Am I right or am I wrong?

My husband like most men I know enjoys porn alot. I don't usually have a problem with him looking, but its usually contingent on the fact he tells me and doesn't try to hide it.

This morning I walked in our bedroom,where both computers are, and he made a comment to me that struck me odd, and upon accident with him right there i see that he has recently indulged himself. I picked on him about it and he told me it was days ago.

Well, finally after putting two and two together and only getting 3, i looked at his pc, he had deleted his history so i couldn't know what he had been doing, but of course i found a way and cross checked and all the other paranoid goodies and found out he lied to me about it. It was actually this morning, finally things started to add up.

my problem is that for the last month not only i but others have asked him about his indulgences and we've gotten the response that it had been since before thanksgiving for anything.

i've haven't even remote thought that he was lying about any of it. but looking on it now i realize that there have been other inconsistancies that now make sense.

I plan on talking to him about it, but i'm not sure if I'm doing the right thing. I'm afraid that if i keep my mouth shut it will build and be a bad thing, like it has in the past. I'm also afraid that i'm blowing it all out of proportion, but it just feels like he degrades me when he lies to me.

I'm at a loss and want to cry, but i won't my kids are home now and i need to go get them to get homework done.

Melody

i get so worked up i explode. let off some steam and try to find a common ground on which you are comfortable.

Want to hear something funny? I had a boyfriend one time that would buy those titty books, and then hide them from me, of course I always found them, one time when I did, I confronted him with them, and asked if they were his, he denied it, and told me someone else would have had to have put them under his side of the bed, I had to ask him if he was seriously trying to tell me that someone broke into our home, came into our room and left those magazines..rofl.. I laughed in his face over that one, can't for the world figure out why it pissed him off..

Do talk with him about it, try to get him into therapy for it, it sounds like he needs it.

We have come to a compromise that should work.

I don't have a problem with him looking (heck I've been to a local strip bar with him) but like you said Carmen

"just don't lie to me about it.. I can't stand a liar.."

I think I over re-acted in letting myself feel degraded and unappreciated, I'm still getting used to being treated better than I ever have before and I'm afraid of losing it.

Again, thank you all for your words.

Melody