Bipolar Support Group

I'd really appreciate your views. I'm in the UK I am in a bad depressive episode that has been going on for nearly two years but after a potential hypomanic episode earlier this year I'm the lowest I've been. Usually the pattern is ok in the morning but worse during the afternoon. Now its all day and I just don't want to be awake. I've totally lost my appetite after having anxiety for a bit so I'm dropping weight quite quickly (again, after losing a stone in 2 weeks when I was a bit manic). Trying to pack in those calories though. Tried lots of different meds, currently on prozac, lamictal and klonopin and see my psych regularly but I haven't got private medical insurance. Sorry rather a long background.

I guess I've got to the point where I can't cope. I don't want to die but I don't want to be awake either. I don't know what to do with myself. Usually I psuh forward at all costs and work hard but I actually can't do it at the moment, it seems no meds are taking me out of this and I'm trying to get out for walks, reach out to friends and watch my favourite tv programmes. But I just want to cry all the time but I can't.

I'm at my wits end. I've had lots of CBT etc but it hasn't really helped because I'm a bit atypical and don't have negative thoughts etc. In reality I have a pretty cool life!! I just don't know how to deal with this anymore and wonder if a hospital admission maybe able to help? Any views appreciated.

Post edited by: sparkling203, at: 05/16/2012 12:54 AM

I just got out myself when your doctor has that talk with you and decides it's time then by all means it sure enough is time to go.

Depression is a serious thing and since you are getting worse, I would definitely call your psychiatrist and see what he says. You may need something done to your medications. It's good that you don't want to die, but I do understand that you don't want to be awake either. It sounds like you are doing all the right things to overcome this, but they aren't working. If it's really bad, I would go to the hospital and see what happens there if they can help you. They would probably switch your medications around more than likely and maybe put you in an outpatient program to help. It's up to you, but if I was at my worst, I'd probably try the hospital. I would contact your psychiatrist though for sure. I hope you get the help you are needing.