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05/05/2012 07:58 PM

Feeling Foresaken

CAust3
Posts: 17
Member

I'm so hurt right now.

My roommate--a woman who's easily one of my best friends and biggest supporters--is having people over.

I know I'm terrible at interacting with people I don't know well. It terrifies me, in fact. I can turn on the charm, but it's fake. Inside, I'm a nervous wreck.

Long story short, I tried really hard this evening to interact and hangout with my roommate's friends, scared as I was. And it was going good! But then I made a joke, and really screamed the punchline. I dunno, I was just into it...But my roommate suddenly glared at me and snapped, "Hush! Stop it! Why do you have to be so loud?!"

I guess it isn't a huge deal, but it really hurt me. I made another (lame) joke and then had to run away, because my emotions were too high. I sent her a message a while later, telling her she crossed a line and that I was only trying to amuse her friends. But it's been hours, and she won't respond.

All of them are still there, downstairs. I hear them. I just wanted to be welcome, to be a part, and I thought I was doing so good. But they're there, laughing, and for some reason I don't understand I have to be here alone.

Anyway, I just needed to vent. I don't know what to do from here, but I do feel a bit better getting it off my chest, even though, to be honest, it all sounds childish at this point. I just hope she's willing to treat me like a human again by morning.

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05/05/2012 08:08 PM
2ofme
2ofme  
Posts: 1890
VIP Member

Public humiliation of another individual is NEVER acceptable behavior. Sorry, but no matter how much lip stick you put on that damn pig, it's still a pig. She knows your condition and she owes you an apology. Period.

05/06/2012 06:40 AM
uppitywoman
uppitywoman  
Posts: 42739
VIP Member
I'm an Advocate

I agree with 2ofme. She owes you an apology. She publicly humiliated you and that was embarrassing and hurtful for you. I can understand why you retreated to your room. It sounds like you were doing a good job mingling with the guests and your fun was cut short by her unkind remark. I would explain how it made you feel and see if she apologizes. Hopefully she will understand that she hurt you.

05/06/2012 06:59 AM
ZadieBlue
ZadieBluePosts: 4583
VIP Member

2ofme, nice Dr. Phil quip. This has everything to do with her. Perhaps she didn't like sharing her friends and was trying to sideline you. She sounds very insecure with a tight grip on appearances and "proper behavior". She probably didn't write back because she knew she was in the wrong but still had to play pretty. You have just as much of a right as she does when it comes to expressing yourself. You have just as much of a right to be happy. Stick to your guns -- no apologies for being yourself! Your roommate sounds like a major douche. Why is she one of your best friends? Is there mutual respect? Do you genuinely love each other? Or is it more a matter of convenience, something vs. nothing??? I know I'd be majorly pissed off if this happened to me. Not ashamed, just angry. Just because she hushed you doesn't mean you have a reason to be ashamed. I'd be taking a closer look at this woman. She committed a betrayal of sorts, and that's a sin. Hope you're feeling better, keep posting!

Zadie


05/06/2012 09:30 AM
ZadieBlue
ZadieBluePosts: 4583
VIP Member

My parents do that to me ALL THE TIME but insist that my problem stems from being a bad person, etc. we don't do feelings or apologies in my family, so I just get stuck with it.
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