Bipolar Support Group

Well, I finally have three doctor's appointments between Wednesday and Thursday. Tomorrow I am taking a sick day to go to two of the appointments. I feel so very sick and have for a long time. Nausea and vomiting started in June and robs me of sleep. At that point I thought it was a stomach bug. Everything else followed. I have very little hope though that anything can be done. I guess I am in a really bad Lupus flare. At this point I have no idea. I have scary episodes and I don't know if they are seizures or just... well I don't know what. They are very scary and wipe me out completely. Many times I don't know what happened. Sometimes I become stiff and cannot move. I also get a really loud prolonged beep in my ear that is deafening. I get pressure in my head too and I don't know if it is related or what. I get intense headaches. I see small blinking lights out of the corners of my eyes before an episode. After it happens I feel like going to sleep. I have had them happen at work and it has been terrible.

I feel very depressed and weak. The future doesn't look good at all. What if the doctors cannot help me? It feels like it is sucking the life out of me.

I don't really know why I am posting this.

Maybe I am looking for hope.

I must be crazy. There is no hope.

Sorry World

There's always hope, IDNK, so don't give up. Give your doctors a chance to figure out what's going on and fix it, okay?

I hope they figure it out quickly and have a simple solution for you.

Big hugs.

I'm sorry IDNK, I'm glad you are seeing some doctors. I hope the appts turn out for you. Please keep us posted. I'm worried about you. I hope you find relief soon.

Try to keep a positive outlook, if you can. As long as there is life, there is hope. Good luck on your appointments. Take care.

I cannot stop crying.

I feel terrible

Honey... maybe you don't want to... but If I were feeling the way you describe yourself feeling I would get myself to a hospital quick... unless my husband could work from home, or my mother could fly in from TX...You sound very sick right now. My heart goes out to you.

I agree! The fear alone would have me at the hospital, but it sounds like there are safety concerns as well. And perhaps some of your symptoms could be tracked more efficiently? I believe that if you are in a position to receive care and comfort, you should take it. And the hospital can be quick about ruling out serious conditions you may be worrying about.

As said earlier, please keep us informed! We care about you . . . My wish for you is that your health concerns are managed, that you feel less overwhelmed and less anxious. You seem to be so strong and resilient -- I'd be in the ER waiting room yesterday throwing things (not recommended, yet).

<3 Zadie

Oh, I am so sorry for all your troubles. It's good thing you are seeing doctors right away. Please let us know how it goes. We care very much.