Bipolar Support Group

Most of us readily admit we sometimes misunderstand or take comments others make personally, when there is no real basis for this. I'm talking about in real time.

So when people write something in this forum, doesn't it makes sense we might be having a bad day when we read it, or they struck a nerve, and since we don't have the benefit of body language or tone of voice, we totally misinterpret their message/comments. Then we get mad and strike out...grrrr.

I have a terrible flaw in offering advice when someone just wants to vent. So I ask my friends "Do you want advice, or do you just want me to be your sounding board"...it's natural to want to help someone is distress. I try and remember that when responding to posts.

Maybe when we post, we should state "any advice appreciated"...and accept we might not LIKE the advice we get, but can appreciate their hearts are in the right place. Least mine is, but again, I'm human and prone to F---ing up now and again.

I would never intentionally hurt someone's feelings but it happens. I know I've needed a good kick in the ass sometimes, and when I get it I can be defensive. After the haze clears, I have to admit they offered this advise because they care and share a different perspective than my own. I don't have to take their advice either, they can't always relate 100%, but I appreciate their attempts to soothe my pain/frustration/dilemmas.

We can all play nice in the BP sandbox if we remember and acknowledge our own faults too. Pass the shovel!

Imagine meeting someone for the first time. Now you have a wall between you and you are talking on a speaker. You push the button on the speaker and wait for a green light then say your say.

Now imagine 8,000 people all doing the same thing. You can see no one else in the group, the speaker makes you all sound like RobiRobot. No inflection, tone, no identifiers.

Gee, how could we take anything the wrong way?

This use to happen to me all the time when I first started participating on forums a few years ago. As time went on my feelings got hurt less and less. For me part of it was that I was unsure of myself, even thought I didnt think so at the time. Debates, and learning to voice your stance and opinions clearly and firmly are very good things. But more importantly is learning how to apologize or correct our wrongs appropriately.

If at first I fail to totally understand, I read and read again. If it seems the post is wrong or 'off' I re-read to see if there is an angle where I can 'see it' differently.

How can 'red' and 'read' be pronounced exactly alike but mean such different things? English confuses me. Thaqn goodness we don't speak Mandarin Chineese!

It could be worse, we could all speak pig latin! Remember that from childhood.

yma amena sia ulieja!

oh pig latin, my first foreign language. igpay atilay, oodgay imestay