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06/15/2009 10:36 AM

I've Been Missing a LOT of Work Because of This

HelloHighLow
HelloHighLow  
Posts: 105
Member

There are days when I just cannot handle being around people or when I just have an overwhelmed feeling and dread being at work. I either end up going to work and literally feel so sick from trying to act 'normal' that I start to tear up or even end up throwing up and get sent home OR I call in sick.

I was terminated from my old job because I started missing too much work and it's happening again with my new job. I don't really know what to do. I try to go in as much as possible but I just feel too overwhelmed/too stimulated to handle being at work sometimes. I don't understand why I end up feeling that way but I can't handle just shake it off, even with all the meds they have me on.

I'm really starting to get scared that I'm gonna end up fired again for the same reason but as much as I really am trying to tough it out it's just too hard sometimes. Even my coworkers are noticing I get 'sick' a lot. What can I do? At times I almost just want to give up and just quit my job but I don't have any other way to support myself so I can't. My episodes freak me out so much that at times I want to drive to the nearest ER and 5150 myself just so I can have it out of my hands but then I worry I'll end up stuck in there for too long and miss even more work.

Any suggestions on what I can do to prevent this? By the way, I'm already taking Seroquil, Lexapro, Depakote, Xanax, and Trazodone daily.

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06/15/2009 11:45 AM
mechjockusa
mechjockusa  
Posts: 2775
Senior Member

you should contact you pdoc, fisrt to get a written excuse to put on the records for being sick, second to see if there are any different scripts that he or she can give to you to handle your illness and fear of being around others. Talk to your tdoc and see if he or she has any tricks that you can use to not be over stimulated or overwelmed. Also get on this site and find someone to talk to when you feel this way we will listen to you and allow you to vent. Never give up on yourself easier said than done I know but you can pull it through it will take work but you can handle it.

06/15/2009 12:00 PM
HelloHighLow
HelloHighLow  
Posts: 105
Member

I would but I'm having an issue with my new insurance at the moment and I know stressing out about it definitely isnt helping right now. I'm supposed to go to my psychiatrist every 2 weeks and get my levels checked every 4 weeks and now my insurance wants to say that it's a pre-existing condition and that they're not going to pay for any visits related to my diagnosis. I'm not sure whether or not they're going to pay yet because theyre investigating it but I didnt get diagnosed as bipolar until 03/05/2009 and my insurance kicked in 03/01/2009 BUT i have been seeing someone for my depression, anxiety, and sleep issues since I was 16 (I'm 23 now) so some of the signs were there before? But yea, because of this I've had to basically stop seeing my doctor because I've already accrude a couple thousand dollars worth of bills that I may or may not have to pay.

06/15/2009 12:15 PM
YorkieLove
YorkieLove  
Posts: 7033
VIP Member
I'm an Advocate

I'm sorry that you are going through such a rough time. I find that if I bargain with myself for short periods of time. Positive self talk, they call it.

I'll like say to myself, "If you can just make it to break you can go outside, eat a yummy snack, etc." Also if I tell myself over and over, "You can handle this. Just breathe through it."

Then, I stop any negative thoughts. I guess that you should do that first. Oops!

Anyway, also seeing the pdoc to get your meds changed. I had the same feelings, but they are much better since I'm on the right meds.

Good luck!


06/15/2009 01:12 PM
BigJ

Insurance companies rip alot of people off while taking their money. I'm lucky mine hasn't done anything like this to me but I feel like I have the energy to start or join a pro-insuree rights/protest group to send a message to the big wigs in these companies.

I can't stand seeing people get pushed around or bullied by the thugs of big buisness and the government too even. It angers me to my core.

Every act of arbitrary abuse of power used by officials in positions of authoirty.... This is why I don't watch the news and rarely read the paper. I can't handle seeing the little guys getting stepped on.


06/15/2009 01:49 PM
HelloHighLow
HelloHighLow  
Posts: 105
Member

I do try doing the self bargaining trick but it doesnt always work. I end up sitting at my desk super antsy, with my legs shaking like I have to pee or something and I sometimes even break out into a sweat wondering how long I'll last before I freak out.

And BigJ, I agree with you, I cannot stand seeing people being pushed around. For some reason though, while I can stand up for others, I find it hard to stand up for myself.


06/15/2009 02:29 PM
Yrollam
YrollamPosts: 2476
Senior Member

Have you tried breathing techniques when you are feeling over stimulated and have anxiety? They seem to help me.

06/15/2009 03:26 PM
HelloHighLow
HelloHighLow  
Posts: 105
Member

Done breathing techniques, I even took up yoga for a year to see if that helped, but it really depends on how 'severe' of an attack/episode I'm having.

06/15/2009 05:07 PM
bagofcandy
bagofcandyPosts: 1259
Senior Member

HelloHighLow,

I know how you feel....This summer I will have been employed in my current laboratory for a year...during this year I have been mostly depressed, so I have tons of absences....and tons of days where I show up and accomplish nothing....it doesn't do anything for your ego to show up some place where you feel people hate you for your "laziness"....

I don't have any suggestions on how to make it through the day more easily, but I can suggest that you protect yourself by filing under the ADA.

If you work for a company that employs > 15 ppl, you can file for reasonable accommodations under the ADA. If you have an HR department, file with them....doing so means they will have to accommodate your absences, and your immediate supervisor need not know the actual dx...the dx just stays in the file.

If you work in a smaller firm that is > 15 employees then you still can file under ADA for reasonable accommodations but keeping the actual dx secret might be more difficult.

My pdoc suggested that I file with the disabilities office at my uni when the depression was keeping me in bed > 15 hours a day....I imagine your pdoc should know enough to help you figure out how to file....

A link to more information:

http://www.eeoc.gov/facts/accommodation.html


06/15/2009 05:13 PM
HelloHighLow
HelloHighLow  
Posts: 105
Member

THANKS SO MUCH bagofcandy. I will DEFINITELY look into that.
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