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04/29/2012 12:34 AM

everyone is trying to protect me

cetacean
cetacean  
Posts: 223
Member

My friend has taken a position at work that she previously held but was taken away, Im so proud of here for taking back her position but Im terrified that our D.O.N will cause so much stress she will send my friend to the hospital. Trouble within the company is looming and all hell is about to break loose. My friend is my boss, The problem is there are others (bosses) who in an effort to protect me are trying to keep me as far away as possible from my friend. I dont feel threatened by her and I feel that she would do the best she can to protect me even in this state of mind she jumps in at times to protect me when she knows there could be a problem. Maybe they see something I dont or maybe its me who sees what others cant. I dont know but they take my faith in her and my understanding of what she is doing and kind of dump it in the toilet. Theyre trying to protect me from my best friend some one I shouldnt ever for any reason fear. Just curious is there a reason I should fear her I believe she has started the depression end of her episode.I would love to hear any opinions. Thanks
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04/29/2012 05:58 AM
uppitywoman
uppitywoman  
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I'm an Advocate

I'm not sure why they would be doing that. Sometimes in that situation if something goes wrong, it can ruin a friendship. From your last comment, is it she that has bipolar? Perhaps they are concerned that she could treat you differently from the other staff, holding you to higher expectations unfairly. I don't know. Those are just a couple thoughts.

04/29/2012 07:26 AM
cetacean
cetacean  
Posts: 223
Member

yes she is the bi polar,and being now one of my bosses thats considered administration maybe they think that she will try to get me fired or in trouble or hurt me in some way. I dont know either, I wonder if they think she may lose it.Can you tell me is the depression as unpredictable as mania?

04/29/2012 07:38 AM
hythloday
hythloday  
Posts: 423
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Yes, just as unpredictable but usually more visually obvious. Is she on medication? From what you're saying it sounds like a NO, because she should be working toward stability. A promotion could cause stress, which is a trigger for episodes.

Do these coworkers know that she's bipolar? Or are they reading some signs of instability? If the latter, then she should probably try to get some help, and maybe you could help her see that.

If she is your friend (at the end you even say "best friend"!), why not talk with her about your concerns? This is coming from a pathological avoider of confrontation, but if you can talk with her just mention that people have told you to be careful around her, and that that seems weird to you, you two being friends and all.


04/29/2012 08:21 AM
Joy75
Joy75  
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That sounds like a strange situation. Since she is your best friend, it's natural to think that she wouldn't do anything to harm you. If they know she has bipolar and they are thinking she will hurt you because of that, then it kind of seems like discrimination. Just because you have bipolar doesn't mean that you will get hurt. People are ignorant when it comes to mental illnesses. It does sound like she isn't stable. She should be calling her doctor to get medications adjusted or changed. Is she even on medications? I think you should talk to her about this. Communication is important in any relationship. She will give you insight as to what she thinks. It's sad, the stigma. I hope that things can get worked out. You shouldn't fear your best friend.

04/29/2012 06:20 PM
cetacean
cetacean  
Posts: 223
Member

She is medicated as to whether or not shes taking them like she should well Im not sure. To me she seems to be working toward stability, I can see the difference in her she is far more relaxed then she had been for while and she is joking and wanting to participate in conversations with me. Im the one she pushed away I kind of think she was trying to protect me too as well as herself by doing so.So i see a big difference. My bosses dont pay much attention I do believe they know she is bi polar and the one who is telling me my friend is not my friend and I should be scared I can see might be a little prejudice she tends to jump to conclusions to. My friend is also non confrontational and I do fear making her feel bad especially when she seems to be working toward stability I hate to take any steps backward at this point.I agree I need to talk to her about this no sure at what point, and how to approach her well thats another one like I said I dont want to move backward. Im half tempted to just ignore the nay sayers and just worry about my friend and my own well being thats really all that matters Im glad they want to protect me but... Funny I dont fear her and I dont like anyone telling me I should it just bothers me i guess. Thank you for your replies I will keep you posted Smile

Post edited by: cetacean, at: 04/29/2012 06:21 PM


05/08/2012 09:13 PM
cetacean
cetacean  
Posts: 223
Member

update, I talked to the boss that thinks she is protecting me from my best friend. She said that my friend could as she puts it" take me out" meaning like she could cause me to lose my job,get me in trouble etc..she also mentioned that she could not be friends with my friend because she is bi polar "she is just to dangerous" she said when my friend is stable she is ok but she wouldnt do it. I let her know that if my friend were going to cause any harm to me she would have done it by now and that Im not afraid and dont feel I need to be al though I am very aware. Its funny because when I look at my friend the first thing I do is search her face just for how she feels over all, i use the windows to her soul to find the truth (her eyes) I see someone I really care for that just doesnt feel well and she wont let me close enough to help her if there was actually anything I could do to change it. My so called dangerous friend isnt going to hurt me she'll protect me if its necessary and Im just as dangerous as she can be but if i do it its with full intent no apologies later. sounds almost like it could be discrimination to me but because my boss chooses not to keep company with my friend its personal reason not professional at least not that she is willing to tell me
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