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03/05/2012 10:55 AM

From hypomanic (or manic) to deflated

Cthebird
Cthebird  
Posts: 5274
Group Leader

This past week and a half I experienced a break through high-level hypomanic episode. At it's peak my pdoc was concerned I'd turn full manic and possibly have to go to the hospital. The thrill of this episode for me was that it was an elated episode unlike my usual dysphoric or mixed episodes.

After I saw my pdoc on Friday he advised me to restart Geodon and take Seroquel as needed. With those I was taking 3 moodstabilizers and 3 antipsychotics, plus Klonopin. This weekend was super delightful but more mildly hypomanic than high level. Despite that I had still decided that I needed to find God and Jesus so I went to mass this morning for the first time in 21 years. There, it wasn't quite the euphoric experience I had hoped for, but I was still very energetic, good spirited and a great jokester.

This afternoon I was planning a wild production for my pdoc that I will see today, but I knew I had to do a few errands. I set out first for the drycleaners and along the way I waved at every cop car I say (3). In the drycleaners I started to take out the clothes and something happened to me. I suddenly started to deflate. I decided that maybe religion wasn't for me. I would not act out the production at my pdoc's office. In fact, what am I going to say? So here I am disappointed and obviously no longer hypomanic.

Has this ever happened to you? This sudden deflation from hypomania (or mania) to disappointment (or relief if that was your case).

With all of my past episodes the transition from mania, hypomania, mixed mania or depression was not so sudden. It took months, with the exceptions of rapid cycling from antidepressants. But this doesn't seem like rapid cycling.

I'm sorry for the long post. Maybe I still have a mild case of hypergraphia.

Post edited by: Cthebird, at: 03/05/2012 10:58 AM

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03/05/2012 11:01 AM
Silverclaw
Silverclaw  
Posts: 379
Member

I do experience the deflation. I hate when it happens while I'm fixing up! I feel all pretty then I suddenly see something different in the mirror. It's like a slap back to reality sometimes. I hope your latest experience wasn't too hard on you.

03/05/2012 01:02 PM
freeemysoul
freeemysoul  
Posts: 335
Member

I have found it helpful to keep a diary. This has definitely come in handy when at the doctors. I will read an entry from a day that I was SUPER hyper to "prove" that I was manic because I am unable to convey "mania" when not in it.
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