what the hell you been up to!!! Love Grandma Gloria
|
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
|
carmen33
Posts: 5706
Group Leader
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
tom, don't know what got you into feeling like this except for the fact that you meds probably need adjusting, have you truly been taking them the way you should? the asshole in your head is just that, a asshole, as a alcoholic, we have those too, people in our brains that tell us we are no good, we don't deserve to breathe the air on this planet, that we are a waste of space, and you know what? that is a big fucking lie, being bipolar we have that same demon, and it is telling a big fucking lie.. Your here for your mom, and she is here for you, you have to fight to hang on till Monday, tell your doctor the truth about what you are feeling and get adjusted, why have you not cried? are you ashamed? do you think it makes you weak? that too is a lie, just stop fighting the tears and have a good cry, no one has to see you, and you don't have to tell anyone, tears are healing, good for the soul not to mention the fact that they clear out the tear ducts. Tom, you have been doing so well, hang in there, things are going to work out, I don't believe your family hates you, nor do i believe that anyone else does either, they just might not understand what you are going through and what you have been going through, as you continue to get better and better they will start to understand the pain you have been in... and if they don't? oh, fucking well.. shit happens. |
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
|
sheilabeila
Posts: 241
Member
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
Hey Tommy, my name is Sheila and I just want you to know that Ive been exactly where youre at and that I know exactly how you feel. Ive been thru it all, Ive done some horrific things to myself but it can get better. Dont give up and dont give in. I still have my down days but nothing like the way that I use to feel.. the pain that youre feeling now. If you need to talk, please feel free to message me. Love, s~ Sheila~ |
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
|
dragonfly2catch
Posts: 257
Member
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
tom now you dont want gloria to spank you shes good for that lol.listen to me look at all these people who care about you i have only read a few of your posts and i remember you and you and your family are in my prayers so that makes me someone who cares about you and i have never even met you.your stronger than this dont settle for the dude in your head kick his ass out he is not welcome.eviction notice served from all your friends on this site he has 30 seconds to leave or gloria is coming lol.. be sweet be blessed and we all think of you..:~dragonfly |
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
|
pixiedust430
Posts: 950
Senior Member
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
Thomas, I understand what you are feeling. I am a cutter. I actually relapsed and you know it didn't make me problems or pain go away. They were still there when I finished. Do youu have a counselor. Like someone that JUST listens. I think it would really help you to talk with someone every week that can ratioalize some of your thoughts for you. You just kind of talk and when you hit a problem they help you sort through all those feelings and that pain. It's great, and your paying them so you know you have someone who will listena nd help. This place is awesome but I think bothh might help. I think I have seen you in the self injury forum. Feel free to ask questions and talk in either forum. Hugs, Jenny
|
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
|
norma
 Posts: 4109
Group Leader
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
Dear Tom, Please see if you can see a counselor...or a therapist to talk about these feelings of wanting to hurt yourself...also meds may need adjustment...Are you doing any drugs or alcohol?? They can cause you to become depressed and counter any good effects the bipolar meds are doing. We care about you...and want you to care about yourself?? Hugs, norma "In the time of your life, live-so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but, shall smile to the infinite variety and mystery of it." William Saroyan
|
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
|
Gypsy
Posts: 1637
Senior Member
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
Hi Tom, I know you are having a hard time. I have been through this, too. It's a horrible place to be. I just got my meds adjusted, and it has been such a relief. When I am in that place, I just hang on. I have a therapist, and a case worker. I journal, too. It's good you are coming here, and talking to us about it. That way you don't have to be alone with it. There are also things you can do to take care of yourself while you are waiting to see your pdaoc. Go for a walk, get out in the sun, eat chocolate. Watch some funny movies. Hang out here, and talk to people, to get through the next few days. Someone is always here. What you are feeling is this illness. It's not real. It's the depression. No one hates you. You are not a bad person, because you have bipolar. You are getting help, and that's what matters. As long has you keep trying, you are not a failure. Don't give up before the miracle happens. God doesn't make junk. God Bless,Gypsy |
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
|
momof2rugrats
Posts: 394
Member
Send a PM
Give a Hug
|
Tom, Just wanted to say that I am thinking about you & hope that you start to feel better soon. Is it possible that you could get into the Dr. today? Amber My name is Amber, Im 30 years old..Married for almost 12 years to my wonderful husband (together for 14). We have 2 children boy/girl. I have recently been diagnosed having Bipolar II.
Im glad to have found this website..I have lots of supportive people in my family. There is nothing else like having people to come to that truely understand, exactly what you are going thru or feeling! |
|
Post Reply Quote |
|
