Bipolar Support Group

Hello everyone. I am a 19 year old and I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder when I was 17. For years I would be depressed for several months in a row and at random times I would be hyper and incredibly irritable for a week or so at a time. I was bullied a lot as a child, and that contributed a lot to my depression and anger I felt. I always knew I was different, and so did the kids I went to school with. I felt empty inside and very lonely, and my dad was emotionally abusive, and he was rarely ever home. All I had was my mom and brother, and at that time my brother and I were on bad terms. I suffer from hallucinations and obsessive thoughts, and these have been the worst part of my illness. The thoughts that always pop into my head normally regard me hurting myself, and most of them revolve around my eyes. I have to wear glasses when I shave because I always think somehow I'm going to cut my eyes with the razor (just one of the examples of the thoughts). When I hallucinate, I see mutilated faces screaming at me. When I talk to people, I see their faces chance into these horrible monsters and they scream at me. I rarely have hallucinations anymore, as I am medicated. I thought about suicide a lot even when I was young, but when I was 16 it got to the point that I knew I would kill myself if I didn't get therapy. I started seeing a therapist in March of 2009, and in June she referred me to a psychiatrist, because she believed I had a mood disorder. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in July of that year, and since then I have been taking lamotrigine, which has helped me a lot. Therapy, combined with the medication, has really furthered me in life. I am now a sophomore in college, and I have a 3.97 gpa. Whenever I am stressed and feel like I am going backward, I paint [img] . Right now, however, talking to my doctor is not enough, and while having a supportive family and boyfriend is nice, I feel alone. I want to be in an environment where people understand what I'm going through. I am very thankful for what I have, but I want to have people who can relate to me. I hope I can find that here

Welcome. I am fairly new here, too. I hope you find what you are looking for here. I have found this group to be very supportive so far.

Thank you! I'm very excited to be a part of this

Welcome to the group, Saulmalone22. You have found a place where the people know what you are experiencing and you won't feel like you're on your own. I am sorry your childhood was so rough. It's good that you sought therapy to help you. That combined with medication does make a difference and I am glad that they are helping you. As far as suicidal thoughts, if they get bad, go to an ER. It's good that you have a therapist with whom you can talk through these things. Feel free to start posting and if you need to or want to you can private message (PM) me or any other group leader.

Thank you uppitywoman, I am very thankful to have found this website. I'm very lucky to have been diagnosed at such a young age, and seeing that other people are going through the same things already makes me feel better.

Welcome and thankyou for sharing your story.

Welcome to the site, saulmalone22. I'm glad you joined us.

Welcome. Looking forward to getting to know you through your posts. I hope you find it as helpful here as I do.

Welcome to "our" world....this is a great site. I hate bullies and I am sorry you had to experience that. It's amazing your transformation thus far and the fact you are doing much better.

Thank you, everyone! I feel accepted already