MDJunction - People Helping People
 
Ask a Question
03/15/2009 01:45 PM

Bipolar Disorder and Inappropriate Behavior

lokie
lokie  
Posts: 256
Member

What types of inappropriate behavior do others suffer from when manic? and, how does one recover from the embarrassment when you determine you would not have done these things? Please comment.
Reply

03/15/2009 01:53 PM
neondreams
neondreams  
Posts: 7297
VIP Member

I say things I don't mean, laugh at things that aren't supposed to be funny, hurl insults, tell jokes at inappropriate times, flirt with strangers, overspend (although that's no longer a problem now that my credit is destroyed thanks to several manic episodes) and scream at people if I disagree with them or don't like something they've said to me (this happens towards the middle of a manic episode). To make up for my behavior, I apologize to the people I've hurt and take them out for a nice lunch. If they're female, I'll also give them a card. So far, I haven't lost any relationships because of my manic behavior. I think owning up to my actions is largely responsible for that.

Post edited by: neondreams, at: 03/15/2009 13:55


03/15/2009 02:00 PM
rmm164
rmm164  
Posts: 2316
VIP Member

The biggest thing I do nowadays is spend too much. But in my younger days (I'm 41 now) I would go out with guys I wouldn't normally go out with or dump the guy I went out with for someone that seemed more fun or worse. I'd still spend too much. I'd drink too much then too. I don't drink now. I still get extremely irritable and bite off people's heads. I'm like Neon, I appologize profusely.

03/15/2009 02:07 PM
neondreams
neondreams  
Posts: 7297
VIP Member

Rhonda,

Your post reminded me of the fact that I used to drink alot myself. I was addicted to wine coolers and when the attending pdoc who diagnosed me with bipolar 3 years old found out how much I was drinking (moderately), he warned me to stop and said that if I didn't, I would most likely die from alcohol poisoning. I didn't need any further convincing after that and haven't had a drop of alcohol since.


03/15/2009 03:12 PM
carmen33
carmen33  
Posts: 8702
VIP Member

I drank a lot and used drugs during my youth (got clean and sober at 33) use to be with a lot of men, would snap and rip off peoples heads at the drop of a pin, wasn't pleasant at all to be around.

I no longer drink or drug, (at least drugs that are not prescribed), and my moods have become a lot more stable and predictable.


03/15/2009 03:15 PM
debiski
debiski  
Posts: 5493
VIP Member

I am BP II and don't get the highs that usually come with mania. In my hypomanic times, I'm a spender. I won't say how much, but I'm DEEP in credit card debt. I love to buy things for my granddaughter--to the EXTREME.

During my worst episode, I walked out on a great paying job where I was a manager and was very looked up to. I just sent my boss an email telling him I was going on medical leave and walked out. When I think about it now I know I was crazy, but due to my many dx's there is no way in hell I could work now.


03/15/2009 05:25 PM
scooby

Shame is what I feel about what I did during my last episode. With my disorder good sense went out the window. I made decisions based on rampant paranoia. I gave away almost everything dear to me, lost my apartment, furniture and the tools of my trade (was a contractor). My overwhelming feelings were that I felt only I knew what was going to happen I needed to be prepared for it.

Today, a year or so later, I feel I am still in a recovering mode and have gone through non-stop reliving the foolish things I did, remembering the relationships lost and looking now at my simplified bare-boned existence and remembering when I had an inheritance in my bank account and sense of security that went with it. Today my bank is a coffee can, but I make regular deposits.

Now I drive my life with one foot on the gas and the other cautiously on the brake. I have thought about what happened a great deal. Now when I look in my mirror it is not distorted like it was, and I clearly see how I was so off base and loony tunes back then. It's embarrassing to talk about this, it really is, but maybe being able to tell this story to other bipolars, even though I feel embarrassed, is part of my healing process.

I want to heal this memory and not have scar tissue form as a result. I do have some abilities and talents, and I'm not ready to hang my saddle yet.

Post edited by: scooby, at: 03/15/2009 17:57


03/15/2009 05:36 PM
lokie
lokie  
Posts: 256
Member

I can relate in totality to a similar experience. However, the guilt and shame almost always stand in the way of revealing the details of my losing all of my life savings helping a homeless man. And, this was the second time after rebuilding my account in 2000 that I did something foolish. However, when I really analyze the philosophical points, I'm glad I spent my money on him. At the same time I know I need to reassimilate my life financially. The shame for me is that I did this twice. I'm not sure if I would have made these decisions irregardless of my diagnosis. This is the most difficult notation to make as it indicates a big loss twice in my life. Now, most do not trust my decisions. I do know for certain that I will never allow this to happen again because living on the bar-boned existence as you mentioned is not pleasant--however, I must say without being too philosophical the spiritual connections gained cannot be measured.

Thank you for sharing your most difficult experience with me as I know--I really have been there.

Most Sincerely,

Linda


03/15/2009 07:46 PM
mmeek13081
mmeek13081  
Posts: 23
Member

My inapporiate behaviors are mainly my words. They are like venom. I fly off the handle too easily. I say hurtful things because I don't know how to react to normal situations. I yell and scream at my wife constantly over petty stuff. Our marriage is on the verge of collapse because she doesn't know how to take it. I think I am always right and everybody else is stupid. I put down people and alienate them. I say vile things to people that at the time I don't realize that I am doing it.

When I come down it eats me alive of the things that I have said to people. Especially my wife. I have put her through so much. I have lost most of my friends because of my behaviors. I don't want to lose my wife. I don't know how to make it better. I think she hates me sometimes because of my behaviors. Can't really blame her.

She will tell you that I am a very imature person and I am. I act like a child at times. I throw hissy fights in public. Ive called her names infront of people. I have publicly humiliated her time after time again. When I am down I do anything I can to make it up to her. I promise it won't happen again. But it does. I don't know how to stop. Im at the point that when I get like that I just want to go away until I come back down so I won't hurt her anymore.

My behaviors have put a damper on all of my relationships. I blame myself because I have no control over it and no self control.


03/15/2009 08:01 PM
JennyT

I "speak the plain truth," which basically means that I say things that really don't need to be said. I've ruined many things that way. I spend money I don't have, I say things I shouldn't say, I do things and people that I shouldn't do, and I make my life in "recovery" miserable. I also get wildly paranoid. I say things that aim for the throat.
Reply

Share this discussion with your friends:
<< Start < Prev 1 Next > End >>


Disclaimer: The information provided in MDJunction is not a replacement for medical diagnosis, treatment, or professional medical advice.
In case of EMERGENCY call 911 or 1.800.273.TALK (8255) to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Read more.
Contact Us | About Us
Copyright (c) 2006-2014 MDJunction.com All Rights Reserved