Bipolar Support Group

Does anyone else get what I always call "the guilts". I know from reading posts that I'm not the only one who has a problem with circular thinking. What I'm wondering is if any of you get circular thinking that revolves around feeling guilty. I'll do my best to describe: I'll start thinking about doing the dishes, which will make me think that I've waited too long to do the dishes which will make me think about how my house isn't clean enough which will make me think about what a horrible housekeeper I am which will make me think how sad it is that the house isn't perfect for the kids which will make me think about what a terrible mother I am.....on and on and etc. I'll talk about it once in a while to my sister or mom or whomever and they'll say "for goodness sakes, what are you talking about?" It's not that other people think these things about me. They don't even understand what I'm talking about but the guilt can literally paralyze me at times until I just can't do anything at all because everything seems like I've screwed it up so badly, there's no way in hell I can fix it.

Is this part of bp for some of you or is it just another part of my own personal craziness?

Zinnia I get this sometimes too I know exactly what you mean and I come here because my son is Bipolar so I don't think its from your BP It drives me crazy when I get like that I look around the house and just feel overwelmed with what I should be doing including I should call------but I should do the laundry sometimes not only do I think in circles I work in circles too that drives my husband crazy ...like half the clothes are folded and I wander off to the kitchen and start to do the dishes then I go water plants then by the time I get back to the dishes the water is cold then back to that load of laundry I start a lot of stuff that doesn't get done in any logical order but if I know someone is coming I can get it all cleaned up in a hurry.Guess I'm crazy too just not bipolar.but I can relate

YOU talk abouy guilty!!!!! At times, I feel like I am to blame for every evil thing in the world...if only I had..... I should have....why didn't I.....I think that this only reinforces the BP's thought of inadequecy. (Just one more reason that we cannott be loved). I don't know if this comes from the disorder or not, but I sure have it!! My consistant guilt is related to my kids. Without an example, I never really knew how to parent. So, every time my kids have a problem, I blame me for not having taught them better or not showing them enough love, or being too hard on them. Dang we beat ourselves up a lot...lol My daughter is divorced, twice. I have gone through some SERIOUS guilt about that. My son is also divorced...I was the one who inroduced him to the ogre he divorced......you talk about guilt........

Love

Gloria

Oh, Gloria and amom-thanks. I feel that guilt about my kids, too. I think that's part of being a mom. It's the best and the worst of love all wrapped up in another human being you feel totally responsible for. What is a girl to do?

You think a lot. And analyze things, I do the same thing. I analyze EVERYTHING. I don't know if this is a problem or not unless it gets in the way of getting things done.

And for me it does sometimes get in the way, circular thinking, thinking too much(who says it is too much?), dwelling on an issue instead of making a decision. There i have just done it that whole last sentence is circular thinking LOL. I think that it is different from .racing thoughts. I hate it when someone says my thoughts are racing. Here is how i tell the difference. READY. racing thoughts do not make sense, they are not strung together with a thought pattern. they skip around and i can't explain the progression. So when someone says I have racing thoughts i explain how i got to the point i make, leading them from thought to thought.

lolol I just don't know, but it's nice to know I am not the only parent to ever question my techniques in rearing.Thanx Zinnia.

Love

Gloria

I also do exactly what you described, Zinnia. (My husband is diagnosed with bipolar). Perhaps it's just natural for some people. Well, i need to go fold the laundry and do the dishes, and I think the floor needs swept . . .

Norma-you are so smart. What a great way to describe the difference re: the racing thoughts. Has anyone else noticed that it's all women here in this discussion-bp or spouses of bp husbands? Maybe it's a chick thing??? What do you think?

Zinnia - WOW, Yeah, I tell people this constantly & then they walk into my house & are like 'ummm, mess, where'?Then again, I may have a teensy problem with OCD..I'm constantly thinking how fat I am..It's all I think about all day long..I really don't do much about it.. But It's all I think about?Very strange!!I complain to someone I'm fat, I am like 10-15 lbs over weight...People just give me these strange looks & they are like you are not fat. I don't understand why I think & obsess over this ALL the time?

Ok, so, NOW I'm going to go clean my bedroom UGH..It's gotten to the point its so overwhelming now..That is one room I can shut the door on & not let anyone in to see HAHA.

Amber

Yeah, Amber-I wrote to amom that i once read that housekeeping is like stringing beads on a thread with no knot at the end. So true. I'm a little ocd myself, but I'll tell you, I know lots of women who feel just like we do, and they are (ostensibly) sane. I'm looking at your picture and you're not fat, btw.