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05/14/2012 01:18 PM

Trouble on the home front

ZadieBlue
ZadieBluePosts: 4547
VIP Member

I forwarded some photos of my apartment / building to my landlord and he asked how things are going with the upstairs neighbors.

Real answer: Awful. I hate them. They're idiots. They grab hold and try to control everything.

But I can't say that. It takes me 3 drafts but I finally explain the situation, substituting in words like "puzzling," and I address their [gigantic] sense of entitlement. I have to. It can't be ignored. Example: Early on they asked that I not use the water while they showered [shyeahhhh, right]. I let them use my fire pit and they 1) used wood covered in lighter fluid or gasoline, then 2) just dumped the charcoal on the ground for my dogs to eat [picture black charcoal vomit on white carpet, repeatedly]. For months I tried to get them to pick it up -- even put it in writing -- until finally I spent 2 hours cleaning it. I then took the fire pit away.

I pay tons of rent, so why am I feeling so weird reporting all this?

Zadie

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05/14/2012 02:33 PM
centerseeker
centerseeker  
Posts: 2852
VIP Member
I'm an Advocate

I can't say why you are having trouble but for me I know I struggle with being perceived as a trouble maker, even when my concerns are valid.

They sound like real schmucks. I hope you are able to get that letter written!


05/14/2012 03:06 PM
ZadieBlue
ZadieBluePosts: 4547
VIP Member

I just planted my garden and I'm afraid I'm going to have to move out of this apartment to another town, idk, I feel like I ought to be packing right now, I wanna get out of here but it's sooooooo scary at the same time, it makes me feel like doing something rash and THAT'S NOT GOOD, my flight mechanism has been activated and I'm a wus I took 2-3x extra Librium to calm myself down, it's safe but it was a mistake, I wanna disappear and get out of this situation, I'm stressed and I feel hopeless, don't mind my wretchedness, I hate it when I'm stripped of power, when I have no voice, and I hate people who do that to me ughhhhh!!! Sad((((

05/14/2012 06:18 PM
ZadieBlue
ZadieBluePosts: 4547
VIP Member

Wrote that email but then called my landlord -- at this point one might say that I was overreacting, but I just wanted to figure out the situation. Didn't get much info, I just felt like a big pain in the ass. I'm miserable with regard to my living arrangements.

A few hours later: Total implosion, wanting to take a long walk off a short pier. I'm so pissed off and powerless.


05/14/2012 06:47 PM
porch52
porch52Posts: 717
Member

I hate that feeling. I always feel like if I'm sticking up for myself in a tough situation that I'm putting other people out, and feel rude, emotional and overreacting.

Calling your landlord doesn't sound like overreacting to me. There's a big issue going on, especially for the health of your pets! Poor things!

I had issues with my other tennants, and I was luckly that my landlord believed in me. I always paid rent on time, never called for stupid things, never had anyone call him on me. He was smart enough to know not to mess with a great tennant. I'm betting if you sleep it over, take up the email again tomorrow morning and send it you might feel better. You're doing nothing wrong by sticking up for yourself. If you aren't there to look out for you first, who is??


05/14/2012 07:29 PM
ZadieBlue
ZadieBluePosts: 4547
VIP Member

I've given my landlord six years but I get no credit for this vs. these recent college grads who have been around for a mere year.

A button has been pushed.

I'm trying hard not to "act out," like going to that one bar where people go to hook up. I've never left that place alone.

" . . . For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand". -- Yeats


05/14/2012 07:58 PM
ZadieBlue
ZadieBluePosts: 4547
VIP Member

Okay, I was totally vying for someone to say, "No! Don't go out! You'll regret it, you're self medicating, you don't need a male slut to feel better!". Not anyone's fault, this is not a crisis board. I am totally going out and taking advantage of a guy's affections. Screw it. It'll make me feel better. Right now I feel like sh@t run over multiple times on a freeway. I need someone to tell me I'm pretty, but I don't know if this'll happen due to my bad attitude and lack of respect for people (just being honest).

05/14/2012 08:11 PM
uncertainone
Posts: 754
Member

Zadie,

You are going out and going to have sex with some complete stranger because your neighbors are pissing you off??? Why don't you just tell the neighbors off???

I don't get it. I think maybe you are just bored and a little hypomanic and want to get out. Be careful. But you do what you want to. (At least find someone really cute!!!) Good luck, Maria


05/14/2012 08:21 PM
ZadieBlue
ZadieBluePosts: 4547
VIP Member

It's not just the neighbors -- everything's out of control and I just don't give a damn anymore. Besides, it's fun controlling yourself and others by rebuffing their advances. I'm in TOTAL bitch mode . . . .

05/14/2012 10:20 PM
porch52
porch52Posts: 717
Member

Zadie, just be safe, okay? Keep us updated on how you're doing. We care about you. (((hugs)))
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