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09/11/2007 06:33 PM

Feel like I'm slipping

redrose
 
Posts: 142
Member

Had a very bad night last night with my kids.

My two daughters pulled some underhanded stuff last night and of course when I said something about it I was asked if I was taking my meds.

Why is it that they feel that they can disrespect my wishes and that when I speak on it they just assume that I am not on my meds. Of course that question just makes me angry and that made the situation worse.

Today, after getting grandson on bus I sat down and cried most of the day. Why me? Why is it that people think that the meds I take are supposed to numb me to any feelings whatsoever?

I don't want to fall into a depressed state again, and I am trying to prevent that but I don't know if I am going to succeed.

I called my case manager and asked that she come over and talk to me about the things that are bothering me, which she did. I just don't feel like dealing with my kids because I am so sick of them throwing my meds in my face. I have done damn good lately but I don't feel that they can walk on me and expect me to sit back and say nothing.

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09/11/2007 08:00 PM
Gypsy
Gypsy  
Posts: 1646
Senior Member

Hello, there,

I completely understand how you feel. When I say something to my boyfriend that he doesn't like, he'll question me about my meds, or my bipolar.

But, I know the difference between my feelings and my cycling, and my depression, and I am sure you do too. That all that matters. I wouldn't worry about what they think.

What matters is that you're getting help, and going in the right direction. You don't have to be perfect for anyone, either. You have a right to stick up for your self, too.

You took care of yourself, too. You called your case manager, and talked to her about it. And you are seeking support on this site. You go girl!!!


09/11/2007 08:46 PM
MsBimbo
MsBimbo  
Posts: 681
Member

Oh, Ladies! It's anything to keep them from accepting responsibility for themselves and THEIR actions.

It could be anything for them to get an excuse in like, "Are you on the rag again? or Do you need a laxative?" These are just excuses for them. Good Lord! Set some boundaries for yourselves and stick to them! That's the only way to keep your own sanity while you are going insane! Oops! Did I type that one out loud? (he he!)

We don't have to address their issues always when they misbehave, but when we are able to cope with it. I look at it like getting ready to have a party. I make sure I invite all the people concerned, have a trusted friend there for my best interests and also invite a neutral party to help us resolve the issues.

Oh, yes, Baby! You know they tried it on me and they learned that they don't get far on that road anymore.

We love and respect each other much more because of it.

Best wishes,

msbimbo


09/12/2007 07:05 AM
Gypsy
Gypsy  
Posts: 1646
Senior Member

LOL........I want what she had for breakfast. and what meds are you taking? I want some of them, too....okay?

Thanx....Gypsy


09/12/2007 08:25 AM
redrose
 
Posts: 142
Member

The meds that I take are mood stabalizers, anti depressants, sleep aids, and anti anxiety. Although they do keep me stable I have moments where it is right to be angry. I know that they did deal with me better when I was taking depakote because I just didn't feel anything. Never happy, sad, angry, depressed. That is the reason that I was taken off that and put on something else. You can't go thru life not feeling, although relationships were better then for them. They could take advantage of a situation and I would allow them to do that. That is not accepted any longer and I have set my boundaries even if it causes them bad feelings. I know very well what triggers me and I won't allow certain things to happen in my home. If they can't respect that I don't need them to visit.

09/12/2007 08:51 AM
Gypsy
Gypsy  
Posts: 1646
Senior Member

Hi, again,

I think you are doing great. I agree with what you are doing, and what you think about meds.

I was on Depakote , too, once, and it made me feel the same way. I am on different meds now, too, that help me feel my feelings, and help me navigate, and,know what's going on with me. That's how it should be. It is good to stick up for your self and not let people walk all over us just because we are bipolar and take meds, as if we don't know any difference between our mental state and our true selves. I actually think we have a bonus going to counseling , because, it enables us to know more of who we are versus those who don't know who they are, yet. Keep up the good work, Gypsy


10/29/2008 09:35 PM
gemliro
gemliro  
Posts: 18
Member

I can relate. I get an A on a test and come home happy, my mom thinks I'm manic and suggests Kolonopin. The boyfriend breaks up with me and I'm crying, time for me to go to the hospital, I must be depresses. Not everything is part of our disease. We have normal ups and downs like everyone else. Sometimes people expect us to be flat or "fixed". We were never broken, just different.

10/29/2008 10:27 PM
Macrina
MacrinaPosts: 245
Member

redrose, lots of good supportive feedback for you here. How old are your daughters? Maybe in their teens or early 20's? That could explain a lot of it right there, if they are. My 22yo daughter causes me more grief than my 11yo daughter or 3yo son put together, when she's got a mind to.

I'm not BP and you know what? No matter who you are and what degree of problems you have, some things are universal. Unfortunately, some of them are negative, like looking out for #1, or acting like an adolescent when you should be way beyond that, or even giving your mom grief in whatever way you can. Kids must have a manual on how to push our buttons, don't you think?

You hang in there. You're doing everything you should to take care of yourself. Your insight is right-on and unfortunately your kids are acting like brats to get the focus off themselves, which means THEY are the ones doing something they shouldn't, right? Not you!!


10/29/2008 10:51 PM
Zoe42405
Zoe42405Posts: 917
Member

omigod.....daughters! I have two adult daughters and they watch me like a hawk. Any mis-step.....confusion....anger (which of course they feel is inappropriate)....they call each other and decide they need to have a "come to jesus" talk with their BP mother!!!!!

Love them dearly, but they can push my buttons!

BTW redrose - good for you for contacting your case manager. You are doing what you need to do to keep healthy......and (we hope!) our daughters will see that!


10/30/2008 05:40 AM
DeliaAngel
ComingUndone  
Posts: 1444
Senior Member

I think they are trying to push your buttons - push your limits. I'm not very familiar with this area but you are still their mother, meds or not, and bipolar people still know the difference between right and wrong. It is unacceptable for them to think they can get away with things and use your disorder as an excuse.
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