Bipolar Support Group

Hey Everyone!Its me, the distant, lurking member I have been feeling really great this past week. I have been on Topamax for 1 month. I wasnt feeling so hot on the lower doses Start out at 50mg for 2 weeks, 100mg for the next 2 weeks. This past Monday I started 200mg. I have been feeling happier & more energetic. As soon as I get up in the morning I am making the coffee & unloading/loading dishwasher, feeding animals. Im getting more done around the house..I'm being nicer, more loving toward my husband.

Im just worried that I'm in a manic phase, i'm not trusting that it's the meds kicking in..At the same time, im not at a GO GO stage, Ive been inside the house quite a bit but not depressed?It's been so long or maybe never that I have ever experienced what 'normal' is.. EEEEEKS I said the word HAHA

I get tired early evening tho and I'm falling asleep on the couch at 8pm. I'm a real LIVEWIRE party anEmal!!

Also, Have lost 8 lbs taking the medication & the tingling in my toes have gone away thank god, that was the weirdest feeling ICK!!

Laters,

Amber

Post edited by: momof2rugrats, at: 02/22/2008 13:18

It is tricky to decide if it's meds or not. I usually find that this is where having someone you love tell you what they think helps. When we feel good, we don't want to call the doctor, right? But your family sounds cool and what I usually do with my family is just ask them how they think I'm acting. My mom will always tell me the truth, even when I don't want to hear it. I can't always tell either, because like you said, who'd know what normal is? Hope it's the meds working for you. I have two little ones, too, and it can be a lot, even without BP. Best to you.

Zinnia,

Right on. My mom does the same thing. She can ALWAYS tell - and I HATE that sometimes.

Amber,

Just monitor yourself closely, make sure to let your husband in on everything. I recently had a med adjustment, and I feel so much better that I often have to stop and wonder if I'm in a manic episode. But, the people in my support system don't think so, I'm sleeping (are you sleeping OK? That's one of the earliest indicators of a problem for me), my thoughts aren't jumbled and hurried, and they're not becoming crystal clear, either. I just feel good, like a normal person should. That's great that you're feeling better, isn't it amazing how wonderful it feels when you had almost given up hope of ever feeling normal again?? And you're losing weight - bonus!!! I heard Topamax was good for that. Still don't know why my doc never tried that for my fat a**!!! LOL

Kate - Your hilarious - Be good to yourself girlie Yes, I sleep VERY well!Thank you for asking HAHA. I fall asleep on the couch at like 8pm EEKS. And I get up at 10 to brush my teeth, crawl in to bed & im back to snoring LOL!!Good point, my hamster wheel has stopped spinning!!!Awwwh, it feels gooood.

I hate that old nastey depression...When giving up sounds so much better than anything...I am glad I didn't of course..

Gotta go, I have a sick one here...

She is callin' my name

Amber

hey I feel the same but I dont sleep its 2am now and Ive been waking up at 4 or 5 am and then I cant get back to sleep.

I dont feel like Iam manic but I do catch myself thinking I can take on the world kind a thing.

and Ive been spending money on well mostly bingo, but more on the rip off

card they sell there yea I guess it could be manic but I dont want to think about the meds not working because I want them to so much,

and I dont really know whats NORMAL hey thanks for listening.

My wife is my barometer. My kids are getting pretty good at it too - especially my thirteen year old. The other day, my 4 year old saw me posting here and asked if she could sit in my lap. When I lifted her up, she looked at the screen, recognized the forum, and asked me if I was feeling sad today! Freaking kids are amazing!

Aren't the kids amazing, not having the mania's like everyone else has, I don't have that as a sign, but for me how I knew the meds were working is I wasn't in the dark hole anymore, while I am not over the top with happiness, I don't have those black clouds following anymore, Amber dear, for now don't worry about it, for so long we haven't known what it was to be happy, or wanting to do things, enjoy, let your doctor know how are you are feeling, I am sure hubby has been with you long enough to know if you are heading in the wrong direction..how is the house coming along?

Magic, are you being better about the bingo?

Not sleeping sucks so badly. It just feels so wrong to be awake at 2:50 in the morning. I understand where you're all coming from. I agree with Carmen. It's scary to think you might be getting manic, but if the people you love and trust think you're ok, it probably is the meds working and all you have to do is thank your lucky stars and enjoy.

Sometimes I wonder if sleep is overrated.

Me, too, until I crash because I'm tired or I get real anxious and jump at the slightest noise. That's how it is for me the next day when I don't sleep much. This past week, I was up for one entire night-never even tried to get into bed. I had to be in this all day seminar the next day. I didn't feel tired, but I swear I was almost hallucinating. I kept thinking I heard a noise or saw something out of the corner of my eye. That's what no sleep does to me unless I'm manic. If I'm there, it doesn't matter at all and I can stay up for days and feel fine. Not manic now, though, and since my meds have stopped working, lack of sleep is part of the down side for me...

Sorry I ramble. I write for a living so it's hard to help.