i just do not understand

Recently while i was gone she sold everything i mean everything i owned my corvette for $400.00 my harley $500.00 and let the house go into foreclosure took every dime i had and then went to a womans shelter playing a victim i wasnt even around??

I have so truely loved here she would call me up and says the kids want nothing to do with me i lost everything,i was staying in a hotel out of money she had it all they threatened to throw me out she told me she would pay it NO show,i had to borrow money not to mention she was or is pregnant with another mans kid!!! I felt so betrayed and hurt and couldnt understand how she could do this to me after 12 years i would do anything for her.Yes i did end up in a mental hospital i attempted to take my own life out of rejection and loving her so deeply.

I am sorry for rambling,she was prescribed Lithium years ago but refuses to take it.Am i just a stupid idiot or is this the nature of this deal.She leaves me like 8 times a year and i always take her back,yeah i know stupid me..Any advice on this is really appreciated badly.Thank you for listening

I would guess that when she is doing well, you can't imagine life without her. If she won't take her meds, she is chosing not to get help, but then of course that is part of the BD to begin with, I think.

I do think that if the anger issues have risen to the point of your being stabbed, I would seriously question personal safety and the safety of the children. Are you asking a "should I stay or should I go"? question? What do you see your life (and that of your 4 cildren) like in 10 years if you stay? If you go?

Good luck and best wishes. You are not alone.

From your post it sounds like you have been to hell and back quite a few times with this woman. I am sorry that you are hurting and confused and I am sorry for your losses.

I don't think anyone can ever understand how someone could love a person who treats them so badly (mental illness or not), I certainly don't and I am one of those who continues to love the one who hurts me the most. There are those of us who do love unconditionally and to our own detriment - perhaps we love to deeply?

In the past I had heard the term co-dependancy but had always related it to AA. Anyway to get to the point this might be a subject of interest to you. After my therapist told me I was co-dependant the first thing I did was read up on it. Yes, it certainly applies to me!

The only advice I can offer you right now is to get some help for yourself, I think you could benefit from therapy. At this point you can only take care of you and you need to do that so that you can in turn take care of your children. You have to start somewhere and usually with baby steps.

Joining this site was your first step... Glad you decided to join us and welcome to the group.

lustrious

I too have gone through the dark side of co-dependancy. As Lustrious said you need to take car of yourself first. You can be of no help to anyone unless you are healthy. Talk to people here, it helps alot. We are here to help support you and we gladly do it, but this group is not a substitute for profesional medical attention. Be it psychiatrist, psychologist, or other. I have sought professionl help myself for codependancy issues, it helps greatly.

Please take care of yourself.

Red

I thought i was just so freakin stupid and unloved i just wanted someone to love me. Can anyone answer this ?? do bi-polar people actually know what love is?? Or is it just a game to them to see how bad they can hurt you?? Or is that a ?? we would all like to know.Thx again