Bipolar Support Group

I could sit here and write a post about how miserable and hopeless I am, but instead I want to hear from those of you that have beaten bipolar and gone on to live happy lives. Please tell me your stories and how you got there.

Complaining only feeds depression anyway, so you may be on the right track.

I don't want to jinx myself but I am doing very well. I owe it half to meds, half to cognitive therapy with help from therapy and support groups. What I like is that I am not just well, but I am good at fending off any backsliding.

I wrote about the cognitive therapy that helped me so much in my diary, on my profile page.

I notice that most people who get well use at least 3-4 treatment strategies, and that they try to master those strategies, not just muddle through them. A few do it all with meds, but the strongest recoveries use many techniques. Meds usually can't do it alone.

I was forced to skip my antidepressant today due to a drug store problem, but aside from getting a mild headache I didn't seem to need it. Before cognitive therapy if I was even late with it I felt sick very quickly. I know I still need meds for mania but I am working on a cognitive therapy program for that to at minimum reduce my vulnerability to it. The meds do an excellent job but my manias are very nasty and I feel a need to do whatever I can to reduce the chance of their occurrence.

I was very sick before I recovered. My life was falling apart. My doctor said I might be his toughest patient. Yet here I am, consistently between 95% and 100%. I'm calm, happy, optimistic. The only problem is I feel bad for people who are struggling. I want to help, but recovery is mostly a solo journey. You have to find your own path.

Post edited by: Sparkerama, at: 07/01/2011 03:03 PM

I have been stable for sometime now. I am basically happy and content with my life and enjoy living. But getting to this place took some struggle. I was raped when I was 16 and that trauma added to my untreated bipolar, which, went untreated until I was 50. I suffered severe depression over the years. Sometimes suicidal. About 15 years ago I went to group therapy and there dealt with the rape and healing began. The depression got better.

It did not completely relieve the bipolar depression, but I no longer had that mixed in. I would have periods of stability and then get manic which manifested in going days without sleep and extreme anger. Then the crash would follow. This went on until during another dark depression, I finally sought help. My doctor referred me to a pdoc and I began treatment. It did not provide instant help. In fact, it took five years to get to the place I am. But I finally found the right combination of meds and dosages that works for me.

The one thing that kept me going forward and not giving up was my faith. It was the bedrock I needed to stand on when everything was crashing down around me. I know I would not be here today had I not had that to cling to. Everyone has a story to tell, and it is a story all their own. This is my story of how I got to a life that is good, a life that stable and happy most of the time. I hope others will share.

I have had much trauma in my life. My violent step father molested and terrorized me growing up. We lived in poverty. My mother was over worked and over taxed. Then when I was 13 I was raped by a 23 year old neighbor. At seventen I had my first suicidal depression, though I can remember being depressed before that.

I missed many opportunities because of my illness. I dropped out of college, got into many bad relationships, marriages, etc. I only experienced hypomania, so I often appeared ambitious and outgoing. I was very successful in technical college even earning a 4.0 and student of the year.

I still was undiagnosed. I began work in my profession and the cycles made it difficult to function sometimes, but I was determined and dependable. After some years I met my exhusband and we started a company together. We were very success for a number of years. We won a huge project and I began working 70+ hours per week. My son's pdoc asked me to take an ADHD questionaire and diagnosed me with this and major depression. She started me on an antidepressant and a stimulant. This sent me through the roof. I began only sleeping only 3 hours a night and seeing shadow figures. My pdoc was not concerned by them, so I wasn't either.

My marriage fell apart, I miscarried, my teenage son began to get into a lot of trouble. The contractors I worked for were excessively demanding. The project could not be delayed. I was just one person doing the job of three. Then after the majority of the pours were made, I collapsed. I had a nervous breakdown. I couldn't get out of bed sometimes. I slowly regained some functioning, but never to the level of before.

For four years I was treated for depression and ADHD while my functioning ability continued to decline. Our business suffered without me there pulling my weight. One day I began crying for no reason and couldn't stop. I asked my ex to take me to the hospital. He was very surprised, but took me. I was finally diagnosed with bipolar II. It took me 9 months and a suicide attempt to find the right meds. I finally found the right medications and have been stable ever since.

Even though I ended my marriage and lost the business and most of possessions, I have endured it all with very few symptoms. I even relocated to another city, lost my job and subsequently returned to school while remaining stable. Returning to school has always been my dream. I have also met the love of my life and we have plans for a future together.

So, after all of the hardship and adversity I have faced, I am finally stable, happy and hopeful for the future. I believe you can have this too.

I'll skip all of the depressing stuff and say that starting with my recent trip to Costa Rica a month ago I found stability after 6 years of back to back episodes. The Pacific Ocean was in front of our cabin and the jungle was in back and on the sides. Every once in a while a bunch of monkeys would pitter patter across the roof so we knew they were coming. There were Capuchin monkeys and red squirrel monkeys. I saw various birds such as toucans, hummingbirds and macaws and lots of ugly lizards. When I got home I still felt stable and now I'm planning on interviewing for an interesting volunteer position that will use my old Marketing skills. I see a future for myself despite some of my limitations, and even some of the limitations seem surmountable.

Although this is slightly off topic, once I got home and had my Lamictal dose raised my music hallucinations stopped. These were obviously seizure-related (I have a seizure disorder in addition to bipolar). The Tegretol helps both illnesses too. I like most of my med mix.

Post edited by: Cthebird, at: 07/01/2011 06:08 PM

I struggled from elementary through high school. I don't remember much of my teen years. What I do remember is not pleasant. I was undiagnosed then misdiagnosed until I finally had to stop my employment and enter an out-patient program. I decided to take a questionnaire because group therapy was getting me no where. I was called in to the pdoc's office a couple of days later and was pronounced with a bipolar II diagnosis. What a shock and relief to know that there was a name to what had been going on in my life. My diagnosis has been changed to bipolar I. I am seeing a new pdoc and have been working with him for the past 5 1/2 years. I may have bipolar symptoms every day and I rapid cycle incredibly fast, however, I'm a fighter and I still do my best to enjoy life to the fullest. Every day is a new day. I've been married to my best friend for over 16 years and have wonderful children. I'm finally at a point where I feel good about myself and life. I cherish each day (even though I get beat in Mario Cart Wii by my 9 year old just about every time we play - lol). Life is always teaching me something new.